What Adrienne Thinks About That

Oh, honey. I am so with you. I was chased by dogs my whole childhood (no leash laws in rural TN) and bitten by one (an old one with flat teeth, thank God) but that dog was being held by its owner (a kid like me) so I could "meet" it. Garrgh.

Like you, I love dogs that I know. I love dogs that come to me and I will pet them all day long. But dogs that bark at me? No way.

I watch the Dog Whisperer--love that man and the show---and he's taught me so much. But I don't think I would ever walk by barking dogs. I would quietly join you on the other side of the street. That's not wimping out---that's common sense. Wait until the neighbor introduces you. Then you can be brave. And HEY! he really shouldn't be letting his dogs monopolize a public sidewalk.

Or there's always the option of bringing a treat. Or you could read up on how mail carriers handle this, as well. Or imagine me beside you as you bravely walk on the other side of the street.

Dear Adrienne,

"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.'"

You are totally going to Pack Leader those dogs. It's just a matter of time.

Love,
Eleanor's Ghost

Sara, I can stay on that side of the road and still be out of the range of what I know to be their invisible fence line. Still. I may try again tonight, or I may just go on a walk to the Leaf and Bean, which doesn't go by that house. We'll see.

Eleanor, Thanks for the vote of confidence. I'm usually so good at this sort of thing.

Cesar Millan, the "Dog Whisperer," is a dangerous man. His techniques should never be used by any sane person. Watch him for entertainment...not to learn.

As an owner of a big, barking dog (hey...63 pounds of German Sherpherd mix is a big dog...!), I understand where you're coming from. Sophie is generally pretty good outside the home when meeting people, but she will warn strangers when they are coming onto her property.

Funny thing is, while she's barking, her tail is wagging frantically the entire time and her body language is nothing be friendly. Her big bark is just a ruse. I know this. Strangers do not. And so, I am sensitive to the fear people have of dogs.

Anytime you want help working on this fear, Adrienne, let us know. Sophie loves to play the part of the big, fierce dog, but she's just a loud greeter. I can help you with dog body language, too, so you know if a dog is really being aggressive and you should probably do more than just cross the street. :/

I've never been bitten, but I so dislike dogs roaring at me. The dogs are okay - it's the owners who let their dogs bark or snarl at me without even a word of admonishment when I go jogging by (as far away as possible).
Cats are so much quieter and less fearsome...

Sabrina, Sophie's always very nice to me, so I like her. I can totally see through her barking. :) In terms of body language, I always tend to be wary if I don't see them wagging their tails. (When I was a kid, incidentally, we always had dogs, a couple big dogs (one a black lab, one a mutt), and I loved them all like crazy.)

Eva, My cat Benny can be kind of fearsome sometimes, but he makes up for it by being charming and handsome.

My daughter loved dogs when she was a baby, but one encounter with an overexuberant, large dog when she was a toddler put her off them big time. We've had advice to take things slowly with her and not force the issue, but it's a real challenge at times. I really appreciate the considerate dog owners. (For the record, having an unleashed dog bound up to us while the neighbor cheerily calls out, "She loves children! She's just friendly!" isn't reassuring.) I think you are wise to be cautious and wait until the neighbor introduces you to the dogs.

I'm with Farida. I'm also with Sara in that barking dogs usually scare me. The big ones. And even the little ones get too much in my personal space. I have all the respect in the world for dogs and think they probably know waaaay more than we humans, as in it's almost like I feel humbled to be in the presence of those really big beautiful wise smart ones, but that still doesn't make me wanna own one.

I decided to walk to our library one pretty Spring day last year with the girls---the back way, through our neighborhood---and a cop stopped to ask me if I'd seen a big dog, that someone had called in a vicious, rabid, killer dog. Or something like that. We picked up our pace after that, and I vowed to never walk there again. Pretty sad, but that's how scared they make me. Once, when I interned in a high school library for the grad degree, a girl who had been bitten HARD by a dog in her LEG, stopped by the library to show us all, and--to my surprise--I got weak in the knees and the room started spinning a lot.

You have conquered quite a bit, I say, and have been dealt more Bravery Face-Offs than most people I know. I had NO IDEA even that your husband died in your actual living room and I gasped very loudly and cried when I read that, honestly, and you are allowed to be scared of dogs, o loradmercy sweet Jesus and heaven bless you.

Farida, Poor M! Have you guys seen May I Pet Your Dog? by Stephanie Calmenson and Jan Ormerod? That's a good how-to-behave-around-dogs book. I give it to kids who are afraid of dogs at my library with some regularity.

Jules, Thank you for those blessings. Honestly, having Bri die in the living room was the best thing. That's where we both wanted to be, and we were comfortable, and he just died quietly in his sleep. It was very peaceful, and it would have been so much harder if he was in a hospital or we were separated.

Lucas and I walk to school quite often when the weather's good, and every time I hear a dog barking at us, I have that heart-leaping thing where I jump to thinking about how I would protect Lucas. He's scared of dogs, too, so we'd be a fine pair in that particular situation. Lucky for him, I'm tough when it comes right down to it.

Damn skippy you're tough.

i know what you mean about barking dogs that are loose, especially BIG ones,scary stuff.In our neighborhood out here in Az a lot of the neighbors find a need to have "killer" dogs that snarl to protect their property. Not us, we have this 'little Big mouth" that will snarl right back at those killer dogs behind their fences(thank goodness for the fence!). I too get scared when I see a dog loose, and I love dogs,but just not the kind that bite!
You really went thru a lot with Bri over the years, but I know he died where he wanted to be,in his own home, with the love of his life,you!
And I really do appreciate all that you did for him, and so did he.Hugs from Don and me for that.

Linda, Boomer's pretty sweet. :) And thanks about Bri. I still think of him every single day. I think I still mention his name at least once a day. One of a kind, he was.

I still think about Bri everyday too Adrienne,he realy was one of a kind, and we all miss him.....

You have been through things I cannot even fathom.

I love dogs and cats. Always have. I did have a bad experience about 10 years ago though where I was bitten by a pit bull/chow - not a charming mix of breeds. That was hard. I do now interact more carefully with dogs now because of that. I agree with other commenters that it's all about the responsibility of the pet owners and it's sad when children come into the mix :(

I've placed a reserve on the book, Adrienne. Thanks so much.