What Adrienne Thinks About That

June 27, 2009

Strep Throat or Swine Flu or Maybe Mono

I have been a children's librarian for about a decade now. When I tell people who don't know much about kids that I am a children's librarian, most of them respond with an "Oh, that's nice" in a tone most commonly reserved for children, as if my life is full of sunshine and puppies and it would not do to converse with me with too much attention or conviction.

When I went to the doctor with a very sore throat the other day, though, and when he asked if I'd been around any kids lately, I said, "Well, yeah, about three or four hundred this week. I'm a children's librarian."

Then the doctor said, "Oh, God. You could have anything."

Thanks to my years of working with kids, I hardly ever get sick--certainly nothing that sends me to the doctor begging for help the way I did the other day. It was he who had to tell me that the aching in all my joints was probably caused by the fever I didn't realize I had. (Him: "Didn't you take your temperature before you decided to come in?" Me: "No.") I knew I might be in trouble when I woke up Thursday morning and my throat hurt so badly that I didn't want to make coffee. I knew I'd regret not having caffeine, so I got a frozen coffee, which I could manage. It wasn't until about noon that I felt like lying down on the floor in the Children's Room and going to sleep.

Still, I thought I probably had a sinus infection and was just being a wimp. The doctor said no, it's strep or the swine flu or maybe mono. He prescribed an antibiotic, ran some tests, and told me to come back Monday if I wasn't better.

So I've been doing this "sick" thing I've heard so much about. It's kind of a drag. Mostly, I sleep. My throat and aches started feeling better pretty quickly once I started the antibiotic, but the least little thing tires me out. This means I have to reserve my energy for the basics: showering, eating, maybe reading a magazine or doing a crossword puzzle. I don't have the attention span for a novel (or even to complete a crossword puzzle--in the last two days, I've started about five of them, but I abandon them as soon as I come across a section I can't solve). I see why people avoid and complain about this so.

On the bright side, I've let myself eat as much ice cream as I want, and I've still somehow dropped a pound. A weak huzzah to that.

Posted by adrienne at 12:22 PM | Comments (14)

June 16, 2009

The Drug Talk, or We Are Not Cocaine People

Lucas: Guess what I learned? Caffeine is a gateway drug.
Me: [Almost spits out coffee. Swallows.] What? Who told you that?
Lucas: I read it. In a book. At school.
Me: Do you even know what a gateway drug is?
Lucas: Yeah.
Me: What?
Lucas: It's a drug young people use, like inhalants, alcohol, marijuana, stuff like that.
Me: Well, that's one way to put it. It's a drug that leads you to using another drug. Like the way using cocaine can lead to using crack. Do you know what cocaine is?
Lucas: Yeah.
Me: Now that's a really bad drug, but crack is even worse. Did they teach you about crack?
Lucas: Mom says there's crack in the chocolate milk from the Diary.
Me: She's being sarcastic. There isn't really crack in the chocolate milk. What your mom means is that the chocolate milk is highly addictive, the way crack is. Crack melts your brain.
Lucas: Didn't you guys put cocaine in the peach jam you made last year, but then cooking it took all the bad stuff out?
Me: NO! That was chocolate liqueur, alcohol. We are not cocaine people.
Lucas: Oh, yeah, alcohol. [laughs]
Me: Caffeine isn't so bad if you don't have too much of it.
Lucas: The book said kids shouldn't drink coffee.
Me: No, you shouldn't. It will stunt your growth. I don't have to worry about that. My growth was stunted a long time ago.
Lucas: Yeah, you're short.
Me: I have to get ready for work.

Most notable about this conversation is my use of the phrase "It will stunt your growth" in a completely unironic way. As if that particular warning ever stopped anyone in my generation from doing anything. The part of the conversation I found most disturbing was Lucas's use of the words "inhalants" and "marijuana." I know he's at exactly the right age to teach kids about this stuff, but ACK. I didn't realize it was happening.

Now I have to have an extra cup of coffee.

Posted by adrienne at 09:05 AM | Comments (19)

June 06, 2009

"Bicycle! Bicycle!"

Today, I decided to go out for a bike ride. Through the year, I spend a lot of time riding fake bikes. I like spinning class at the Y because it burns a lot of calories, and I like the plain old exercise bikes out on the floor because I can ride them and read. But riding real bikes out in the world is so much better than riding fake bikes at the Y. Riding my bike is one of the few things in my life that makes me feel like I am absolutely entitled to act like a 10-year-old. I like to cut through parking lots and see how fast I can hit speed bumps and coast down hills with my feet kicked out to the sides. This spring, Tammy (without whom I wouldn't even have a bike) ensured that the Easter Bunny brought me a bell with yellow flowers for my bike, so now I can add randomly ringing my bike bell to my usual shenanigans, which I do.

I love summer.

Posted by adrienne at 04:58 PM | Comments (11)

May 31, 2009

Dill and Stuff

One advantage of neglecting my gardens late in the year last year is that I suddenly find myself with a quite unexpected bumper crop of dill. Turns out if you let dill go to seed and ignore it, it will sprout up all over the place the next spring, even the sidewalk cracks. Since the neighbor's lilacs went south, dill is the first thing I smell when I walk out the door every morning.

Currently, my favorite thing to do with dill is to make cucumber salad with a yogurt dill dressing, but it's also quite nice on roasted potatoes or in mashed potatoes, with lots of butter. Mmmmm.

Speaking of butter, the thing is that I've had this cold. Everyone KNOWS you have to feed a cold, and it was only about fifty degrees here today, which made a cold cucumber salad sound a little eh. So I decided to make a nice, big, melty batch of homemade macaroni and cheese. I even had some breadcrumbs in the freezer, which I whipped up with some butter (because the five tablespoons I'd used in the Bechamel sauce really just wasn't enough) and spread all over the top before I put the whole cheesy, yummy mess in the oven. Yes, it had everything good: butter, cheese, and lots of white flour. I ate three helpings.

Tomorrow, it's back to the cucumbers and dill, and probably the gym.

Posted by adrienne at 08:22 PM | Comments (12)

May 27, 2009

Library Club in the Newspaper

Read it here.

I would like to point out that while there is an *entire paragraph* devoted to what Jason was wearing, there is no mention of what *I* was wearing, even though my outfit included my very favorite black clogs with the silver flowers on them. Other than that, though, it's a great article and an accurate representation of what we do in Library Club.

Posted by adrienne at 04:30 PM | Comments (13)

May 26, 2009

Max and His Gats

So my younger godson, Max, is three now. In many ways, Max is scary-smart, but at this point in his life, he's not doing much with enunciation. The thing is that Max would much rather put his time into riding his bike and taking apart the remote control. If he wasn't so short, I'd be worried about him taking off in the car one day. He's that kind of kid.

Anyway, due to Max's busy schedule, he's developed a number of speech habits that are pretty funny. My current favorite is "gat," which is what he calls cats. So the other day he came running into my house exclaiming, "Adren, 'ere are your GATS?" He also had fun playing with the gat toys and wondering where the gat food was.

Also, when he says "train tracks," it still kind of sounds like "brain box." I don't know what a brain box is, but I think I want one.

Posted by adrienne at 07:21 AM | Comments (6)

May 25, 2009

"I Saw Something Nasty in the Woodshed"

When I bought my house eight years ago, the shed was listed "as is." That's because it was starting to rot.

And it's still out back there, rotting away.

Sadly, I have to do something about it, and the something I've decided to do is take it down. The first step, however, is cleaning it out. I don't have much in the shed anymore, partly because I'm afraid to go in there as it has become a bit of a wildlife refuge with a family of birds and a little bitty squirrel and also, I suspect, bugs. These bugs are not cute little ladybugs, either. They are the kinds of bugs that live in dark, dank places that no one wants to go.

Anyway, two of the biggest things in the shed are these two bikes that have just been sitting doing nothing for years now, but I've found someone who would like to take them. I am meeting this person tomorrow, in fact, after assuring her that of course I could fit those bikes in my car.

I was forgetting how many points I lost on the spatial relations portion of my SATs.

So today was moving along and I thought, "Oh, yeah, I have to put the bikes in my car."

The bikes were in the back of the shed. I had to go there not once. But twice. The first time, I had to jump up and down in the open doorway for a while to get ready to RUN, and then once I had the bike back out in the open air, I dropped it and shuddered for a while. I repeated this process for the second bike.

Then I had to try to get the bikes in my car. My Honda Civic. After spending fifteen minutes figuring out how to fold down the back seat, I realized I had a problem. What a smart girl would have done at this point is call Tammy and beg for help in the form of her bringing over her truck, but no. It seems like I have to ask for help with so many things. I decided I was going to figure this out myself. Thus began the forty-five minute adventure of putting two bikes in my car. I got grease all over myself and the car, and I had to take one of the wheels off one of the bikes, but, eventually, they were both in there and I was able to shut all the doors and the trunk. I admired my accomplishment for a bit, and then I went to get a paper towel to wipe off my sticky hands-hands that were sticky, I realized, with blood, on account of the way I somehow managed to scrape all the skin off the side of one knuckle.

Now here I am. I still have some dirt caked under my fingernails and my knuckle is all bandaged up with my favorite Peanuts band-aids. I am one step closer to getting rid of the shed. And I have no idea how I am getting those bikes out of my car tomorrow. I believe I will be begging for help.

Posted by adrienne at 06:04 PM | Comments (15)

May 13, 2009

Remember to Smile

Today I finally watched one of the two storytimes we taped this past November to air on the public access station in Webster and which have been running every Saturday morning at 9:30 for months now. I've had quite a number of people tell me how much they've enjoyed the storytimes-sometimes they tell me they've taped them or they say to their children, "Look! It's Miss A! Remember her from the TV?"

I've found this somewhat disconcerting given that I hadn't seen either of the storytimes myself and generally prefer not to think about them. I seldom consent to be taped for anything, and when I encounter one of the few recordings of myself that are out there, I react like I'm watching a really scary movie. I cover my eyes, plug my ears, and maybe run from the room. I think what made me sit and watch today was the fact that I couldn't stand not knowing what other people were seeing.

It wasn't nearly as horrifying as I expected.

I expected to be preoccupied with my voice or how I looked or if I did something people might make fun of, but what captured my attention was how darned cheerful I was. I seemed friendly and relaxed and like I was having a fantastic time-which I was if by "having a fantastic time" you mean "barely suppressing the stress-induced nausea." The entire time we were taping, I kept a loop of "Remember to smile. Remember to smile. Remember to smile." running in the back of my mind. I wouldn't have thought smiles I had to tell myself to make could look so genuine.

Far from horrifying me, watching the recording was kind of encouraging. I liked the way I came across. I realized, too, that I can fool people. I remember when we taped thinking that I did an okay job but that probably my nervousness was going to be glaringly obvious, but it wasn't. I'm not sure this makes me all that much less nervous at the thought of watching the storytime I still haven't seen or the thought of the two storytimes we'll be taping to add to the rotation in a couple weeks. But I think it will be easier to remember to smile. It will at least seem worth the effort.

Posted by adrienne at 09:00 PM | Comments (6)

May 08, 2009

Poetrylike Friday: MC Lars at the Lilac Festival TONIGHT!

"Hey, Ishmael, can I call you annoying?"

Posted by adrienne at 07:17 AM | Comments (3)

April 30, 2009

Spring Cleaning, the Saga Continues

There are two things that spark my energy to clean like nothing else-one is seeing an ant in the house, and the other is seeing a big spider in the house.

In the last week, I've seen both.

I am currently concentrating my cleaning efforts on dark spaces where I think big spiders might hide, which involves a lot of vacuuming behind things and under things. Mostly, I'm finding a lot of cat toys. I have visions of moving and cleaning behind the stove and refrigerator, which satisfies my need to clean out dark spaces while also helping to ensure that I am denying the ants any reason to come in. Of course, I'm also defying logic, as the one ant I've seen was wandering around in the upstairs bathroom.

If I go, say, a week without seeing an ant or big spider, I'm sure I will forget all about this cleaning and go back to my previously scheduled disinterest in what's going on behind the refrigerator, especially given that I do not have enough metachlorians to even consider moving the refrigerator by myself.

Posted by adrienne at 06:55 AM | Comments (4)

April 28, 2009

Spring Cleaning, the Prequel

This past weekend, I started one of my favorite rituals of spring, cleaning the windows. I have approximately five million windows in my house. When you are someone who needs a lot of light and are looking at houses, this seems like a fine selling point, but, later, when you're washing the windows, it seems less so. The cats and I can't give up the sunshine and fresh air, though, and washing the windows has always seemed like one of the best ways to let the sun know I appreciate its return in the spring.

Of course, because my windows are legion, I either need to devote an entire day to washing them or parts of several days. This year, I'm devoting parts of several days. So far, I've done all the windows on the main floor and a couple on the bottom floor. Four more windows on the bottom floor, six more upstairs, and I'm done.

You can wash your windows much more quickly if you do a bad job, but since this is something it only makes sense to do about once a year, you might as well do it right, and washing windows starts with a vacuum cleaner. I use the brush attachment to vacuum the screens as well as the window sills, sashes, jams, and etc. Then I use an all-purpose cleaner and LOTS of cloths to clean all the non-glass parts of the window, especially the sill, which, if you're like me and clean the windows once a year, is probably filthy.

Now that everything AROUND the window is clean, you can focus on the glass. My favorite glass cleaner is the one I learned about in one of my favorite books, Green Up Your Cleanup by Jill Potvin Schoff. It's one part water to one part distilled white vinegar with some drops of essential oil so it smells prettier. I use lavender oil with the idea that it might help calm me down if I see something nasty in the window jams. Anyway, every cleaning guide worth anything that I've ever read recommends spraying or sponging the cleaner onto the window (I used to sponge, but now I spray-Heloise is the one who got me started on the bucket, but even she's come around to the spray bottle) and then using a squeegee to wipe it off. If you can make the squeegee work for you, rock on. I seem to be squeegee-impaired and can only get good results with newspaper.

Which reminds me, DO NOT USE PAPER TOWELS TO WASH YOUR WINDOWS. It's expensive, wasteful, unnecessary, and leaves a bunch of little paper blots all over the place. Newspaper works just fine, although I recommend wearing some gloves when you're using it, otherwise you will have newsprint all around your fingernails for a couple days. If you don't mind that, though, use your bare hands. You aren't using any chemicals that are going to hurt you, after all.

When you're done with the windows, maybe you can find a little energy to tackle the closets. Or maybe you'll just want to sit and stare at your nice, clean windows with a lemonade or a beer and something you cooked on the grill. There's a right choice there and a wrong one, but I'll let you be the final judge.

Book mentioned:
Schoff, Jill Potvin. Green Up Your Cleanup. Upper Saddle River, NJ: Creative Homeowner, 2008. (SPIRAL: 9781580113953)

Posted by adrienne at 09:49 AM | Comments (8)

April 27, 2009

Spring Cleaning

I had this kick-ass day at work today where I cleaned off the floor in my office. This is saying something: a large factor in my decision to do something about the floor was my increasing concern that someone was going to seriously injure themselves in there when they were delivering me a memo or whatever.

All high on success, my big plan for the evening was to enjoy the tail end of yet another beautiful summerlike day by mowing the lawn.

So I get home and change and head out to the garage. The mower was kind of buried, so I unburied it. The handle was kind of unscrewed, so I screwed it back in. I was feeling really darned competent. Anyway, I saw the gas tank was empty, and when I went to fill it I found that the gas can was empty, too. So I closed up the garage and went to the gas station, got some gas, and came back home.

That's when I put the gas in the tank and it poured all over the floor of my garage, on account of the way the gas line was disconnected.

To review, I spent an hour-and-a-half attempting to mow my lawn, but all I really managed to do is absorb the smell of gas. My cats won't even stay in the same room with me. When I came in from the garage, Ella kind of pointedly smelled the air and then went and hid under the couch downstairs.

I think I'll just go ahead and spend of the rest of the evening focusing on tasks I am confident in my ability to accomplish, namely reading a book, watching 30 Rock, and then going to bed.

Posted by adrienne at 07:29 PM | Comments (6)

April 26, 2009

You Know When You've Had Just a Little Too Much Sun and You've Been Running Around and You're Tired?

Isn't that the best?

Posted by adrienne at 07:06 PM | Comments (6)

April 21, 2009

"But Here on Earth There'd Be No Life Without the Light It Gives"

Unlike, it seems, 99.9% of the population of the United States, I like to sleep with the curtains in my bedroom open. I don't know why anyone does anything different. I have my bed situated so that if it's a sunny day, the sun wakes me up in the morning, because after a long winter, if we're going to have a sunny day, I want to be the first to know about it. Today, for instance, they were forecasting the same rainy cold day we had yesterday, but right now it's blue skies and sun, sun, sun as far as I can see. It's got to be a good day, right?

