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December 28, 2006
Queen Amidala’s Diary, The Prequel, Part 7
Long Time Ago
Royal Starship
calories: Who cares?, alcohol units: Who cares?, cans hair spray: Who cares?, winning lotto numbers: Who cares?
I am so screwed, and not in a good way. Well, even that kind of screwing is only good one out of every few times. I was reading an article in Cosmo the other day that said that a woman is responsible for her own orgasm, and it made me wonder why I involve men in the whole thing at all.
Anyway, this stupid Trade Federation thing WILL NOT go away. And Qui-Gon told me that I can’t go back to the palace. Where, exactly, am I supposed to go? I started to get angry, and Qui-Gon got all, “You need to learn to control your anger.” Blah, blah, blah. I’ve got news for him: I’m not a Jedi, and if this keeps up, the Viceroy is not going to be the only one feeling it when I decide to start kicking some ass. I'm so sick of the whole thing, and these Jedi are no help at all.
I’m thinking about asking the Gungans for help. I know, I know, they smell, but they’ll make good cannon fodder, and, let’s face it, the Naboo military sucks. Just look at the way it took the Trade Federation about 10 minutes to take over the planet and kidnap me. It’s embarrassing. No wonder no other queens will hang out with me.
[Editor's Note: Don't miss Queen Amidala's other prequel entries -- Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, and Part 6.]
Posted by adrienne at December 28, 2006 09:24 PM
Comments
You've made my year by digging up this jem of a journal entry just before December ends.
Posted by: Julia at December 29, 2006 11:05 AM
I need to get back to escavating the entries of 2...life has been too busy and annoying lately...
Posted by: Emily at July 12, 2007 01:50 PM
I've been wanting to go visit Amidala again lately myself, Em. :)
Posted by: adrienne at July 14, 2007 07:22 PM