“It takes way more energy to worry about something than it does to be relieved.”
-Chanel Reynolds as quoted in “A Shocking Death, A Financial Lesson, and Help for Others” by Ron Lieber in NYT (January 11, 2013)
Since I moved, I live a cushy life. My list of worries currently includes such non-problems as finding lamps I like for my new place and figuring out when I’m going to go to Las Vegas to visit my aunt.
I’d also really, really like to buy a new pair of boots.
One of the luxuries I allowed myself when I moved into my apartment is that I subscribed to the daily Democrat & Chronicle (our local newspaper) and New York Times. I used to get the NYT on Sunday but had to unsubscribe a year or two ago because I couldn’t afford it anymore, and now there it is on my porch every single day. This feels extravagant to me, like people who insist on bathing in imported water or who have their own private jets.
Of course, thanks to the article I quoted above, I have added a few practicalities to my list of worries, but they aren’t really worries. They’re just tasks I need to take care of that are probably not going to be that big a deal. Something I learned from selling my house is that a lot of these personal financial and legal things that used to scare me so much are not as hard as I think they’ll be. I just have to take care of them, and then they’re done.
Something I love about that article, too, is that it’s about a widow who encountered a lot of the overwhelming types of problems I encountered after my late husband died. She went along, took care of the problems, and now she’s made an effort to help some other people. I’ve been realizing lately that this is the only healthy way to successfully deal with grief–not just death, but any kind of loss. You have to have the opportunity to turn all that pain into something good, something better in some way, something that will help you live in the world again. I am realizing how fortunate I’ve been to have had that opportunity myself–a thousand times, really–with plenty of people supporting me along.
And so, you see, the newspaper basically pays for itself.