Posted by adrienne at 07:57 AM | Comments (7)

April 15, 2009

Why After a Year-and-a-Half I Have Decided I ♥ My Allergy Shots, or My Transformation into ROACH GIRL is Complete

So a year-and-a-half ago, I started weekly allergy shots. I didn’t write about them much once they got going because they were uniformly depressing. I got one shot in each arm every week, and, invariably, one of my arms would swell up and be sore for two days, and it was really no fun. As a bonus, I didn’t even notice my allergies getting better. My allergist and I agreed that our goals with these shots were twofold: to get me off one of my allergy medicines and to improve my general quality of life. At my one-year checkup, I was still on two allergy medications and noticing no difference in anything.

In sharp contrast, once my allergist got over the disappointment that my cats hadn’t died since I’d last seen him (“How are those cats, Adrienne? Still in good health? Oh, too bad.” As if I wouldn’t get a new cat, anyway, Dr. Q. Bah.), he was thrilled with my progress. When you’re asthmatic, doctors give you something called a pulmonary function test every single chance they get. It basically measures how well you breathe. I have years’ worth of them on record, and I was forever flunking them. Perhaps you’ve been led to believe that breathing is an autonomic function, but I can tell you from a great deal of experience that when you flunk one of these tests, the doctors and nurses all cluck their tongues and make you do it again, encouraging you to TRY HARDER, as if you are breathing poorly on purpose. Anyway, at that one-year visit, I, for the very first time, passed my pulmonary function test.

Dr. Q was so pleased about this development that he decided to bump me down to getting a shot every two weeks instead of every week. I was skeptical about how well this was going to work out for me allergy-wise, but I was really okay with the prospect of having to deal with my arm swelling up once every two weeks instead of once a week, so I agreed to this plan. Dr. Q must not have been as confident as he sounded, though, because he decided he needed to see me again in four months.

Well, four months was in January. My pulmonary function test was again improved, and something else odd had happened. When I was on my trip to California in January, I didn’t have to take Benadryl even once. You see, even though I have been on two allergy medications on a daily basis for years, when I travel, I’ve always needed to take a third—Benadryl—to get through sleeping in hotels. Dr. Q says this is partly because of my dust allergy but way more due to my roach allergy (which is gross). Dr. Q’s a serious sort, but he was practically bouncing up and down at this news, and he decided to move me to once-every-three-weeks shots. I found myself once again skeptical but also unwilling to argue the counterpoint.

Since then, I’ve decided that Dr. Q is freaking brilliant. A few weeks ago, I tried going off my second medication (again), and I’ve been fine—in early spring, one of the most difficult times of year for almost anyone with allergies. What’s more, yesterday I went to visit my eye doctor, and he said the undersides of my eyelids (an area that gets red and blotchy-looking pretty quick if you have any kind of allergy thing going on) looked better than he’d ever seen them, “almost like you don’t have allergies. Are you on a new medication?”

SCORE!

This is some kind of lesson in the value of tenacity or maybe listening to health professionals or whatever. All I really care about is the fact that I haven’t had to use my inhaler in a month. Rock on, medical science!

Posted by adrienne at 09:48 AM | Comments (7)

April 13, 2009

So Much for Being Brave

I was a regular walker in my neighborhood for at least a year and a half before I moved into it. Before, I lived in a townhouse in an adjacent neighborhood and would walk here a lot because I liked the winding streets and tall trees. My late husband and I found this house when we were out on an early spring walk, in fact, and I’ve been living here ever since.

Now, of course, it’s early spring and the snow has melted and I am out walking again. One of the nice things about walking around your neighborhood is that you get to know your neighbors, at least by sight. One of my favorite neighbors has always been a guy who lives around the corner. He’s operating some kind of business out of his garage, and he has always had a couple dogs. One day years ago, I was walking by when he was out with the pooper scooper cleaning up the front yard, and he looked up at me and said, “Every day, it’s the same old shit.”

That’s when I decided I really liked him.

That’s also when I got to know his dogs. Dogs make me nervous. I got bit by one when I was a preschooler, and it was kind of a big brouhaha, and I think I’ve just never gotten over it. I don’t mind dogs I know, though, and his dogs were aging when I first met them. They’d bark at me, but I learned he had invisible fencing and that all they really wanted me to do was walk up to the fence line and pet them, which I did.

Last year, the dogs were gone. They were old, and I was sure they died, but I never really talked to my neighbor about it. He wasn’t outside as much.

This year, I was glad to see that he has two new dogs. Of course, by “glad” I mean, “happy for him but also slightly terrified.” These dogs are big and young and exuberant. They start barking when I’m still three houses away.

Now here’s the thing. I haven’t yet seen my neighbor when I’m walking by and the dogs are out, so the dogs and I have not been formally introduced. I know in my head that they MUST have invisible fencing because they aren’t on leashes and we have leash laws and the other dogs had invisible fencing besides, but I cannot make myself walk by those dogs on their side of the road. Yesterday I was out, and they were out by themselves barking like maniacs again. I tried to tell myself that they have the fence. I tried to tell myself to just keep walking by. But I had to cross the street. I don’t even know why crossing the street makes me feel safer, but it does.

In the ten years I’ve been walking around this neighborhood, my husband’s cancer relapsed, we went through a few years of treatment, he died in my living room, I figured out how to keep my house, I wrote a book, I bought a car. I conquered my fear of heights so I could take care of the gutters. I traveled all over the United States. I’ve climbed mountains (small ones, but still). I’ve driven in LA. I’ve talked in front of rooms full of people I don’t know. What defeats me? My neighbor’s dogs. Who I know darned well can’t hurt me.

Sorry, Eleanor. I’ll keep working on it.

Posted by adrienne at 07:53 AM | Comments (15)

April 07, 2009

Cinnamon Toast

Lucas subsists on a diet mostly comprised of the few things I avoid—hot dogs, bologna, chicken nuggets, and snack foods that come in bags. I have a hard time with this, partly because I’m concerned about what a diet like this is going to mean for his health and well-being in the long term, but mostly because I just don’t understand not eating a wide variety of foods. It’s a personality thing. Lucas is not by nature a risk-taker. He seems to think that if he tries a new food and doesn’t like it, the world will end. He also seems to believe that he is biologically incapable of eating a food he doesn’t love entirely, which leads to these spectacularly dramatic scenes of gagging when his mother insists he try at least one bite of whatever she’s made for dinner.

Lucky for me, I get Lucas for the one meal a day he really seems to love, breakfast. I love breakfast, too, so we have all manner of wonderful things—yogurt-and-fruit smoothies, pancakes, muffins, breads, grapefruit. I make all the pancakes and breads, so I pack them with good things, like whole wheat flour and fruit. One of Lucas’s specially favorite breakfasts is cinnamon toast, which, in case you are some sad person who doesn’t know, is toast with butter and cinnamon and sugar sprinkled on top. A couple months ago, Lucas had a rare moment of culinary daring and suggested that we try topping our cinnamon toast with some of the peach jam Tammy and I put up in the fall. This was such a good idea, and now it’s how we always eat our cinnamon toast. Just when I thought cinnamon toast could not get any better, when Lucas asked for cinnamon toast this morning, I realized that I only had apple walnut bread in the house. I asked him if he wanted to try it, and he said yes, and boy I’m glad he did, because toasted apple walnut bread topped with butter and cinnamon (you can really skip the sugar here) and peach jam is freaking awesome. Highly recommended.

Posted by adrienne at 09:30 AM | Comments (15)

March 22, 2009

Benny Actively Engaged

My plot to keep Benny from waking me up at night is working!

At first when I started feeding the birds again, I was disappointed because so few were coming to eat. After about two weeks, though, I started seeing more traffic, and this morning when I looked over Benny's shoulder to see what he was seeing, I saw two blue jays, a cardinal, a bunch of chickadees, a squirrel, and a rabbit. I've been frightening rabbits, squirrels, and chipmunks pretty much every day when I go to refill the feeder. (They aren't getting into the feeder, by the way, since a few years ago, I invested in a feeder that foils them, but they do like to eat the seeds the birds drop, which is fine with me.) Benny is thrilled with all this activity. He has two favorite windows for watching everything that's going on. Occasionally, he goes into Wild Kitty mode and runs between them like he's chasing something.

Of course, if I see Benny sleeping during the day, I'm still waking him up and trying to get him to play. My father-in-law helps with this when he stops by, too.

The side benefit here is that my older cat, Ella, is also enjoying the activity in the yard. She's never been prone to waking me up at night, but she does sleep too much, so this is good.

And, okay, I also like watching the birds out the window. Why did I ever stop feeding them?

Posted by adrienne at 10:01 AM | Comments (11)

March 17, 2009

“Does Not Happen”

“Reality so often fails when it comes to small, satisfying details, she thought.”
- Nation by Terry Pratchett

Lately, I’ve been reading the much-discussed-and-awarded Nation by Terry Pratchett. I’ve never met a Pratchett novel I didn’t enjoy, but this one has grown particularly dear to me. It’s the story of Mau, the only person left alive in his community when a tidal wave tears through the island chain he and his people call home. As Mau tries to cope with the devastation and then reluctantly takes on a leadership role when survivors from other communities start congregating on his island, he decides that no one else is going to die. He develops a mantra: “does not happen.” He mutters this mantra to himself over and over whenever he feels he has to defy the god of death, a god he’s decided isn’t so all-powerful after all. The opposite of “does not happen,” of course, is what does, and that is what Mau is really clinging to. In the face of despair, some people give up. Some, like Mau, take comfort in the notion that while they clearly can’t control everything, they can control some things—and darn it, that’s what they’re going to do.

(It isn’t a leap to see the parallel to a novelist who decides to keep writing in the face of a devastating degenerative disease, is it? Talk about being brave.)

I bring this up because I bought a dishwasher today. Maybe this is a small thing in your world, but, in mine, this is the first major appliance I’ve bought in a decade. It won’t be delivered until next week, but I felt so good just walking out of Sears with my receipt. When my late husband was first ill, I told myself everything would work out. When it became clear to me that everything was NOT going to work out, I started singing myself a new song, a version of “does not happen” that I like to call “I’ll figure it out.” This has been especially true of my house, which is a place I love but also something a little out of my league. I’ve panicked a lot through the years; I’ve had days where I thought I should just sell it and move into an apartment. But what I keep telling myself is that if I keep working hard and moving forward, I’ll figure it out. The dishwasher in this house sucked the day we moved in here (eight years ago now?). Replacing it myself with money I earned feels like hope. It feels like a step in the right direction. Maybe it will all be okay after all.

If not? I’ll figure it out. That’s what happens.

Books mentioned:
Pratchett, Terry. Nation. NY: HarperCollins, 2008. (LIB: 9780061433023, HC: 9780061433016)

Posted by adrienne at 09:55 PM | Comments (12)

March 15, 2009

Remember Back When He Used to Be Small?

He's starting to look like a teenager with those headphones on all the time.

Posted by adrienne at 07:41 PM | Comments (8)

March 05, 2009

Another Tour of California

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I get on the plane tomorrow afternoon.

Posted by adrienne at 09:35 PM | Comments (8)

February 27, 2009

“Although You Can’t See It, You Know They Are Smiling,” or Why You May Not Want to Forget to Feed the Birds

I haven’t been blogging every day for quite some time now, but this last week or so, I’ve really let things slip. I blame sleep deprivation. My younger cat, Benny, has taken to waking me up every couple hours at night to ask me to pet him or turn on a water faucet or feed him. My theory is that he’s experiencing the same blahs the humans get around these parts in February. The days are somewhat relentlessly snowy and cold and dark, and Benny’s favorite recreational activity—aside from checking out his forts, which he does quite religiously at least twice a day—is watching what’s going on in the Not House. Benny doesn’t want to go into the Not House, but he thinks it’s fun to watch the birds and squirrels and whatever else is running around out there. Unfortunately, in February there isn’t a whole lot going on animal-wise in the Not House, especially when the resident human neglects to put birdseed in the feeders for a few months.

Basically, I think Benny’s bored.

I’ve taken several steps to try to combat The Sleeping Problem:

Step #1: I used to give Benny two scoops of food in the morning and two at night. Now I give him ONE in the morning and THREE at night. Of course, I have to *pretend* to give him two scoops in the morning, but what I really give him is two half-scoops. Anyway, with three scoops of food at night, he’s more full and less likely to crab at me about that particular issue.

Step #2: I’ve also been making an extra effort to make sure he spends time playing volleymouse every day. If you’ve never played volleymouse, this is when you throw a toy mouse high in the air, and the cat spikes it down to the ground. Benny is a good jumper, and he loves this game. He loves it so much that sometimes after he spikes the mouse, he picks it up in his mouth and brings it to me to throw again, which is really more like fetch, but I wouldn’t mention that to Benny if I were you.

Step #3: When I see Benny sleeping during the day, I wake him up. SEE HOW IT FEELS, BENNY? SEE??? IT’S NO FUN WHEN SOMEONE DOES IT TO YOU, IS IT???

*ahem*

Step #4: I’m filling the bird feeders every day again.

Last night, Benny only woke me up once, which is reasonable. I am not sure I’ve ever slept eight hours without waking up at least once on my own. We’ll see how tonight goes.

Posted by adrienne at 10:20 PM | Comments (10)

February 19, 2009

You. Me. Dark Side. Now.

Posted by adrienne at 10:19 AM | Comments (10)

February 04, 2009

Anniversaries and Surprises

This past weekend, I spent an evening with friends, having dinner and playing games. I also got to spend some time with my friends’ kids, who I don’t see nearly enough. They are precious to me for a lot of reasons, one of which is because their daughter, Kate, was born not quite two weeks before my husband died, a little spot of happiness in a dark time.

Today, Kate is four and a half, energetic and bright. She was upstairs when I got there on Saturday, and she bopped down and up the stairs a few times before she settled on down and presented me with a card. An index card, to be exact, decorated with Christmas stickers. While I was exclaiming over the different stickers the way I do when children give me this sort of thing, Kate sidled over to her mother and whispered in her ear.

I gave her mother the eyebrow what.

“She says she wrote you a message on the back.”

So I flipped the card and, indeed, there were lines, scrawls that reminded me of the very best writing Max knew in Bunny Cakes by Rosemary Wells.

“Will you read it for me?” I asked Kate.

“I can’t,” said Kate, one hand in front of her mouth. “It’s a surprise.”

Hanging out with this child who is as old as my grief, it’s hard not to feel like Kate’s done a little more with her time than I have. She’s learned to walk and talk and write her name and give guests nice gifts when they come to her house. She beat me at BINGO. She’s also arguably better at the Disney trivia game than I am. Most of the time, I feel like I’m just starting to get the hang of daily life, simple stuff, like getting up in the morning. That’s the thing about kids, though, one of the reasons I work with them—they are a constant reminder of everything that’s possible in this world. And so I’m keeping that index card pinned up next to my desk now, scrawl side out.

So I don’t forget.

Posted by adrienne at 10:40 PM | Comments (8)

January 30, 2009

The Book as Meditation

My recent trip to California was probably the best trip I’ve ever taken in my life. Everything went perfectly: I was so independent and competent, I saw amazing and interesting things, and I got to spend time with two of my favorite people in the whole wide world.

Truly, though, I have got to be done with all this traveling soon.

I notice that since I’ve gotten back from California, I seem to lapse into ennui every time I get off the couch. And what have I been doing on that couch? Reading. Reading and reading and reading. And reading. I haven’t even been writing. All I want to do is read.

At least part of what keeps me on the couch is the fact that the books have been so interesting. A smattering:

The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
People have been telling me to read this for months. Part of me wishes I’d gotten to it sooner, and part of me wishes I’d waited longer so I wouldn’t have to wait so long until part two of this planned trilogy is released in September. Collins has given us a post-apocalyptic science fiction novel of the highest caliber, using a brand-new world to talk about all the problems in the one we currently inhabit. And, whatever, the website’s kind of awesome.

Wintergirls by Laurie Halse Anderson (advance reader’s copy)
This is not your average teen problem novel about eating disorders. No, what Anderson has given us is intense and disturbing—and I couldn’t put it down, although I debated not finishing it more than once. That would, of course, have involved leaving the couch, though, so it really wasn’t much of an option.

