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April 22, 2006
Queen Amidala’s Diary, The Prequel, Part 2
Long Time Ago
Royal Starship
calories: 0, alcohol units: 0, cans hair spray: 0, winning lotto numbers: 0
Yeah, so, I wound up getting kidnapped by the Trade Federation. They sure didn’t cover *that* in Queen School. It was all you’ll-have-pretty-things-and-rule-our-peaceful-little-world. I don’t remember them saying anything about how the creepy Viceroy of the Trade Federation might up and decide to kidnap me for no apparent reason.
Typical.
I’m one step ahead of those losers, though. When I heard blasters, I ran off with the handmaidens and switched places with one of them. Good thing I keep wigs around for emergency use.
Anyway, the Viceroy had his cronies dragging the whole lot of us to one of their prison camps when the two Jedi who were *supposed* to be clearing up this whole misunderstanding finally decided to show up and “rescue” me. By “rescue,” I mean, “They took me away on my own starship and broke the hyperdrive.” They also picked up the planet’s most annoying Gungan, and now he won’t leave me alone. He says his name is Jar Jar. I really can't tell what the hell else he’s saying, and, besides that, he stinks. I think he might actually be growing some sort of fungus from spending so much time in the water. Those Gungans are disgusting. I swear.
Of course, Sabé is enjoying this whole posing-as-the-Queen thing waaaaaay too much. She just ordered me to clean up this filthy stinking little droid, but, you know, whatever. He can’t talk, and he smells better than Jar Jar. I guess you have to take what you can get on a day like today.
[Queen Amidala's Diary, The Prequel, Part 3]
Posted by adrienne at April 22, 2006 03:42 PM
Comments
I think Queen Amidala is secrectly thinking that she's made a drastic career error by not appearing in (what I think to be) the best movie I've seen a very, very long while...Kinky Boots. If there is a theatre in Rochester that is showing it (do they even have a place where they show independent films there anymore?), go see it at the next available showing. It's fantastic. You will not be disappointed.
Posted by: Jeffrey Lee at April 24, 2006 12:12 AM
I've been hearing about Kinky Boots. Someone was just talking about it at work tonight, in fact, but it's not screening here yet.
And, yes, of course we have independent theaters -- three of them. It's one of my favorite things about Rochester. I tend to go the The Little and the Dryden, but there's also one in Pittsford. I don't venture there all that often, but it's a nice place and always has an interesting mix of stuff (some mainstream, some independent). :)
Posted by: adrienne at April 25, 2006 10:27 PM
The thing is,now it doesn't matter about cultural centers as much.All media is being geared for home viewing.So,the trips to the city aren't as neccesary(sp?)but still there for fun at your own risk!But film is really moving to home theaters,with full selections of whatever you want to watch,whenever.I love the independants too--always have.Yet change is the way of life.I dislike those huge megamarketmovieplaces.I hate the dirt.I hate the fights(inside&outside)and the noise&folks coughing on me as my feet stick to the floor and I wonder if I've sat on some gum.And the seat kickers!Of course,these things happen far less at the Dryden,The Little and The Cinema.These are the only ones I can speak for here in Rochester.
Posted by: momster at April 26, 2006 11:59 AM
I'd recommend a double-feature: Kinky Boots and The Full Monty.
Posted by: Alkelda at June 8, 2008 03:41 PM
P.S. I'm glad to see more of Amidala's diary!
Posted by: Alkelda at June 8, 2008 03:41 PM