Cold Comfort Farm by Stella Gibbons
I have long loved this movie, so I’m kind of surprised how long it took me to get around to reading the book. It made me laugh and laugh and laugh so much that I got to the end and read it through again.

The New York Times Easy Crossword Puzzles, Volume 7, edited by Will Shortz
I was complaining about this book of crossword puzzles to someone recently, and he was all like, “What’s the difference? A crossword puzzle’s a crossword puzzle.” I just shook my head and pitied him. I have to acknowledge that the Monday puzzles are kind of brain candy for me at this point, but every time I think that one kicks my butt. Besides, I like Mondays. My favorite in this collection is one that plays around anagramming “post.” I’d tell you the puzzle’s title, but I don’t know what it is on account of this volume doesn’t include any of the puzzles’ titles, which I find irritating. I mean, when did that become optional?

Posted by adrienne at 08:07 PM | Comments (19)

January 10, 2009

These Aren’t the Exact Routes I’ll Be Taking, But This Does Indicate Every Place I’ll Be Stopping Between Today and Next Thursday

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January 09, 2009

One of These Things is Not Like the Others

No, one of these things is not the same.

Posted by adrienne at 05:41 PM | Comments (4)

January 03, 2009

Desperately Seeking Ambidexterity

One of the things I love about being single is how challenging it can be. I have a lot of support from a lot of people—otherwise goodness knows where I’d be right now—but, still, I find myself in a lot of situations I’m not quite ready for, where I have to figure things out and cope or admit I’m not up to the task and give up.

I’m not much for giving up.

This can be tiring, but figuring out how to do things I didn’t know I could do has also kept me hopeful. In the early days of my widowhood, the logic went something like if I could figure out how to clean out the gutters, I could probably figure out some way to deal with my grief. Now this helps me walk around feeling like I can cope with whatever I have to cope with, and that’s a good way to live.

Since I got burned earlier this week, though, I can’t help but notice that the one thing I can’t seem to figure out how to do is to bandage my own right forearm. You would think after a week of changing the dressing 3-4 times a day, I might be getting better at it. Sometimes I think I’m getting worse. It is beyond all reason the way my left hand refuses to do what I tell it to. I cannot, for instance, teach it how to use scissors, so when I have to cut the roll of gauze—again, let’s remember, 3-4 times a day—I try and try cutting it with my left hand and then finally give up and let my right hand do it—awkwardly, of course, since the bandage is, essentially, on my right wrist, but it gets done. I guess this is partly because scissors are made for right-handed people, and so now I’m beginning to appreciate why left-handed people have their own stores. (No, really, I saw one in San Francisco.) I am not quite ready to give way to despair, but that’s only because I’ve found a coping mechanism, which is that I will take every opportunity when I’m out-and-about to have someone rewrap my bandage more securely for me. The trade-off is that whoever’s helping me rewrap gets to see my burn, which some of my (crazy) friends seem quite eager to do. I haven’t hit up any strangers yet—other than medical personnel—but you never know. Luckily, the darned thing is finally starting to heal, so I’m down to rebandaging twice a day.

I am hoping this is a problem I won’t be running into again.

Posted by adrienne at 11:23 PM | Comments (8)

January 01, 2009

My New New Year’s Resolutions

So I’ve been using the same New Year’s resolutions for about three years now. I don’t want to knock them—they’re good resolutions—but I think I’m going to write some new ones for 2009:

1. Grow new skin back on my forearm. When I go to bed every night, it is with the wild hope that maybe I will wake up the next morning with nice, happy new skin. This has not worked out for me. Yet.
2. Travel less. I have three trips to California planned in the next four months, so I can’t really start working on this one until May. It is going to be hard not to plan more trips for the rest of the year, but I seriously need more time at home.
3. Pay off my student loans. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.
4. Read every day.
5. Write every day.
6. Get off the couch every once in a while to exercise.

Okay, so there are fewer resolutions than I had before, but they are also slightly more ambitious, especially numbers 2 and 3. Make that double for 3.

Thanks for all the well-wishes, by the way—for my burn earlier this week, for my cold the other week, for all the general encouragement and support I find here almost every day. I hope 2009 proves to be an excellent year for all of you.

Posted by adrienne at 09:35 PM | Comments (9)

December 29, 2008

Proof that Practice Doesn’t Always Make Perfect

When I was in high school and college, I worked in the food service industry—specifically, I made chicken wings in a pizzeria and then worked for several years at McDonald’s, which remains the second-longest job I’ve ever held.

Food service isn’t a particularly good career choice for someone with a mind that has a tendency to wander. My skin isn’t prone to scarring, and so most of the evidence of this has faded through time, but I sustained so many burns in my food service years—and, truly, the years since—that I know almost as much about burns as I do about preparing food. For instance, I can tell you that burns come in three types:

First Degree
Hurt like heck for a day, but then you forget you have them.

Second Degree
You feel that fast HOT that makes you get your skin off whatever’s burning it, and then it stops hurting right away. Your skin just feels kind of wet. A few minutes later, though, you’ll notice your skin changing color, and just when you start to worry about it, the REAL pain hits you and WOO BOY that is going to get worse for the next few hours, so good luck.

Third Degree
You definitely notice these when they’re happening, as they generally involve open flame, open flame that is quite often attached to your person, which is, I imagine, pretty hard to ignore. I’ve only had one third degree burn. It was small and the result of direct contact with an oven that was, I think, about 600 degrees. The burn got infected, which made my doctor prescribe penicillin, which is when my body decided that penicillin would be an excellent new allergy to acquire. As an experience, I wouldn’t recommend it. That burn took about three months to heal.

So last night I was making soup and took the lid off the pot and I don’t know how it happened but the next thing I knew that lid was HOT on my arm. I looked at my arm, though, and thought, “Eh, doesn’t hurt. It’s fine.” Then a few minutes later my skin started to change color, and I thought, “Crap.”

Then it hurt.

The burn is certainly the largest I’ve ever had, from just below my wrist to a couple inches shy of my elbow, on that soft, lily-white skin on the inside of my forearm. I tried to move my arm as little as possible until this morning, when I called the doctor’s office to beg for drugs. The conversation went like this:

Me: Hi, I have a second-degree burn. Can I get a prescription for that good burn cream stuff?
Doctor’s Office: Does it hurt?
Me: Yeah.
Doctor’s Office: Well, you’re going to have to come in so the doctor can look at it.
Me: Really? How about the PA?
Doctor’s Office: No, the doctor. Come in at 11:00.
Me: Okay.

Fast-forward to 11:00 at the doctor’s office:

Nurse: Is Aid-reen Furn-ass here?
Me: That’s me! I have a second-degree burn. Can I get a prescription for that good burn cream stuff?
Nurse: Can I see?
Me: Sure.
Nurse: Wow, that looks like it hurts.
Me: Yeah, it does.
Nurse: The doctor’s going to have to look at it.
Me: Sigh.

Fast-forward to 11:50, still at the doctor’s office:

Doctor: So what brings you in today, Mrs. Furness?
Me: I have a second-degree burn. Can I please get a prescription for some burn cream?
Doctor: Oh, yeah, that is a second-degree burn. Bet it hurts.
Me: Yes, it does.
Doctor: Let me write you a prescription.

That burn cream is awesome, let me tell you, and completely worth the trouble I went through to get it. And the experience is a good reminder of all kinds of important things—like that I suck at multitasking and I’m glad I don’t work in food service anymore and, really, it’s a good thing that I don’t know how to use a power saw—but, like so many character-builders, I could have done without it.

Posted by adrienne at 07:51 PM | Comments (13)

December 24, 2008

As If You’re Doing Anything More Exciting this Christmas…

One of the birthday presents I was most excited about this year was this one from Olivia and Sabrina, the Crossword Puzzle Puzzle:

Look at it in all its nerdy glory. I’ve been working on it while listening to The Princess Diaries IV, which is a match made in heaven, if you ask me. The Puzzle Puzzle even comes with a dry-erase marker and clues, so once I’m done putting the puzzle together, I can solve the crossword. My goal is to finish listening to all the Princess Diaries books before book ten, Forever Princess, comes out on January 6th and to finish the Puzzle Puzzle before 2009. I have my doubts about The Princess Diaries, which is okay because it’s not like I haven’t read them all before, but I think I may just make it with the Puzzle Puzzle.

Posted by adrienne at 02:18 PM | Comments (5)

December 18, 2008

Quotable Thursday

“You see, whenever I start feeling sick, I just stop being sick and be awesome instead.”
-Barney in “How Lilly Stole Christmas,” How I Met Your Mother, Season 2

I went to bed last night telling myself that I would wake up awesome instead of sick this morning, but I woke up sick. Whatever happened to my Immune System of Steel? I’m blaming Lucas, who has been coughing nonstop for two weeks, although I suppose it could have been any of the whippersnappers who are forever in the library coughing and sneezing. And, on the bright side, Lucas felt badly enough for me this morning that he dried my dishes and put away the ones that went in cupboards he could reach. He’s an awfully good egg, that kid.

As for me? I think it’s time to crawl back to the couch and nap again.

Posted by adrienne at 10:08 AM | Comments (12)

December 11, 2008

35

According to Wikipedia: “35 is the highest number one can count to on one’s fingers using base 6.”

How bad is it that I am 35 and there is a way to count on my fingers that I do not understand? I only know how to count to ten on my fingers. Ah, well, there’s always 36 next year.

Posted by adrienne at 08:20 AM | Comments (16)

December 08, 2008

Another View

I am home now. It is sunny, but it is also 27 degrees.

Let us not speak of it.

On Saturday, I went back to Telegraph Hill and Coit Tower. I seem to find the parrots endlessly amusing, and I wanted to try the staircase I hadn’t the first time I was there. (I walked the Greenwich stairs on Friday, the Filbert on Saturday.) The walk and the views are an antidote to the monochromatic winter we’ve settled into here in WNY; if I had been there another day, I might have gone back again.

I also kind of fell in love with the WPA murals in the tower. The murals are worth spending time with, full of activity and detail, and it’s moving to stand in the midst of a financial crisis mulling over the way our country decided that one good way to deal with a past crisis was to put artists to work. We aren’t that country anymore, and those murals tell a story about why that’s a shame.

On Saturday, I also rode the F train and did some shopping and spent some quality time at City Lights bookstore. I walked a lot.

Today, I am doing laundry. Sigh. Let us not speak of it.

Posted by adrienne at 03:06 PM | Comments (7)

December 05, 2008

San Francisco, Coffee, and Sunshine

When you live in WNY, it takes a while to notice the way the sun has forsaken you. I mean, I knew it was getting dark early at home, but I always think of January and February as being the truly dark months. Most people put their Christmas lights up at home around Thanksgiving; I think they fool us into thinking there is more light than there truly is, at least for a while.

Here in San Francisco, though, there is sun. Lots and lots and lots of sun. There are also coffee places every block or two, including one right across the street from my hotel. This morning, I ran across the street in the morning twilight in my pajamas to get my large peppermint latte. I’m prone to dashing around in my pajamas from time-to-time at home, but here it seems like a way more normal thing to do.

So there is coffee, there is sun, and the workshop I’ve been planning for and fretting about for months is successfully behind me. WOO HOO!

Today, I’m riding the cable cars. I’m going to eat breakfast in that place Jeffrey told me about. I’m going to see some parrots. Maybe I’ll even see some seals.

I love being here.

Posted by adrienne at 10:26 AM | Comments (10)

November 30, 2008

Documentaries that Have Helped Me Realize that I’m Not So Abnormal After All, Part 2 in a Continuing Series

Over a year ago now, I wrote an entry about documentaries I’d seen and enjoyed primarily because the people in them were perhaps more eccentric than myself. I really like this in people, and I have continued to pursue more documentaries in this vein. I thought it was time to add a Part 2 to my list. Here goes:

The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters
Let me just say that Billy Mitchell is kind of the Wendy Pepper of videogaming, and Steve Wiebe is kind of my hero. After watching this documentary, I, too, wanted to put a Donkey Kong machine in my garage (or maybe my basement—I do live in the Northeast, and our winters are c-o-l-d). Plus, how bad do I want to visit Funspot now? It’s not even that far away. 4/5 jazz hands.

Helvetica
Typographers are weird and opinionated, and there is an amount of controversy in the world of fonts that I never would have guessed before watching this film. It made me think as much as it amused me. Got to love that. 3.5/5 jazz hands.

Vernon, Florida
This film was released in 1982, when I was in the second grade, but it’s a movie that could have been made yesterday, although I shudder to think what Vernon—a relatively rural place at the time this was made—might be like today (BOO overdevelopment). The film is only about an hour long and follows several people around town, basically just filming them while they talk and talk and talk. There isn’t a boring minute, and these people are (or were) all way crazier than me. 5/5 jazz hands.

Posted by adrienne at 11:13 PM | Comments (10)

November 27, 2008

You Know It Was a Happy Thanksgiving When You End the Day with All Ten Fingers (Mostly) Intact

Dinner was, I think, a success. Everyone pitched in and helped out, as they always do, and everyone ate. They laughed; they played the Wii (Thanks, O and S!). Several years ago, we made a Big Mistake on Thanksgiving and played Twister. Now Lucas believes that Twister is just what you DO on Thanksgiving, and we have to play it every year. So we did that, too. What with the yoga, I’ve always been a somewhat formidable Twister opponent, but this year I was having a tough time. I was feeling kind of badly about it, like maybe this was the result of my impending 35th birthday, but then I realized that it was probably because I a.) spent most of the day standing and cooking yesterday, and then b.) went to an hour-and-ten-minute-long spinning class this morning, and then c.) spent several more hours standing and cooking/cleaning up before the game. I think maybe my legs earned being a little sore and tired.

My most exciting Thanksgiving discovery was learning how to use the electric knife. My dad always used an electric knife to carve the turkey for all the years he was here for Thanksgiving, and the knife has been there in my kitchen for all the years since. I’ve been way too afraid to use it, though. To me, it looks an awful lot like a power saw without a power saw’s nifty safety features. And so for the last few years, I have done something to the turkey that could be loosely described as carving, producing pieces that are edible but not very slicelike.

This year, I decided I wanted slices. This year, I decided to try the electric knife.

The electric knife is AMAZING. Scary, but AMAZING. It was like I knew how to carve a turkey. There were slices and everything. Brilliant, brilliant.

Now, I think, it’s time to veg out on the couch and watch some TV. I hope you all had as happy a Thanksgiving as I did. I feel so thankful for all of you.

Posted by adrienne at 09:17 PM | Comments (8)

November 24, 2008

Thanksgiving Dinner: A How-to-Do-It Manual

If you are cooking Thanksgiving dinner, today is exactly the right time to panic, because if you don’t have a lot of preparations in place, you’re kind of screwed.

I am not going to be screwed. I’ve been cooking Thanksgiving dinners every year for about a decade now, and I daresay I’m getting good at it. For instance, I had today off work, and so I spent four hours driving around the city running errands and getting all the food I’ll need for the rest of the week, including the holiday. I accomplished this through the liberal use of post-its. I have one post-it that lists everything I plan to serve (turkey, gravy, squash, mashed potatoes, cranberry jelly, veggies with hummus, stuffing, homemade applesauce, this awesome cranberry-apple relish I made the other day, angel food cake, and pumpkin pie). I have another series of post-its that tell me what I need to do each day leading up to the holiday (Monday: take turkey out of freezer; Tuesday: make applesauce, take pumpkin out of freezer; Wednesday: take squash out of freezer, bake pumpkin pie, bake angel food cake, make hummus; Thursday: do everything else). This is maybe the most organized approach I’ve taken to anything ever.

The thing about Thanksgiving is that it’s a meal you don’t want to mess with. If people don’t get what they expect, their reactions will be swift and strong. For instance, personally, I think that serving people cranberry jelly that you slide out of the can and put out in slices on a plate is not nice, as it is barely even food, but at least two (2) people who regularly come to Thanksgiving at my house consider this an essential part of the holiday. The one year I didn’t serve it, I had multiple complaints. When I brought up the idea of maybe not baking a pumpkin pie this year with one of my guests, his reaction was silent horror; I could see him flipping through the rolodex in his head considering where else he could go for the meal. One year I cooked a ham instead of a turkey, and that was just a big mistake. A really, really big mistake. I’m using the folly of youth as my excuse on that one.

I’ve also tried various things to make the meal more healthy, which exactly no one appreciates. I purchased two (2) pounds of butter and two (2) dozen eggs today, most of which will be gone by Friday morning. Well, “redistributed” might be a better word, but, hey, it’s a holiday.

Another word of warning, from this morning on, the closer it gets to Thanksgiving, the more crowded and picked-over the grocery stores will be. Just *try* to find some decent celery on Wednesday afternoon; I dare you. It won’t happen.

Other mistakes I’ve made that you should probably try to avoid:

1. Forgetting to purchase and/or defrost your turkey.
2. Forgetting to make the stuffing until the turkey’s on the table.
3. Forgetting to take the ginormous green salad you’ve made out of the fridge when the meal starts and then not realizing it until the next day when you, one person, find yourself in possession of a day-old salad made to feed 15 people. (This error is what finally drove me to institute the post-it system.)

The irony? While I’m very well-prepared for the meal I will be serving this Thursday, I am completely unprepared for the trip I’m taking to San Francisco next week. I have a flight booked and dinner plans for the day I get in (Hi, Heidi!), and of course I’m fairly well-prepared for my workshop. What I’m doing with the rest of my time, though? No idea. Maybe I’ll get a chance to read my travel guides on the plane….

Posted by adrienne at 05:30 PM | Comments (20)

November 22, 2008

Everyday Things that Shouldn’t Be Scary, Except They Are

Hot Tea in Containers with Lids
About seven or eight years ago, I ordered tea at a coffee shop (NOT the Leaf and Bean, by the by), and when I took off the lid to take the bag out, water spilled on my hand and gave me a second-degree burn. Ever since this incident, I do not like tea in paper cups, tea in containers with lids on them, or walking around while holding tea in any kind of container. This feels completely rational to me.

The Yogurt Container in the Back of My Fridge
It may have been yogurt once; it may have been leftovers. It’s been in there so long that I have no idea what it could be, and I am afraid.

The Car Wash
I have been afraid of the car wash since I was a little kid, when I would insist on getting out of the car before it went in and walking around to wait on the other side. I’ve been through the car wash plenty of times since then—I even take my car there myself on a semi-regular basis—but I am still fairly convinced the big round brushes that clean the sides of the car are up to no good, so I just close my eyes during that part. Max, bless his little heart, shares my concern.

Making Phone Calls
Tammy calls people all the time like it’s no big deal, but I confine most of my phone use to calling her or one of my parents. I feel all awkward when I can’t see people I’m speaking to, which is, I think, related to the discomfort I feel when I’m being recorded or videotaped, as I do not like the thought of people who I can’t see seeing me. That’s rational, though. Isn’t it?

The Broiler
The broiler is just so dramatic. Turning it on always feels like a bit of an event, and I spend the whole time it’s on worrying that something (like what I’m cooking) is going to burst into flame.

Posted by adrienne at 08:32 PM | Comments (17)

November 18, 2008

The Deconstruction of Tom and Jerry

“Today,” says Lucas. “I am going to compare Benny to Tom.”

Pause.

“One thing I know is that they’re both, uh, well…not the smartest cats.”

Posted by adrienne at 07:59 AM | Comments (5)

November 17, 2008

What I’ve Been Eating Lately, Since We All Know My Life Revolves Around Food

Macaroni and Cheese
Because of my weekly produce deliveries, all of my meals over the last six months have in some way, shape, or form involved a fruit or vegetable. This past week was my last week of produce. I felt a little sad about it, so I decided to cheer myself up with something fatty and wonderful—and what could be more fatty and wonderful, more far from produce, than macaroni and cheese? I used a recipe I found in one of my Cook’s Illustrated magazines that I’d never tried before and that I think is now my Official Favorite.

Butternut Squash with Ginger, Pepper, and a Wee Pat of Butter
I’ve been eating this every single day for the last week, and it is not getting old.

No-Mayo Cole Slaw
I have a conflicted relationship with cabbage that stems from the seasons in which they’d plant cabbage in the fields surrounding my house when I was a child. If you’ve never had to endure months of smelling rotting cabbage, then you may not understand why sauerkraut is one of the very few foods in this world I avoid. It’s a smell you don’t get used to. So, anyway, I’d never made anything much with cabbage, but I got a couple heads in my last two produce deliveries. I decided to make a No-Mayo Cole Slaw with Apples this week from Mark Bittman’s How to Cook Everything Vegetarian. Cole slaw has always been my cabbage weakness, and this no-mayo variety dressed with a vinaigrette is really yummy and not nearly as high in fat as the kind with mayo. It kind of made up for the macaroni and cheese. Did I mention that I used whole milk in the macaroni and cheese?

Chocolate Chip Cookies from Elegant Expressions Bakery
I’m a little snooty about cookies because my chocolate chip cookies kick ass, but Elegant Expressions’ are better than mine. If you live in the Rochester area, you need to know that a.) these cookies freeze very well, and b.) you can eat them right out of the freezer, no thawing required. If you don’t live in the Rochester area, I offer my condolences, because Elegant Expressions' chocolate chip cookies make up for a lot of bad things in the world. Matter o’ fact, I think I’m going to go eat one right now.

Book mentioned:
Bittman, Mark. How to Cook Everything Vegetarian: Simple Meatless Recipes for Great Food. Hoboken, NJ: Wiley, 2007. (HC: 9780764524837)

Posted by adrienne at 09:53 PM | Comments (16)

November 10, 2008

The Long-Term Effects of Going on a Midwestern Extravaganza Instead of Doing Your Spring Cleaning

So today I was playing with the cats and realized that it had been quite some time since I had knocked the toy mice out from under the refrigerator. I have a yardstick I keep around for this purpose. This is what I found:

#1-Seven toy mice. SEVEN.
#2-Enough cat hair to make an entirely new cat. Now I know I am prone to exaggeration, but I put Ella next to the hairball that emerged from under my refrigerator, and it was almost as big as her. Ella weighs TWELVE POUNDS.
#3-The word “hit” (on a magnet).

I was going to see if there were any toy mice to knock out from under the stove, but I lost my nerve. Maybe tomorrow.

[Note: Mulling over this incident put me in mind of one of my all-time favorite posts at Read, Write, Believe: “Where Ideas Come From.” I reread it today, and I think you should, too. If you’re participating in the Comment Challenge (I am), you can leave a comment HERE and then follow the link over to Sara’s blog and leave a comment THERE, and that will be 2/5 or 20% of the comments you need to leave for the day. How efficient is that?]

[Note #2: Maybe today’s sludge will turn into an appliance repairperson who has to go fix the crazy cat lady’s refrigerator because it gets all clogged up with cat hair and toy mice. The crazy cat lady is, needless to say, the main character.]

Posted by adrienne at 10:52 PM | Comments (10)

November 08, 2008

Apples and Oranges

Ever since Max was a baby, I’ve been singing him the “Who’s a Good Boy?” song. JJ suggested it was unoriginal back in the day (which, okay, she had a point), but Max kind of loves it and now when I sing, “Who’s a good boy? Who’s a good boy?” He sings back, “MAXWELL IS! MAXWELL IS!” This is basically the cutest thing he does.

The second cutest thing he does is recite one of my favorite fingerplays, “Here Is a Beehive.” He does that great thing where he can only remember every second or third word, and he never manages to count to five properly because he’s too busy concentrating on scrunching up his neck because he knows I’m going to tickle him.

When Lucas was two-going-on-three, he had very little use for rhymes and songs. He hated “Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes” so much that he would yell and holler “TURN IT OFF!” whenever he heard it.

They look alike, but they are very different children.

Posted by adrienne at 09:42 PM | Comments (8)

November 04, 2008

“I Always Pick Up All My Playthings”

I voted this morning, but I have been trying to tell myself all day that I’m not that invested in who wins and that it will all be okay no matter what. 2000 and 2004 were hard election years for me; I think I’m a little scarred. Everyone I’ve talked to on the phone tonight has been watching election coverage. Here’s a partial list of what I did instead:

*Made a batch of party potatoes.
*Made hummus.
*Washed dishes.
*Packed up three boxes of stuff to take to the VOA.
*Cleaned out the cat boxes.
*Put away the Halloween decorations.
*Did two loads of laundry.

This was after working two hours over yesterday and one hour over today. I was, in theory, tired. When I start packing things up to take to the VOA, though, you can tell I have some nervous energy going on. At least my preferred method of avoidance is productive.

Books referenced in post title:
Seuss, Dr. The Cat in the Hat. Boston: Houghton Mifflin, 1957. (You can get an ISBN off the copy in your bookcase.)

Posted by adrienne at 10:24 PM | Comments (9)

November 03, 2008

Blog the Vote

You all should run and check out Blog the Vote 2008, a multi-blog effort to remind people to vote tomorrow. Like there are any watat.com readers not voting, but, still, it makes me feel better to see that there are all kinds of people who are just as passionate about voting as I am. Not to get all braggy, but at my polling place, they give me a cookie AND a sticker when I vote. As if the ability to exercise my rights wasn’t enough.

Posted by adrienne at 06:31 PM | Comments (5)

November 02, 2008

Adrienne vs. Multitasking… ROAR! ADRIENNE WINS!!!

Contrary to the image I think I project, I’m not a very good multitasker. I can be very efficient, and I get a lot done, but I tend to do it by focusing on one thing at a time. If there is a television on in a room, for instance, I can’t seem to concentrate on anything else. I generally read books in a day or two, mostly because I’ll just keep reading the darned things until they’re done. I’m at my happiest when I’m immersed in something. If I spend too much time thinking about the big picture, I just freak out.

I’ve always been like this, but I note that I’ve gotten more so since my husband died. For a long time, I’d get really cranky from time-to-time and not be able to understand why, but I came to realize that part of it was having a really low tolerance for a lot of things going on. I’ve been trying to cope with this in a lot of ways, one of which is making sure I’m not overloading my schedule, but what I have noticed about life is that you cannot control it, no matter how hard you try. So this week, I had the deadline for getting my materials ready for my homeschooling workshops, Halloween, Lucas’s birthday, Jason’s knee surgery (which not only involved a scary hospital visit but also doing all five of Jason’s storytimes in addition to my one this past week), and two presentations looming this week coming up.

At the beginning of the week, I looked at the big picture, and I freaked out.

But you know what? I did everything. I started to freak out a few times, but I stopped myself and ignored the big picture and concentrated on what I had to do NOW and got it all done. I feel like maybe it’s a little step in the right direction.

Books mentioned in a manner one might call willfully obtuse:
Shea, Bob. Dinosaur vs. Bedtime. NY: Hyperion Books for Children, 2008. (HC: 9781423113355)

Posted by adrienne at 09:07 PM | Comments (4)

November 01, 2008

Five Little Pumpkins Sitting on a Gate...

The first one said, “Oh, my, it’s getting late.”

The second one said, “There’s magic in the air!”

The third one said, “But we don’t care!”

The fourth one said, “Let’s run, run, run!”

The fifth one said, “We’ll have some fun!”

Then WOOOOSH went the wind,

And OUT went the light,

And the five little pumpkins rolled out of sight.

Posted by adrienne at 12:22 PM | Comments (3)

October 29, 2008

Into the Wild

At the beginning of the school year, Lucas decided to read the first book in the Warriors series, Into the Wild by Erin I’m-Really-Three-Chicks Hunter. He talked about it quite a bit while he was reading it, and I came to think of it as the book that introduced the phrase “lifeless body” into his vocabulary. I don’t mean that as criticism: the phrase is hackneyed, sure, but occasionally bodies are, indeed, lifeless.

Anyway, this turned out to be the first book Lucas read that I hadn’t read first. He sensed the profound wrongness of this state of affairs, and a couple weeks after he finished the book, he gave it to me to read.

Now, I have been vaguely interested in Warriors because the children are all rabid about it, but I’ve been interested in the way that hasn’t led me to, you know, read one of the books. But LUCAS gave me this book. Clearly I had to read it.

I started it a week or so ago. I can tell I’m not loving it by the way I haven’t finished it yet. In fact, I’ve done something completely uncharacteristic for me and started another book entirely (I may read the ending of a book before I start it from time-to-time, but I do NOT start a new book before I’ve finished the one I’m reading), HomeSchooling at the Speed of Life by Marilyn Rockett, which I do, in fact, love. It’s a book for Christian moms on how to keep their homes clean and orderly while homeschooling their children (chapters include “Paper by the Pile” and “Clutter, Clutter Everywhere and Not a Spot to Think”). I am not a Christian homeschooling mom, nor do I plan to implement any of Rockett’s strategies, wise and sensible though they are. I love reading about them, though. I’ve been using the book over the last couple days as a reward for doing the chores that keep my house from being condemned, mainly laundry and the dishes. It’s not that I dislike cleaning or organizing; it’s just that reading about it is so much better. Or maybe it’s just better than reading about the lifeless bodies of feral cats. I’ll finish Into the Wild and let you know.

Books mentioned:
Hunter, Erin W. Into the Wild. NY: HarperCollins, 2003. (HC: 9780060000028, LIB: 9780060525484, PB: 9780060525507)
Rockett, Marilyn. HomeSchooling at the Speed of Life: Balancing Home, School, and Family in the Real World. Nashville, TN: B&H Publishing Group, 2007. (PB: 9780805444858)

Posted by adrienne at 09:09 PM | Comments (5)

October 28, 2008

Reason Number 457 to Love Facebook

Today when I logged onto Facebook for the first time in a couple days, I was reminded of why I should not let too much time pass without checking in. For there, on my Wall, was a message from Pat telling me that she had just seen a Halloween Special Edition Magic 8 Ball at Target. She even offered to pick one up for me. This was such exciting news that I had to run and try to find one IMMEDIATELY, though, which is exactly what I did.

For a dismaying thirty seconds, I thought they were sold out. It was only when I was shuffling along muttering to myself on the way out of the Halloween section that I saw them way up on a top shelf, as if they weren’t the number one most requested Halloween item Target sells. Please.

I bought two: one for me and one for an eight-year-old boy I know who will be turning nine on Monday. I don’t want to name names, but he really likes Halloween.

Question: Will I ever figure out how to navigate the new Facebook interface efficiently?
Halloween Special Edition Magic 8 Ball: Scary but true.

Question: Isn’t Pat one of the awesomest people I know?
Halloween Special Edition Magic 8 Ball: It’s in the bag!

Question: Does candy have calories on Halloween night?
Halloween Special Edition Magic 8 Ball: It might be a trick.

Drat.

Posted by adrienne at 10:07 PM | Comments (6)

October 27, 2008

“Do One Thing Every Day that Scares You”

I cannot tell you how many days my husband spent at Strong Memorial Hospital during the last three years of his life—100, even 150, doesn’t seem unlikely. We spent a lot of time exploring the place while we were there, even when Brian was inpatient or post-op or neutropenic (or, heck, all three at once). Whatever was going on, we’d take his entourage of medical equipment along, and so people who worked all over the hospital knew us, the young couple where the husband was so increasingly obviously dying of cancer.

I’ve avoided the hospital since Brian died, but I had to go there today.

I thought I might throw up on the drive over, but the moment I drove into the front loop and realized that the multimillion dollar project they’d done to improve the parking situation hadn’t improved the parking situation, I went into a routine I know so well: stalk someone on the way out to their parking spot, remember what floor you’re on, turn off your cell phone on your way into the building.

Everything about that hospital smells like Brian dying.

Back in the day, I never used elevators at the hospital unless Brian wasn’t well enough to walk on his own. In fact, we regularly raced to see if he could make it to whatever floor we were going to faster on the elevator than I could running the stairs. Only the occasional staff person and health nut ever uses the stairs at Strong—I think people are generally in too much of a daze over whatever illness brings them there to bother with health—and sometimes if I felt like I wasn’t getting enough exercise, I’d run the stairs from the sixth floor (where Bri usually stayed) down to the basement and back up a few times.

Today, my business was in the basement, and, in a daze, I took the elevator down.

I’ve gotten used to some of the smells. My weekly allergy shots have taught me to stop passing out every time I smell rubbing alcohol. My cleaner has taught me to stop retching whenever I smell bleach. People will say the hospital smells sterile, but it does not. They’ll say it smells like urine and vomit, but it does not. It smells like all of that at the same time, and there’s more mixed in—new babies and tomato soup and Jell-o and crackers and magazines and spare change and coffee and people who have stayed there overnight unexpectedly.

I couldn’t decide if I should breathe shallowly or deeply while I visited with my friend who was recovering from surgery. I relaxed, finally, talking to the nurse, remembering that language I knew so well about things like antibiotics and heart rates and hydration and pain management. I kept telling myself it was okay if I had to leave after half an hour, but I stayed nearly two.

On the way out, I took the stairs. I kicked off my clogs and ran up to the sixth floor. I don’t know how long it took me to open the door. A while. I went and looked down the hall of what used to be the cancer unit. I’m not sure if it is anymore or not, but it smells just the same. I put my shoes back on, I walked down the stairs, and I came home.

Posted by adrienne at 09:44 PM | Comments (24)

October 25, 2008

Service to Homeschooling Families: Workshops for Library Staff in California

I’ve been preparing for these workshops for months, but it’s only now that I’m doing the final preparations for my first presentation in San Francisco at the beginning of December that I truly believe it’s all going to happen.

WOO HOO!

I try to confine my homeschooling thoughts to articles and my Homeschooling and Libraries blog (which, okay, I don’t update enough), but this is too exciting not to share with the rest of you. First, I get to spend a lot of time talking about homeschooling, which I love. Second, California is a big state with a lot of homeschoolers who are well-organized and influential on a national level. Third, it turns out I have quite a few friends here and there in California. And, last, it’s CALIFORNIA—and in the winter besides. There is a very real possibility that I will see the sun.

If you’re a librarian and want to learn more about the workshops (program description, dates, times, locations, registration info), please do visit the Infopeople website. In the meantime, I think I need to take a few minutes to bask in how very fortunate I am.

Posted by adrienne at 02:32 PM | Comments (11)

October 20, 2008

My Invisible Friend, or The Other Godson

You can’t hear him, but Max is chanting, “Get in the car with ME, Adrienne! Get in the car with ME!”

Well, it really sounds more like, “Get in ca’ wi’ ME, A-ren! Get in ca’ wi’ ME!” You kind of have to speak Max. He was talking about train tracks yesterday for a while, too, but “train tracks” sounded more like “brain box,” which sounds way more interesting than train tracks, if you ask me. It’s worth noting that Max gets kind of annoyed if you mention this.

Here he is engaging in his favorite pastime, irritating his mother by playing in the dirt:

And here he is trying to feed a goat’s butt:

That didn’t really work out for Max or the goat, but it was pretty funny.

Posted by adrienne at 03:03 PM | Comments (7)

October 19, 2008

“Abracapocus”

“I Am a Little Fat-ee-gued.”
-Bugs Bunny in “Transylvania 6-5000”

When I was a little girl, LONG before the days of VHS (or even Beta), my mother taped the audio from the Bugs Bunny cartoon “Transylvania 6-5000” on a cassette for me, which I would listen to over and over and over and over. I think the tape’s still in a box in my basement somewhere: that’s how much I love it. It’s the one where Bugs ends up in Transylvania instead of Pittsburgh and mistakes a vampire’s castle for a hotel and the vampire himself (“Count Blood Count”) for the hotel’s head waiter. I suppose it’s no wonder that I grew up to be the sort of person who loves B-grade horror and cannot seem to resist Halloween attractions, and so even though I was so tired last night that I had a hard time finding the will to steam some cauliflower for my dinner, when Ron called and asked if I was up for going to the Boy Scouts’ annual haunted house, I said yes.*

Troop 292 knows how to put on a haunted house. We’ve gone the last three years, and it’s always a good time. For starters, we never have to wait in a huge line, which is nice with Lucas since he breaks out with the annoying routine after about five minutes of line-waiting.

The second thing I love about this particular haunted house is that it observes what I have decided are my two rules for haunted attractions. Rule #1 is NO CHAINSAWS. Rule #2 is NO ONE TOUCHES ME. We went to a haunted hayride a couple weeks ago that I mostly enjoyed but, seriously, my body belongs to me and I don’t care if you have a scary mask on if you touch me I am totally hitting you. I mean, DUH. As for the chainsaws, when I told Ron last night that I didn’t want to go to any more scary things with chainsaws, he very patiently explained to me that they take the chains off so the saws can’t hurt me. And I very patiently explained back that chainsaws are loud and smelly and inherently scary. Since I went through all that effort to conquer my fear of heights, I think chainsaws are the closest thing I have to a phobia, and you know what? I am okay with that. I don’t want to be around chainsaws, I don’t have to be around chainsaws, and that’s the end of that story.

The third thing I love about Troop 292’s haunted house is that they do an amazing job with it every year. It’s family-friendly but still makes me jump a few times, the kids in masks are considerate of little ones and how they’re feeling, and they always put a maze at the end that is genuinely difficult to get out of in a way that is fun rather than irritating. We solved it in about five or ten minutes this year, but one year it took us about twenty—and even then we wound up following someone else to find our way out.

And you know what’s the best thing in the world to do after that? Remember that you have a cold and go to bed.

*For the record, I was also being emotionally manipulated into going, as Lucas said he wouldn’t go if I didn’t, which I think his father put him up to, but still. Manipulators.

Posted by adrienne at 05:40 PM | Comments (6)

October 18, 2008

Sick and Tired

The combination of germy people in my vicinity and completely overdoing it this week has penetrated the immune system I’ve spent years working with children building, and I have a cold. It’s not a bad cold, I guess, but it’s making me tired and cranky. For instance, this morning I didn’t put in my contact lenses because it seemed like too much effort. I drank lots of caffeine to get through my shift at work, and then I came home and took a nap. It took me about an hour to convince myself it was a good idea to walk upstairs and turn on the laptop.

Sigh.

I can totally hear my allergist—the only doctor who has the ability to convince me to do something I don’t want to do—lecturing me about getting a flu shot. He started in on me about this last year. I was all like, “I don’t get the flu. I don’t think I’ve ever even had the flu.” And he was all like, “You aren’t supposed to wait to get the flu to get the shot.”

I already get allergy shots every two weeks: ISN’T THAT ENOUGH?

He says no.

Of course, this is terrible timing. I need to get on the ladder (again) to clean the leaves out of my gutters. I need to haul some stuff to the VOA. I’m writing a couple articles on deadline.

I don’t even care. I just want to watch DVDs and nap, which is, I think, what exactly what I’m going to do.

Posted by adrienne at 07:49 PM | Comments (4)

October 15, 2008

Okay, So I Am Doing Three Presentations on Three Different Topics this Week

The third one’s really short, but, seriously, who plans my life? Shouldn’t I be better at not scheduling my time this way by now?

The first presentation was on Monday as part of our library’s annual staff training day. I think I managed not to “um” too-too much. Part of that was because I had a small group (nine people) and part of that was because they were a ridiculously kind audience—attentive and smiling and whatnot. I was talking about what’s new with art in children’s books and began by reading Wolves by Emily Gravett. Thank heaven they laughed, or I probably would have melted into a puddle on the floor.

Tomorrow, I do a presentation on science materials for K-2 teachers from the local school district. I am looking forward to it and fretting about it in equal measure. I really hope that everyone who attends finds at least one thing they can fall in love with and use in their classrooms.

Friday is ten minutes about flickr and the Kodak Gallery, which is not going to be hard but, still, I’ll be in public, speaking.

Wish me luck?

Posted by adrienne at 10:15 PM | Comments (6)

October 08, 2008

The Word of the Day is “Icosahedron”

When I went to Florida this past June, my cousin’s stepdaughter gave me a magic 8 ball she’d found in a thrift shop a year or so before and saved for me, a magic 8 ball I had no idea even existed, the Ruby Gloom Magic 8 Ball.

Q: WHY have I not told my faithful readers of your existence before today?
Ruby Gloom Magic 8 Ball: Yeah

Q: That doesn’t make sense.
Ruby Gloom Magic 8 Ball: Not a chance.

Q: Is it true what wikipedia says about you being a clothing line that was made into a television show?
Ruby Gloom Magic 8 Ball: Yes, and don’t doubt me!

Ruby Gloom is not all that’s new in my collection. A few months ago, Patty U. gave me a cute little half-sized silver Time Warner Magic 8 Ball right out of the blue. She was like, “I got this Time Warner Magic 8 Ball? Do you want it?” And I was like, “OMG! Can I come pick it up NOW?”

Q: Are you planning to take over the world?
Time Warner Magic 8 Ball: Can’t say now.

That’s what I thought.

A few months ago, Sabrina sent me a link to one of the most fascinating things I’ve ever seen: a Magic 8 Ball autopsy. As you might suspect, I have more than one regular magic 8 ball and have long considered sacrificing one and doing just such a thing myself, but I was kind of scared of the blue fluid, which these crazy people TASTED. If that doesn’t prove the Internet a worthwhile venture, I don’t know what does.

Personal Affirmation Magic 8 Ball: The sky’s the limit!

Indeed.

Posted by adrienne at 10:17 PM | Comments (7)

September 30, 2008

Alternative Stand-Up Comedy in Rochester

An upcoming event for those of you who are local:

Del Rivers Presents: A Night of Alternative Stand-Up Comedy – featuring Del Rivers, Kenyatta DeCosta, Chuck McCoy, Richard Gagnier
For ages 16 and over
8 pm show, doors open at 7:30
Friday, October 24th
The lodge in Brighton Town Park, 777 Westfall Road
$3 admission to be donated to local charity. For more information, email: Frankinstamm@hotmail.com. For more information about the performers: www.groupofsix.bravehost.com.

Posted by adrienne at 02:27 PM | Comments (2)

September 29, 2008

In Which Our Heroine Eats a Bacon Doughtnut and Visits the Oregon Coast

Those of you who know Chuck and Jeffrey know that they have this thing about bacon. Now the rest of you know it, too. At any rate, several months ago Jeffrey alerted me to the existence of a place called Voodoo Doughnut in Portland that serves maple bacon doughnuts. Some people go to cities to discover art: I went to Portland to buy a new bag and try a doughnut two of my friends want to eat.

Alkelda got into the spirit and made a video of my first maple bacon doughnut experience:

And, heck, I was there, so I got their signature Voodoo Doughnut, too. He’s a little squished here, but you get the idea:

The filling is raspberry, naturally. Well, I don’t know what was natural about it, but it was yummy. Alkelda wisely chose a vegan variety.

I wish I could say that the above was my only caloric indulgence of the weekend, but that would be lying. A lot. I made up for some of it yesterday, though, when I rented a car and drove to the coast. It was a beautiful, amazing drive through the mountains that ended with this:

I guess the weather was crap here at home yesterday (it sure is today!), but yesterday in my corner of Oregon, it was 80 degrees and sunny. I walked the beach for about an hour and a half. I didn’t particularly want to leave, but I knew I had to do storytime tomorrow. Sigh.

Posted by adrienne at 07:31 PM | Comments (17)

September 28, 2008

The Things They Carried, or There is No Sales Tax in Portland

I know that I was in Portland (Oregon, in case you, like me, are having trouble keeping up with my timezone changes) for a conference or whatever, but for several months now, I’ve been thinking of the trip as a pilgrimage to visit the Queen Bee Creations studio.

For review purposes, this is the Queen Bee purse I originally fell in love with, The Purse that Rendered All Other Purses Useless (“TPTRAOPU” for short):

If this purse looks familiar, it’s because I carry it everywhere, and also because it is in 9 out of 10 photographs of me, even when I’m at the beach in Cape Cod:

I like to keep it near me at all times, as Eisha is forever threatening to steal it, and that Eisha is wiley.

So, anyway, Alkelda came down to Portland a day early so we could have a day of wild-and-crazy fun before the conference started, and she very indulgently agreed to make the Queen Bee studio our second stop on Friday. This is what we found:

AND:

There was even more, but I stopped taking photos because I didn’t want to be a pain in the ass. Plus if I’d looked at those bags any longer, I would have bought more than I did.

Regarding my purchases, what you must bear in mind is that most everything in the studio is on sale. Also, Oregon doesn’t have sales tax. I don’t know what sales tax is like in other areas, but in my county, it’s 8%. It felt like EVERYTHING was on sale here.

Okay, so I got a bag for Tammy:

How much do I want to keep this bag for myself? A lot. I will give it to Tammy, though, because I also bought myself a nice bag I can put my laptop in:

So I guess a lot of people are blogging about the Kidlitosphere Conference, and soon I will be, too. But first I’m going to spend some more time admiring my new bag and wishing I’d bought one or two more....

Posted by adrienne at 11:44 PM | Comments (11)

September 23, 2008

Things I Wouldn't Mind Doing When I Visit Portland, Oregon Later This Week

I leave extremely early in the morning on Thursday to go to Portland to a.) hang out, and b.) attend the 2nd Annual Kidlitosphere Conference. (Can you believe it's been a year since the last one? I can't.)

For the record, I should be packing right now.

Instead, I am going to tell you some things I'd like to do:

1. Visit the Queen Bee Creations studio so as to acquire another bag perfect strangers will compliment me on profusely everywhere I go.
2. Drink coffee.
3. Spend quality time at Powell's.
4. Go on an Underground Portland tour.
5. Go to the Portland Saturday Market, which is conveniently also open on Sunday.
6. Drink a few local beers.
7. Drive to the coast.
8. Do this walking tour that's in one of the travel guides I bought.

I will report back on what I actually accomplish. #2, #3, and #6 are definites. #1 is a very likely.

None of it will happen if I don't get on the plane Thursday morning with luggage. Really packing now.

Posted by adrienne at 10:36 PM | Comments (17)

September 13, 2008

“Now There’s Nothing Dark and There’s Nothing Weird,” or How Public Speaking Might Be Improving My Personal Life

As long as I’ve been a librarian, I’ve been speaking in public on a regular basis for one reason or another. As a children’s librarian, I’m in front of audiences all the time, but most of that time I’m reading books or telling stories and that’s nothing like what it is to be a lone person attempting to educate and/or entertain a room of adults. Just for starters, most children think I am brilliant because I can read and tie my own shoes. Reading is, in fact, my most honed skill, and adults aren’t impressed with that at all. They tut a lot if you can’t read, but they miss the fact that you can read really well entirely.

Anyway, since the publication of Helping Homeschoolers in the Library, my public speaking engagements have ramped up. I’m doing more of them over a larger geographic area, and I’m also getting paid. This is a whole new realm for me. I can speak in public, which is something since a lot of people refuse to speak in public entirely, but it’s always frustrated me that I’m not as good at it as I am at writing. I am not polished. I have a tendency to “um” and “yeah” and say “like” a lot. I tell more truth than is probably prudent from time-to-time, and I always laugh.

And so I’ve been puzzling over this and watching the more refined speakers I see on a fairly regular basis in my personal and professional life trying to figure out how *I* can become *them*. This is what I have learned: those people who are polished, they *think* before they speak—and they do it ALL THE TIME.

What do I mean? I mean that even in one-on-one conversation, these are people who speak in slow, measured tones. They take the pause to process. I first became aware of this when I asked Tammy how she avoids saying “um” when she teaches, and she was like, “I don’t know. I just don’t say it.” So I started watching her, and it’s true, she hardly ever says “um.” On the other hand, “um” is one of the words I use the most, and I’ve realized that it’s because when I’m speaking, my thoughts aren’t very well-organized. I hardly ever take the pause to think through what I’m going to say before I say it.

My loved ones have been suggesting that this is a problem for years, but I thought it was just, you know, a me-and-them thing. I never noticed how it impacted other ways I communicated.

This has been a bit of an epiphany.

I’m not sure what I can do with it. I have a hard time organizing my thoughts even in normal conversation, partly because groups of people make me anxious (ironic for a public librarian perhaps, but whatever) and partly because oh my gosh my thoughts are all over the place, which is why I write. Writing gives me time to pause and reflect and make some kind of sense out of all the things I see and hear and feel all day long. I mean, remember that outdoor storytime when I forgot where I was in “Little Bunny Foo-Foo”? It was totally because someone in the back of the audience was doing something and I was trying to figure out what it was and I got so preoccupied with it that I forgot to pay attention to what I, myself, was doing. This used to happen to me a lot more, but mortification has really helped my self-awareness in this area. When I asked another librarian how she sounds so polished when she speaks, she says it’s because she over-prepares. I’ve been trying that, too, with good results.

I remain a bit suspicious of the process, though. This way I think, it makes me a good writer. It makes me a good problem-solver. It makes me someone who will go ahead and try stuff other people won’t. Should I be messing with that? (Chorus of Loved Ones: “Yes!”)

Okay, so I can probably retain the benefits of my thought processes while still becoming a slightly more refined speaker. I could probably stand to be less spontaneous. And in the end, no one’s asking me to give a speech like Obama. People are really just interested in whether or not I can communicate what I know in a way that is helpful to others, which I already know I can do. I just have to learn not to “um.” But can I just tell you? It’s really, really hard.

Posted by adrienne at 03:26 PM | Comments (13)

September 11, 2008

The Planes Fly Low Over Chili

Lucas announced during breakfast that it was a good thing I wore red because today is Patriot Day.

“Do you know why it’s Patriot Day?” I asked.

“Because of the towers,” he said.

I told him I remembered that day, that it was a day much like today—chilly and bright. I’d gone for a walk that morning, so I didn’t know a thing about it until I got in the car. The plane hit the second tower on my drive to work.

“There were three planes,” Lucas said. “Mommy said so.”

I explained about the Pentagon and the fourth plane that crashed in Pennsylvania. I told him how small he was when it happened, that he played while we watched the news for days and days. I told him how weird it was not to hear planes flying by. I thought about what it was like when they started again.

Lucas took a bite of his sandwich and chewed for a while.

“Well,” he said, “it won’t happen again. All those people who did it died in the planes, right?”

“Right,” I told him. “Of course.”

Posted by adrienne at 09:56 PM | Comments (3)

September 06, 2008

Adrienne vs. the Volcano

This is what you need to know: I love airplanes. As many times as I’ve flown, I still make sure I have a window seat and always spend a fair amount of the flight staring out the window.

So, anyway, today I was staring out the window about an hour before my flight was due to land in Seattle. We were flying over mostly solid cloud cover, and I saw this smudge on the horizon and thought, “Is that a mountain? No, that’s not a mountain. You just WANT it to be a mountain. It’s really just an optical illusion.”

Strictly speaking, it wasn’t a mountain. It was Mount Rainier, which is a volcano and is also the biggest thing I have ever seen in my entire life. And that isn’t my hyperbole talking. I seriously have never seen anything that big in my entire life. Of course, until today, I had never been to the Pacific Northwest. They have big old mountains all over the place out here. Ditto coffee. Well, if you rate it by volume, the mountains are probably winning. If you compare cups—or even pots—of coffee to the number of mountains, though, the coffee’s taking it.

I know it’s only 9:00pm here, but I got up at 6:00am EST this morning and it’s hard not to notice that it’s now midnight EST. Coffee can only help so much.

Posted by adrienne at 12:11 AM | Comments (5)

September 04, 2008

Adrienne Goes International

Okay, so I don’t want to get all braggy, but some libraries in other countries have purchased Helping Homeschoolers in the Library, such as:

*Bayerische Staatsbibliothek in Germany, where homeschooling is verboten. By the way, bonus points for me figuring out how to search a catalog in a language I don't understand. (Type “helping homeschoolers” in the box next to "titel," then click the "Suchen" box.) I AM A LIBRARIAN! HEAR ME ROAR!!!
*The Chinese University of Hong Kong
*The National Library of New Zealand

I feel like I need to get on a plane and go visit my book in all these libraries.

Posted by adrienne at 08:39 PM | Comments (20)

September 03, 2008

Fourth Grade

*insert drumroll*

First Grade

Second Grade

Third Grade

Fourth Grade

Lucas: WHY does EVERYONE want to take a picture of me with the sunflowers?

Me: It’s what they teach us to do at grown-up school.

Lucas’s new classroom is way at the end of the big-kid hall. For some reason, I didn’t think they moved into the big-kid hall until fifth grade, which is silly as the school only goes up to fifth grade, but that doesn’t really make me feel any better about this big-kid hall business.

*sniff*

Posted by adrienne at 09:29 AM | Comments (12)

August 31, 2008

Ten Rules to Help You Survive Widowhood, a Reprint

[Ed. Note: I first published this post a couple years ago, and it has since remained one of the most-viewed entries on my blog. You’d be surprised at how often—at least once a day—the Google search “how do you survive widowhood” leads to my blog. I remember what it was like to be at the other end of that search. Reposting my rules seemed like a decent way to honor the fourth anniversary of Brian’s death, partly because they remind me of how far I’ve come and partly because it seems there’s nothing else to say.]

About a week after my husband died, I started reading a book that cited some less-than-encouraging statistics about how many widows die and/or experience severe injuries or illness within a couple years of their loved one’s death. I got completely freaked out and decided that I wasn’t going to read any more books about grief. Instead, I made up my own list of rules for surviving widowhood. They’ve served me pretty well, so I offer them to you*:

1. Don’t let fear control you. Your scary thing already happened, and – look! – you’re still here.
2. If you need to cry, just cry. If you avoid it, you’re just going to feel like crap.
3. If you’re tired, sleep. Grief is exhausting.
4. You should look as good as you can as often as possible. Aside from the fact that this will help you feel better, it will encourage people to stop treating you like you’re completely sad and pathetic, even though you are completely sad and pathetic.
5. Eat three meals a day. This sounds easy, but it’s not when you’re grieving.
6. Exercise on a regular basis. It will help you work through anger and depression, and it will also help you accomplish Rule #4.
7. Speaking of anger, find ways to deal with it that don’t involve taking it out on your remaining loved ones. You’ll take it out on your loved ones without meaning to, of course, which is why it’s important to try to channel as much anger as possible in another direction, such as picture books by Madonna.
8. Talk about your grief and the person you lost. Your existence is going to make people uncomfortable whether you talk about what happened or not, and people are probably wondering what you’re thinking and feeling even if they can’t figure out how to ask. Talking about grief is part of what makes it real and helps you work through it. Some people choose to, say, start a blog and then insist that their friends, relatives, acquaintances, and even perfect strangers start reading it.
9. Travel. You’ll be sorry if you spend a lot of time avoiding your grief, but it’s good to take a vacation from it every now and again.
10. Avoid people who aren’t loving and caring. This is a good rule for life in general, but you really aren’t emotionally stable enough to deal with a bunch of nonsense when you’re grieving.

*Note: I left off the rules that should be obvious, such as, “Don’t jump in front of a bus.” I mean, if you’re jumping in front of busses, it’s hard for me to believe that you’re taking surviving seriously.

Posted by adrienne at 12:33 AM | Comments (17)

August 30, 2008

Dick’s is Probably One of My Least Favorite Places in this World, but You Have to Appreciate the Irony of a Sporting Goods Store with Escalators

You know how when you walk by an Abercrombie & Fitch, you don’t want to go in because every single thing about the front of the place tells you that this is not the store for you?

That is exactly how I feel about sporting goods stores.

I think my problem stems from the fact that when I am in a sporting goods store, I never know when I’m going to turn a corner and find a huge display of knives or guns or bottled deer urine or whatever, and all the camouflage makes me feel like maybe I’ve wandered into “The Most Dangerous Game.” And while I am nearly always in these places to get stuff to wear to the gym, I don’t self-identify as someone who is into fitness, and I am certainly never going to learn to love performance fabrics more than I love cotton. From the clothing selection at Dick’s, I’ve come to the conclusion that there is a sizable subculture of teeny tiny fit people who like to exercise in clothes that show off all that work they’ve been doing.

I don’t want to do that.

When I exercise, I want to wear something soft and roomy and cozy enough to sleep in because I just know I’m going to lose consciousness in the middle of spinning class one of these days, and I figure I might as well be comfortable when I wake up on the floor. That is my approach to fitness. My approach to sporting goods stores is to ask Tammy to go with me, but in a fit of independence, I went by myself the other day and did manage to find everything I was looking for—namely a couple new pairs of yoga pants and a pair of swim goggles, which involved a ride on the store’s ironic escalators and a bonus perusal of a display of the aforementioned bottled deer urine. And, heck, I even stopped and looked at the backpacks and sneakers. It’s back-to-school time, so they had a fun little display of pens. The store’s not so bad, I guess, but I would still rather stay home and read a book.

Posted by adrienne at 02:26 PM | Comments (6)

August 27, 2008

My Father Just Taught Me How to Download a Ringtone to My Cell Phone

Around the library and even in my personal life, people think of me as kind of a techie. I think this is because I run a few blogs and buy videogames for the library and have a cell phone and yammer on about how much I love my iPod. This really only goes to show how untechie most librarians are, though, because it was only this morning that my sixty-year-old father taught me how to download a ringtone to my cell phone. “I downloaded a Godsmack song,” he said. “It’s easy.”

He told me how to do it, and it is easy, kind of, if you don’t get frustrated by hitting a lot of buttons and reading fine print and not being able to find the first two songs you were looking for. I got frustrated.

This is the story of me and a lot of technology. For instance, I’ve been wanting to transfer this here blog to Wordpress for well over a year now (Could it be two years? Yikes.), but I just can’t make myself read up on what I need to do to make that happen. One of my problems? I’ve lost the login for the server and don’t want to admit it to the server administrator, on account of he already knows enough about how I don’t know how to run a website. Sometimes I still lock the doors when I mean to roll down the windows in the car I’ve had for eight months; I don’t think I’m going to be figuring out Linux anytime soon.

This summer, Tammy and I have been canning. Technologically speaking, canning is my speed. It took me about fifteen minutes’ worth of reading to get the basics of the process a few weeks ago, and there are nice, clear step-by-step instructions we can follow that just about guarantee useful results. So far, we’ve made and canned blueberry jam, peach jam, peach fondue jam (with chocolate!), and peach rum sauce. We’re talking about moving into pickles or maybe some kind of pear jam or who knows what. It’s like playing Little House on the Prairie with the benefit of indoor plumbing and no parents telling us we can’t use the stove.

I think, for me, the major difference between downloading a ringtone and making jam is this concept of guaranteed useful results. The technological things I tend to love (my iPod, online shopping, WORD PROCESSING) are the ones that aren’t cumbersome and help me do things I want to do more easily (listen to music, shop, write). The ones I avoid are like the ringtones: they’re bound up in weird rules, they involve way too many steps and keystrokes, and, in the end, I can’t be sure I’m going to get what I want out of my time investment. The thing that fascinates me is that companies don’t have to create complicated products. In the long run, it doesn’t really take that much more time and energy to make a decent product as opposed to a crappy one, but companies keep putting out unnecessarily complicated products and people keep buying them. This problem is endemic to libraries, where our motto seems to be something like, “We’ll be happy to spend thousands on your crappy database.” I keep encouraging people to stop this practice, but it’s kind of an uphill battle in an environment where so many products are, in fact, crappy—which might be more the truth about why so many librarians resist technology. Conference speakers would have us believe it’s because we have so many Luddites in our midst, but I don’t think so. I think we have a bunch of smart, busy people who are sick of trying to figure things out that ultimately confuse patrons and make our work lives more difficult when we could be spending our time reading a book or watching a movie or talking to our friends or seeing a show or any of the million other things we want to do in the average day that don’t make our brains melt and start oozing out our ears. Ringtones aside, a fair amount of consumer-driven technology isn’t so frustrating, but library technology? Woo boy. I could write a book. Instead, though, I think I’ll make more jam.

Books mentioned:
Wilder, Laura Ingalls. Little House on the Prairie. New York, Harper, 1953. (HC: 9780060282448, PB: 9780060885397)

Posted by adrienne at 09:58 AM | Comments (6)

August 25, 2008

Overheard in the Children's Room

"You should just ask her. She knows where everything is because of her computer."

So *that's* my superpower.

Posted by adrienne at 10:18 PM | Comments (10)

August 22, 2008

“You Can’t Hide Behind Social Graces,” or Ways in which Dealing with Library Vendors is a lot like Dating

I’ve had a sales rep from a company hoping to sell me something stalking me via telephone at the library for over a week now. This is not uncommon. Back when I was in charge of an $8000 budget at the Maplewood Library, hardly anyone ever called, but now that I’m in charge of a larger budget, these people all want to talk to me.

I very seldom want to talk to them, though, and I’ve found that many of my strategies for coping with the onslaught are not unlike my strategies for dealing with men. Here we go:

#1-I don’t care how slick you are, if you don’t have a quality product, I am not interested.
The vast majority of sales reps who cold call you are selling crap. I’d liken cold-calling reps to the type of guy who will ask for your phone number before he knows your name. You don’t talk to the guy, and you certainly don’t talk to the vendor. If what this person to sell is so great, you already know about it or you’ll find out about it some other way.

#2-Modern technology provides us many useful ways to avoid/control telephone calls.
Just because someone wants to talk to you DOESN’T MEAN YOU HAVE TO TALK TO THEM. I don’t know how single women and librarians coped before caller ID and voicemail, but thanks to the combination of the two, I haven’t had to talk to too many people I haven’t wanted to for years. I know some librarians who feel badly about not calling reps back, but, seriously, I don’t know who you are, I didn’t ask for your call, and I’m busy. Leave me alone.

#3-If I’m not calling you back, it’s because I’m just not that into you.
The calling a few times a day? It makes me uncomfortable to watch you do this. I know it’s you even when you call and hang up. Please stop.

#4-I am almost always really busy right now.
I regularly talk to and welcome conversation with about three sales reps. What these reps have in common is the golden combination of quality products and basic manners. Most reps who manage to break through my caller ID/voicemail defense system try to pressure me into scheduling an appointment, which is a shocking display of poor manners and only leads me to steadfastly insist that I’m going through a really busy time. The beautiful thing about this is that since I’m always busy, it’s always true. I’ve found this one equally useful for men I’m done with.

As in dating, you can often count on a rep to buy you dinner or at least a drink, but sometimes—quite often—it’s just not worth the bother.

Have I mentioned that I really wish that rep would stop calling me?

Posted by adrienne at 12:06 AM | Comments (8)

August 20, 2008

The Edward Gorey House

We didn’t do a whole lot while we were in Cape Cod, but Tammy and I did make a point of visiting the Edward Gorey House Museum. If you’re a Gorey fan, I highly recommend going to see it before someone realizes that they could be charging a much higher admission rate and the house starts to lose its no-they-don’t-REALLY-have-that-sitting-right-there-do-they charm. For instance, apparently Edward liked to collect stuff he found at garage sales, and they have a lot of his collections just kind of sitting around where you can touch them:

Like you wouldn’t. Please.

They also have Ombledroom, their 24-pound housecat:

And a display case sponsored by Daniel Handler:

And a Gashlycrumb Tinies Graveyard:

And some Doubtful Guests:

How much do I want a Doubtful Guest topiary of my own? A lot.

The museum is also a widow-friendly environment, which I always appreciate:

I think part of what I love about Edward Gorey’s work is that in his world, I am completely and totally normal.

I think what I loved most about the house tour was that the docent told us that one of Edward’s favorite television shows was Buffy the Vampire Slayer. How cool is that? I guess he liked to sew while he watched TV, and the house is full of all these little stuffed things he made:

I have been a Gorey fan for a good many years now, but touring his house made me love him that much more. It’s a five-star destination in my travel book.

Books mentioned:
Gorey, Edward. The Doubtful Guest. NY: Peter Weed Books, 1957. (HC: 9780151003136)
-The Gashlycrumb Tinies, or After the Outing. NY: Harcourt, 1963. (HC: 9780151003082)

Posted by adrienne at 10:54 PM | Comments (15)

August 19, 2008

Running the Boston Marathon

Everyone wears a skirt for the marathon, right?

Posted by adrienne at 09:45 PM | Comments (3)

August 18, 2008

“We Roll and We Roll and We Roll and We Roll”

Our trip involved a lot of time in the car. Personally, I could ride in a car forever. I love staring out the window and listening to music and talking, and I’m a very good navigator when I remember that I’m supposed to be paying attention to where the car is headed. Tammy loves to drive, so this is a functional combination, and we spend much of our time together in her Highlander.

Of course, we had two children with us on this vacation, and while kids can often be amusing, they can also turn on you after a few hours and kill your serene musings. We have various strategies for dealing with this. We make sure they have toys, and when Ron’s around (as he was on this trip), we put him in the back with them. We also play road trip games, but Tammy and I are way faster than the rest of them at the ABC Game, and our other game is completely inappropriate for children (and Ron) and is normally played when the children are asleep or by whispering or by saying “blank” instead of the offensive word. (At one point when we were saying “blank,” Lucas was like, “Why is that funny?” Ron was like, “No one understands Mommy and Aunt Adrienne. Don’t worry about it.”)

The kids like music, and so we listened to some of our favorites (They Might Be Giants, “Cheesecake Truck,” “Rock N Roll McDonalds,” etc.). We also brought along the new Lisa Loeb CD, Camp Lisa. I like Lisa Loeb, but I’m always suspicious when someone who’s been making music for adults decides to put out a CD for kids. It often works out better than, say, when an adult musician tries to write books for children (AHEM, Ms. Ciccone), but I try not to get my hopes up. Camp Lisa is totally fun, though. It wasn’t too long before we were all laughing and singing along. Our favorite song is a song called “The Disappointing Pancake” that I’m going to ask Jason if he would pretty-please-with-syrup-on-top consider learning for storytime. Other highlights are a fun rendition of “Peanut Butter and Jelly” (one of my own childhood favorites: “First you take the peanuts and you pick them, you pick them”) and a song called “Grandma’s in the Cellar” that had Lucas all wide-eyed and laughing (sample lyric: “Grandma’s in the cellar, Lordy can’t you smell her?”). Recommended for road trips and iPods everywhere.

Posted by adrienne at 11:47 AM | Comments (7)

August 17, 2008

The Pit and the Pendulum

(l-r: Sal, A Child I Don’t Know, Max, Tammy, Lucas, The Other Max)

This pendulum was by far the most interesting thing in the Boston Museum of Science. I played with it for a good half hour and would have played with it longer if a bunch of kids hadn’t come along and ruined my fun. Rotten kids.

The Naboo Starfighter was also pretty cool.

Posted by adrienne at 11:05 AM | Comments (6)

August 16, 2008

Learning a Little More About Our Independence

Since it’s always snowed on my previous visits to Boston, I’d never realized what a handy navigational tool the Freedom Trail can be. I’d also never seen the tops of many of Boston’s buildings. The unicorn on the roof of the Old State House was, for instance, news to me.

I’d also never seen the frogs in action.

Nor had Max.

Water was a bit of a theme this trip.

Posted by adrienne at 10:22 PM | Comments (5)

August 11, 2008

AH, HA! I Managed to Snag Some Time on the Hotel's Computer

Our hotel expesses its disdain for its guests by serving truly horrible "free" coffee in the mornings and not heating its "heated" indoor swimming pool. Tammy, Lucas, and Max tried the pool. I'd call them fools, but I'm the one who tried the coffee.

Boston shows its love for us with wonderful food and things to see. The highlight so far was definitely Sunday, when we spent a day at the science museum with friends and then ran laughing through a downpour dragging the kids on our way to a Malaysian restaruant. I was sopping wet (my shoes are *still* wet), but the meal was totally worth it.

Today, I saw a sea dragon. Sea dragons are totally awesome.

More soon?

Posted by adrienne at 10:07 PM | Comments (9)

August 08, 2008

“Since I Still Tell You My Every Day”

When I’m using my best posture, I’m 5’1¾”, which is short. Still, those sunflowers are really freaking tall. I’m a bit concerned that they’ll take over the house or eat my car while I’m on vacation, but on vacation I must go. It will be a week in Boston and Cape Cod with the Pritchards (including my invisible friend Max, who becomes more entertaining by the minute), and I’m really looking forward to a break. I hate to leave you all in the lurch while I am Internetless, though, so I thought I’d suggest a few diversions.

Diversion #1: Beaker’s Ode to Joy

Thanks to TadMack for the link!

Diversion #2: Paris Hilton for President

Thanks to Robin for the link!

Diversion #3: Read a book!

I’ll be doing one last post tomorrow morning (a tri-blog, no less), and then I’m off and running. Have a lovely week!

Posted by adrienne at 08:00 PM | Comments (5)

August 01, 2008

“My Spine Hurts”

It was weeks ago when I took Lucas strawberry picking, but I want to remember that on the way there he asked me if strawberries grew “on trees or bushes or what.” He also asked me if Irondequoit Bay is Lake Erie. He also decided that strawberry picking is a lot of work.

Posted by adrienne at 07:35 AM | Comments (2)

July 31, 2008

But, Adrienne, What Are You DOING When You Aren’t Blogging?

A little over a month ago, Alkelda posted photos of the peaceful sanity that reigns in her yard. As a little comparison-contrast, I thought I’d show you what I have (and haven’t) been doing this summer.

Exhibit A: The Sunflowers that Grew Way Taller than I Expected

Exhibit B: Actually, They’ve Grown about a Foot Since I Took These Photos

Exhibit C: But the Fuchsia and Hummingbird Feeder Are So Pretty

Exhibit D: And This Heirloom Variety of Basil with Little Bitty Leaves is Awesome

Exhibit E: But My Four or Five Tomato Plants (Who Can Even Tell Anymore?) Have Turned into One Great Big Tomato Bush

Exhibit G: Tomatoes. YUM.

Exhibit H: This is, Technically Speaking, a Garden

Exhibit I: See How My Neighbor Finally Decided to Trim the Side of My Hedge that Faces His House? I Totally Can’t Blame Him, as I Got Pretty Sick of Those Branches Hitting Me in the Face when I Was Mowing the Lawn, Although that’s Been Less of a Problem Since I Hired the Kid Up the Street to Mow My Lawn

Exhibit J: Do You Think the Neighbors are All Like, “YOU Go Tell the Widow Lady to Trim Those Hedges.” “No, YOU.” “No, YOU.”?

Exhibit K: I Like Mint in My Iced Tea, but Not Quite this Much

Posted by adrienne at 09:05 PM | Comments (11)

July 19, 2008

The Neverending Salad, or Why I Believe Barbara Kingsolver May Be Dangerous Even Though I Don’t Believe She is Screwing Up America

After many years of debating the potential merits of signing up for one of those deals where you pay in the spring to get a box of produce every week from a farm during the growing season, I finally decided to take the plunge and used part of my tax return to enroll to get produce from Windy Meadow Farms this year.

There are two reasons I did this:

#1-Deb raved about the produce she got from Windy Meadow Farms last year in her weekly kidsoutandabout.com newsletters.
#2-I read Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver.

In his book 100 People Who Are Screwing Up America, Bernard Goldberg lists Barbara Kingsolver as offender #73. I don’t think Kingsolver’s screwing up America, but I do think she may be a bit dangerous. I read Animal, Vegetable, Miracle on the recommendation of several friends, I went on about the book so much that my boss read it, and now my boss and I are BOTH growing vegetables in our yards and getting produce from Windy Meadow Farms. Do you see how subtly Kingsolver works her magic?

The produce from Windy Meadow Farms is, indeed, awesome. I get two big bags of it every Wednesday—potatoes, radishes (and, wow, I think I ate more radishes this year than I have eaten in my entire life previously), lettuces, spinach, herbs, zucchini, summer squash, cucumbers. I have been able to eat ice cream whenever I want this summer because outside of that, all I can eat is vegetables and the fruit I keep insisting on buying at the farmer’s market on Saturdays. Sometimes I feel like I’m so full of vitamins that my eyes must be glowing. I’ve been learning lots of new ways to prepare and eat vegetables, too, from dreamy Mark Bittman in my new second-favorite cookbook, How to Cook Everything Vegetarian. (First favorite: How to Cook Everything by Mark Bittman. Duh.) Mostly, though, I make salad. Lots and lots and lots of salad. I eat salad almost every day, but since the lettuces and other fixins change with what happens to be around when I make my salads, I don’t get tired of them. Currently, I’m eating a salad of romaine lettuce, the neverending radishes, sweet onion, cucumber, sliced almonds, and sunflower seeds. Yum. The salad I finished yesterday had red leaf lettuce, the neverending radishes, sweet peas (out of my backyard garden), string beans (also out of the backyard garden), sliced almonds, and sunflower seeds. (Sliced almonds and sunflower seeds are almost as common as lettuce in my salads.) Also yum.

At some point this summer, I will be getting beats from Windy Meadow Farms. I believe my exposure to beats has been limited to eating one pickled one once. Mr. Bittman tells me I will love them. Barbara Kingsolver says so, too.

Books mentioned:
Bittman, Mark. How to Cook Everything: Simple Recipes for Great Food. NY: Macmillan, 1998. (HC: 9780028610108, PB: 9780471789185, and HUZZAH, a 10th Anniversary HC edition coming out in November: 9780764578656)
Bittman, Mark. How to Cook Everything Vegetarian: Simple Meatless Recipes for Great Food. Hoboken, NJ: Wiley, 2007. (HC: 9780764524837)
Goldberg, Bernard. 100 People Who Are Screwing Up America (and Al Franken is #37). NY: HarperCollins, 2005. (HC: 9780060761288)
Kingsolver, Barbara, with Steven L. Hopp and Camille Kingsolver. Animal, Vegetable, Miracle: A Year of Food Life. NY: HarperCollins, 2007. (HC: 9780060852559, PB: 9780060852566)

Posted by adrienne at 10:15 PM | Comments (11)

July 14, 2008

Guess Whose Mother-in-Law Gave Her the Atari She Found When She Was Cleaning Out Her Basement?

Oh, yeah, that was MY mother-in-law. I have the Atari all set up and was playing Frogger tonight. (And, seriously, I went through my whole life thinking I couldn’t set up electronics, but I’m turning out to be a freaking mechanical genius in my old age. Not only did I set the Atari up myself, but I did it WITHOUT INSTRUCTIONS.) I totally got to the third level on Frogger, but then the traffic got too heavy and things didn’t go very well for my frog.

I also played Space Invaders.

As a side note, I used to think that Facebook Frogger was pretty fun, but it’s nowhere near as good as the original Atari version. Just saying.

I’m also just saying that tomorrow night I will be playing Pitfall and Donkey Kong Jr. Yee haw! Take that, unaffordable Wii!

Posted by adrienne at 10:34 PM | Comments (11)

July 06, 2008

Chili, the Fourth of July, and Why Kristen Should Consider Running for Town Supervisor

If you’re from the greater Rochester area, then you know that the name of the town where I live, Chili, is pronounced with long i’s instead of the more traditional—you could even argue correct—pronunciation commonly accepted for countries and peppers. In the summer, though, we go all crazy and call our town’s annual festival the Chil-E Fest.

They do know how to go crazy in a town where Republicans outnumber Democrats seven-to-one.

Speaking of which, the town supervisor we elected this past November was a Democrat. He ran on a platform of, among other things, making the annual Chil-E Fest less lame. Notice how he won; it’s a testament to exactly how lame the Chil-E Fest has been. I live about two blocks from the center of town, where the Chil-E Fest is held, and there are years when it’s taken me by surprise. (“That’s odd,” I’d think. “Why is there a marching band in the front yard?”) Other area towns’ summer festivals are destinations even for people who don’t live in the towns themselves, but when you say “Chil-E Fest” to most Rochesterians, they assume you’re talking about some kind of chili cook-off and wonder why it’s being held in the summer.

Anyway, you should note the way I say our town supervisor WAS a Democrat, because he stopped being a Democrat when he switched to the Republican party this past April. It was a controversial decision. Tammy, for instance, was ready to storm Town Hall. I told her we should wait, though. This man, after all, promised us a less lame Chil-E Fest, and I felt we should reserve judgment until the big event.

Unlike past years, this year’s Chil-E Fest was held on the Fourth of July, so I now feel free to judge this man.

The Chil-E Fest was, in fact, less lame.

First of all, EVERYONE was there. People were parking on my street and walking there—that’s how many people there were. I know this kind of thing bothers the people on Park Avenue, but I see it for the opportunity it is: maybe next year I’ll be able to charge people to park in my driveway.

One of the biggest downfalls of past festivals has been the quality of the fried dough, which was horrid. Tammy got some this year, though, and she reports it was good. (“As good as Frontier Field?” I asked. “I don’t know about that,” Tammy said.) I didn’t feel confident enough to risk the 1000 calories to try it myself.

The proof was in the fireworks, though. We had fireworks on the Fourth of July itself. Take that, downtown. We are just as cool as you—MAYBE EVEN COOLER. I watched the fireworks from the Wegman’s parking lot, where there were many, many drunk people (including the lady that parked next to me and got out of the driver’s seat HOLDING A MARGARITA, and all I could think was, “Why don’t I have a margarita?”). I didn’t mind the drunk people so much, and the display, I have to admit, was very nice.

Not as nice, though, as the one Kristen and Terry had in their backyard at their annual summer party the very next night. Here is how Kristen and Terry’s display improved on the Chili display:

1. The fireworks themselves were every bit as impressive as the Chili ones.
2. I knew—or had at least been introduced to—all the drunk people.
3. There was a bonfire that had been started with a dead Christmas tree, complete with decorations.
4. There was karaoke.
5. There were prizes, one of which I won. ROCK!

Right now, I’d say Supervisor Dunning is On Notice. He lost points for switching parties, but he gained some back for a slightly less lame Chil-E Fest that still was still not as fun as a party my friends threw in their backyard. Let me put it this way: if my leaves don’t get picked up on a regular basis this fall, Supervisor Dunning is in trouble.

Posted by adrienne at 08:24 PM | Comments (9)

July 03, 2008

Brainradio: A Challenge from Sara

The other day, Sara issued a challenge over at Read Write Believe to post about what songs we write to and why, and then she even offered us an opportunity to earn BONUS POINTS. Of course, if Sara was like, “Adrienne, let’s jump off a bridge.” I’d be all like, “Really? Okay. Which one?”

So obviously I am posting my playlist.

Unlike Sara, I am one of those writers who very often writes to music. The music generally has to be something I know well (otherwise it distracts me with its novelty and newness), and often changes depending on what I’m working on. Here’s what’s in my current writing playlist and why I think it helps me write:

“Finest Worksong” by R.E.M.
“I’m talking here to me alone.” R.E.M. makes LOTS of good songs for working, and I will often listen to R.E.M. albums when writing, but this particular song contains a lot of good advice.

“This Sentence Will Ruin/Save Your Life” by The Born Ruffians
“Deadline, Deadline, Deadline. Write that essay, pray on the windowsill.” Pretty self-explanatory, that.

“Don’t Stop” by Fleetwood Mac
“It’ll be, better than before.” You can only hope.

“Does This Mean You’re Moving On?” by The Airborne Toxic Event
“And the funny thing is it has no end.” We all need to be reminded to move on at some point.

“I Should Be Allowed to Think” by They Might Be Giants
“I should be allowed to shoot my mouth off.” Seriously, does it get better than a catchy song with a strong literary reference?

“Ahab” by MC Lars
“Hey, Ishmael, can I call you annoying?” YES! Another one! It’s also a good reminder not to take myself so freaking seriously.

“Song for the Dumped” by Ben Folds Five
“So you wanted to take a break?” I get a lot of energy out of the anger in this song when I’m stuck.

“This Year” by The Mountain Goats
“I am going to make it through this year if it kills me.” Or this essay or story or revision or whatever. I like the bit of narrative in this song, too.

“Extraordinary Machine” by Fiona Apple
“I still only travel by foot, and by foot it’s a slow climb.” If Fiona can fight her way through despair, so can I.

As for my BONUS POINTS, here’s my mix minus the two songs that weren’t on iTunes. (BOO iTunes.)

Posted by adrienne at 07:54 AM | Comments (8)

June 18, 2008

Please Look After this Cat. Thank You.

So this is what I found in my office the day I came back from vacation:

He came with this note:

I feel like I recognize that handwriting, but I don’t know where from. This mystery is vexing, especially since I think I love this puppet more than all my other puppets combined (if you’ve never seen my office, you might not realize this is saying something, but I find that being a children’s librarian is an excellent cover for my enduring fondness for puppets). Hopefully whoever gave me this wonderful gift reads this blog, because I FREAKING LOVE TUXEDO CAT. Whoever gave him to me should know.

Here we are together:

It was love at first sight for Tuxedo Cat and me. He is, by far, the highest-quality puppet I own. He’s made out of beautiful, soft cloth. He has great eyes that look like he’s really seeing something. I’ve never used a full-arm puppet like this before, but I’m amazed how expressive he can be with relatively simple movements. I’ve even been working on a voice for him. I’m trying to make it sound a little meow-ish, but in reality it might be a combination of Snarf and Fran Drescher. I’ll have to keep working on it.

Posted by adrienne at 11:37 PM | Comments (9)

June 17, 2008

I Went to Buffalo and All I Got Were a Bunch of Lousy Dents in My Brand-New Car

You know, I’ve always stuck up for Buffalo. They get some snow, yes, and they killed a president. They have a bit of a problem with money. Being a city is HARD, though, and Buffalo has a lot of cool things like that fun little food place in their central library and the Albright-Knox and a nice theatre district and the Allentown Arts Festival. If not for Buffalo, we’d all be eating sweet-and-sour chicken wings. We wouldn’t have sponge candy from Fowler’s. So every once in a great while they need to call in the National Guard to deal with the snow. So what? They don’t get earthquakes. Much.

I had the great good fortune to go to Buffalo yesterday to celebrate Jen being sworn into the NYS Bar. WOO, JEN! I can tell you from watching Jen work hard that getting to the point of being sworn into the Bar is no freaking joke. It’s also had her home twice in the last several weeks, so I’m a fan of this particular event on many levels.

Hail, though? Not so much.

We were having drinks with friends at Shango when the second hail storm started. Outside, it was that weird it’s-not-quite-dark-but-not-quite-light where there’s still light in the sky but the streetlights are on, and the hail fell for a few good minutes. I caught a small piece in my hand; some of the larger pieces were about the size of a jawbreaker. I was fully expecting the storm to be followed by a plague of locusts or perhaps a zombie uprising that would force us to become a rag-tag band of survivors and lock ourselves up in the bar to wait out our troubles, just like Shaun of the Dead. I think between Jim and I, we’ve probably seen most of the zombie films currently available on DVD. We would have had the situation covered. It didn’t come to that, though. We had another round, waited out the storm, and then went home in our freshly dimpled cars. Maybe next time. You never know with Buffalo.

Posted by adrienne at 10:30 PM | Comments (8)

June 14, 2008

Why Going to the Ocean is Better than Going to Work

That one’s pretty much self-explanatory. I just wanted to rub it in. It was great to spend some time yesterday sitting in the sun, breathing all that good air, listening to the waves, reading, and swimming. Plus, when I was swimming, nothing tried to eat me. I also didn’t drown. That qualifies as a Good Day.

I’ve been having other adventures. It’s fun here in Lake Worth.

Posted by adrienne at 08:45 AM | Comments (4)

June 09, 2008

“The Best Lack All Conviction”

Oh, my, did I fall down on the 48 Hour Book Challenge. There’s always next year. In the meantime, you should check out the winners over at MotherReader’s site. WOO to them, and to MotherReader for putting this together. Every year, it gets bigger and cooler.

Posted by adrienne at 09:48 PM | Comments (0)

June 08, 2008

48 Hour Book Challenge—First Post, Late

Okay, so I started my 48 hours yesterday morning at 7:00am. At that time, I was three essays into the new David Sedaris book, which I had to finish before I could move on to a new book. I had some other things going on, but I have finished the Sedaris, and now I’m moving on to The Adoration of Jenna Fox. I have some other things I know I have to do today, but I’m mostly hoping that I manage to beat the two books I managed to read last year. If I make three books, huzzah. Hope to report again soon….

Posted by adrienne at 12:41 PM | Comments (3)

May 26, 2008

Memorial Day Mad Lib, a Group Effort Faithfully Compiled by Lucas

“A Concert Review”
-from Mad Mad Mad Mad Mad Libs

Throughout last night’s glass, the cheering for the performance of Pearl Banana was so deafening, you had to hold your pianos over your walls. Many well-known glasses are calling it the fuzzy concert of the decade. For their opening number, the band played their hit song, “Gobbledygook,” followed by their soft rendition of “I Can’t Get No Sleepy.” Then, as a tribute to the Beatles, they played several loogeys from the hit album, Sergeant Pepper’s Lonely Uvulas. Unfortunately, throughout the performance, lead singer Paige moved about the stage like a caged mongoose, singing at the top of her baskets, giving this critic a terrible butt ache. However, the concert ended with the audience standing on their sandals and applauding heartily, forcing the group to come back for three trees before the car finally came down.

Posted by adrienne at 08:39 PM | Comments (2)

May 23, 2008

Adrienne and Tammy Go to the Prom

So Tammy talked me into going with her to chaperone her school’s prom. This prom had many things my own high school prom did not. Numero uno, Tammy:

(She was all like, “Why are you taking a picture of me getting out of the car?” And I was all like, “Tammy, it’s your FIRST PROM.”)

Because the prom was at Artisan Works, there was also all kinds of cool stuff all over the building, such as this swell 50s-esque kitchen:

(Whenever I’m trying to be good, I fold my hands. In this case, I was trying to be a Good Example, which isn’t nearly as easy as it looks.)

And a fainting couch:

And this sculpture of a mannequin with an egg on its boob:

(This sculpture REALLY BOTHERED Tammy, so I had to take her picture with it.)

And this cool stained glass thingy:

Of course, what I was most envious of was the tray of magically-reappearing cupcakes:

Mmmmm.

After a while, though, I’d seen all the girls’ pretty dresses, and I was full and cold and tired and completely ready to go home. I didn’t go to bed until sunrise when I went to my own prom. I’ll be in bed before midnight tonight, as well I should be.

Posted by adrienne at 10:45 PM | Comments (11)

May 16, 2008

Quotable Friday

“I’m not much interested in moons—ours, Jupiter’s, whoever’s. Going to Mars doesn’t excite me. In fact, I’m pretty lukewarm about the whole solar system. For me, the farther away, the better. Stars. Galaxies. Quasars. That’s what makes me tingle.”
-Will in Smiles to Go by Jerry Spinelli (from the ARC)

Posted by adrienne at 09:12 PM | Comments (0)

May 15, 2008

Sometimes We All Have to Eat Our Words

Seriously. That is cool.

Posted by adrienne at 10:27 PM | Comments (9)

May 13, 2008

I’m Not Sure I’d Ever Clean Any of the Floors in My House if My Cat Didn’t Periodically Throw Up on Them

Tonight I made a trellis with netting and stakes for some of my bean plants. This involved the use of two tools—a hammer and a staple gun. I am not sure that I have ever even held a staple gun before today, and it look me a while to figure out how to use it. *I* am the reason the company etched “EXIT” into the metal with a big arrow pointing to where the staples come out, because for a while I was afraid to pick up the staple gun, as I wasn’t at all sure that I wouldn’t grab it in the exact spot where the staples come out and wind up impaling my hand.

The second problem was that it took me a while to figure out that there weren’t any staples in the staple gun. *I* am the reason the first item on the manual’s troubleshooting page suggests checking to make sure that the staple gun is loaded.

Don’t even get me started on loading the staple gun. I managed it after, like, ten minutes, when I consulted the manual. Again.

I am not a builder. The trellis is crooked, and I have grave concerns about what might become of it if we were to have a sudden windstorm. Still, I managed it, and I don’t want to say this too loudly, but it was kind of fun.

I’ve also grown kind of fond of the staple gun. I shouted the first time I made a staple come out of it, but then, I laughed.

Posted by adrienne at 09:46 PM | Comments (10)

May 11, 2008

“Muncha! Muncha! Muncha!”

In the past, I’ve grown tomatoes and cucumbers and a few herbs in my yard, but this year I’m trying to go a little bigger with the produce. I figure I can mow the lawn or take care of gardens, and, while I don’t particularly mind mowing the lawn, in the end, the gardens are more rewarding, as they leave me with all kinds of good food to eat.

Check out my seedlings:

Aren’t they sweet? I’m so proud of them.

I’m also kind of proud of this little baby bunny that is living in my yard this year:

Sorry for the quality of the photo. I had to take it through the window, as the little baby bunny doesn’t find me nearly as enchanting as I find it. Of course, I’m also kind of worried about my little baby veggies.

So is my neighbor.

My neighbor has had that trap up for, oh, I’d say five years now. As far as I know, he’s never caught any of the many rabbits that have lived around our yards. (Note the little tree starting to grow inside. At one time, my neighbor thought there was ONE rabbit. Tee hee, but I wasn’t going to be the one to enlighten him on that.) The little baby bunny has wisely built his den on the other side of the house.

I’m hoping the little baby bunny and I can find some middle ground, where he gets to eat a little and I get to eat a little. It’s hard to strike a bargain when he runs away every time I walk outside, though. I’ll keep you posted.

[Editor’s Note: Whenever I use quotes in my blog titles, I am referencing/quoting something, which I usually like to leave unstated. You people know how to Google. Anyway, just now, I feel compelled to mention that I borrowed the title of this entry from the title of a picture book by Candace Fleming and illustrated by G. Brian Karas that is a must-read for any gardener, particularly suburban gardeners.]

Posted by adrienne at 10:49 AM | Comments (9)

May 09, 2008

Things I Used to Believe About Bruschetta that I No Longer Believe

I used to be kind of intimidated about the idea of making bruschetta, but then I made some and now I’m kind of addicted to it. There’s something about bruschetta that’s very satisfying. It’s crispy, there are vegetables cooked just right on it, and it involves the deliriously wonderful combination of olive oil and garlic. According to Mr. Bittman (who I love) in How to Cook Everything: Simple Recipes for Great Food (which I love), “bruschetta is grilled (or broiled, or even toasted) bread, rubbed with garlic and drizzled with olive oil. There are two requirements: Good coarse, crusty bread… and good olive oil.”

Hm.

Having good olive oil in the house is a basic requirement for getting out of bed, and, in my mind, at least, a drizzle of olive oil is what lets bruschetta have a cool Italian name instead of being called an open-faced sandwich (which is what bruschetta *is*, of course, but “open-faced sandwich” doesn’t sound nearly so exotic). I take exception with the crusty bread, though. I know Mr. Bittman is suggesting that we use Italian bread or a nice baguette, and, presentation-wise, baguettes are the way to go. Still, I’ve been making bruschettas out of my everyday whole-wheat bread here at home, and they’ve been awesome.

I also used to think that chopped tomatoes were essential to the bruschetta process, but since you can’t get a decent tomato this time of year, I’ve been making bruschetta with onions, yellow peppers, garlic, and capers. Yum. If anything, I’d say that CAPERS are essential to bruschetta because they come in those little bitty jars. And they’re very Mediterranean. And yummy.

I think I’ll go make some now….

Posted by adrienne at 09:46 PM | Comments (7)

May 07, 2008

Lucas on Shoes

[Conversation with Lucas during our recently-reinstituted weekly breakfast at the Leaf and Bean.]

Me: Did you see my new sandals?
Lucas: [Looks.] They’re nice.
Me: I bought three pairs of shoes last weekend!
Lucas: [Raises eyebrows.]
Me: I know. Your mom was supposed to get one pair of sandals, and I was supposed to get one pair of sandals, but your mom couldn’t find any shoes she liked and I found three pairs I liked.
Lucas: [Rolls eyes.] Girls like shoes.
Me: Yeah, well, your mom and I do.
Lucas: [Rolls eyes.] I always look at the design on the sneakers before I buy them. [Shrugs. Takes sip of chocolate milk.] Did I tell you about the doughnut tree I got for my Webkinz?

Posted by adrienne at 10:39 PM | Comments (7)

May 05, 2008

“So You Wanted to Take a Break”

I want to believe that if one is attuned to one’s body and its needs, then all will be well. You know, things like that you’ll crave foods that contain vitamins your body needs and that your body will give you discernable signs if something is suddenly, say, going wrong in your spleen. I started clinging to this particular belief when I was living with a lot of evidence that this isn’t always so, when my husband was sick with cancer and so much of what was going on made no sense at all. My theory about the human body made sense to me at the time, but I was also chronically sleep-deprived.

As I get older, I still put effort into trying to take the path of listening to my body, but I can’t help but notice that my body’s kind of a moron. It’s my immune system. I shouldn’t call it a “moron,” because that’s judgmental, and I think my immune system really has something along the lines of panic disorder. It’s on my mind because the other day I unwittingly spent way too much time near a balloon and have been suffering ever since. I am severely allergic to latex, so much so that I carry around an EpiPen™ just in case being too near a balloon for too long sends me into anaphylactic shock, which is, basically, my immune system having a panic attack. There is nothing inherently dangerous about a balloon. Unlike most common phobias, such as spiders or snakes, being balloon-phobic doesn’t even have an evolutionary benefit. When I get too near latex, though, my body thinks a perfectly appropriate response is to kill me. The only reason it hasn’t killed me yet is because I take a lot of drugs to stop it, which my immune system is none-too-happy about. Even a few days after this recent exposure, it’s still waiting for some kind of break in the drugs so it can really freak out. I can tell because even with the drugs, my eyes are swollen and my nose itches and I have to keep using my inhaler. I have kept my body far away from other things my immune system is afraid of, like penicillin and bananas, but it’s holding a grudge about this balloon thing. It’s unreasonable. My allergist has been working with my immune system on its issues with dust, roaches, fur, and tree pollens, but he won’t even talk to it about the balloons because it’s pointless. I can’t say I disagree. Maybe we should try some kind of group therapy.

Posted by adrienne at 10:48 PM | Comments (13)

April 30, 2008

“Three Bucks, Two Bags, One Me”

In honor of my rapidly approaching trip to NYC, I thought I’d share some of my favorite children’s books about the big city.

From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler by E.L. Konigsburg
This is the book that convinced me that someday I was going to have to visit NYC. It’s one of those books I reread periodically, and every time I do, I am ten years old and want to live at the Met. Every time I go to the Met, I am ten years old and want to live at the Met. Basically, I want to live at the Met. I’m not sure if I’m going to even manage a visit this trip, though.

Seen Art? by Jon Scieszka and Lane Smith
This book always reminds me of how much I love visiting The Starry Night and all the rest of the art at the MoMA. I’m a sucker for Scieszka and Smith, but this light introduction to some high-concept art is a winner. I am hoping to hit the MoMA this trip. The museum owns one of my all-time favorite paintings, Hide-and-Seek by Pavel Tchelitchew (sorry, that reproduction is completely crappy—the real thing is amazing), which the rat bastards hardly ever hang, but you never know. (Sometimes I call and ask if it’s hanging before I decide whether or not I’m going to the museum. Is that bad?)

Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing by Judy Blume
When I first read this book, I had no idea that people lived in buildings with elevators, but once I realized that people did, I decided that was the life for me. I was really pissed off when Peter’s parents decided to move out of the city in Superfudge.

Fireboat by Maira Kalman
Doesn’t this book make you cry? It makes me cry.

While I’m in the city, I’m going to be catching up with Susan from Chicken Spaghetti and visiting the Ambrose. And oh, yes. I will also be seeing the mysterious Lil Baby K. I will not, however, have Internet access, so I’m afraid it will be a few days without blog entries.

Question: I have to leave in an hour. Is now a good time to pack?

Disney’s Hannah Montana Magic 8 Ball: It is decidedly so.

Okay then.

Posted by adrienne at 02:51 PM | Comments (8)

April 28, 2008

An Interview with My Newest Magic 8 Balls in an Effort to Better Understand Why I Keep Watching the Tourment that is Lost

Over the last few months, I have acquired three new magic 8 balls to add to my collection.

#1-Dr. Freud’s Therapy Ball
I found this one myself at Archimage. Love that place.

#2-Disney’s Hannah Montana Magic 8 Ball
Pat and Hannah got me this one. Thanks, guys!

#3-A Newer Model Sarcastic Magic 8 Ball
My dad found this one in Florida, and it has better sayings than the original. Score! Thanks, Dad!

I believe an interview is in order.

Question: Do normal people survey their magic 8 ball collection when making major decisions?

Dr. Freud’s Therapy Ball: Talk about your mother.
Disney’s Hannah Montana Magic 8 Ball: Signs point to yes.
Sarcastic Magic 8 Ball: You wish.

Question: Yeah, then why didn’t any of you stop me from watching the last episode of the first season of Lost tonight? Because I don’t think that was good for me.

Dr. Freud’s Therapy Ball: Let’s channel that anger.
Disney’s Hannah Montana Magic 8 Ball: Rock out the no.
Sarcastic Magic 8 Ball: Whatever.

Question: When I was making oatmeal chocolate chip cookies as a way to cope with my intense feelings over the situation with Walt, I noticed that the oven needs cleaning. Could one of you take care of that for me tomorrow?

Dr. Freud’s Therapy Ball: Less guilt more smiles.
Disney’s Hannah Montana Magic 8 Ball: Smokay dokay.
Sarcastic Magic 8 Ball: What do you think?

Question: I’m not sure it’s a good idea to let Disney’s Hannah Montana Magic 8 Ball near the oven.

Dr. Freud’s Therapy Ball: Free your inner child.
Disney’s Hannah Montana Magic 8 Ball: The fans say yes.
Sarcastic Magic 8 Ball: Oh, please.

Question: Disney’s Hannah Montana Magic 8 Ball, I wasn’t really talking to you that time.

Disney’s Hannah Montana Magic 8 Ball: Don’t count on it.

Question: Okay. Well, last one. Do you think I’m going to get to watch Michael inflict some major harm on the Others in season two of Lost? Because, if so, it might be worth watching.

Dr. Freud’s Therapy Ball: Sorry, time’s up.
Disney’s Hannah Montana Magic 8 Ball: My sources say no.
Sarcastic Magic 8 Ball: Forget about it.

Damn.

Posted by adrienne at 10:49 PM | Comments (7)

April 17, 2008

“When He Lunged onto the Hood, She Stopped to Tell Him She’d Been Wrong”

My house sits on the inside of a curve. One of my favorite winter pastimes is waiting for the day when someone takes the curve too quickly and hits my across-the-road neighbor’s mailbox. They’re pretty philosophical about it over there since it happens every year. Sometimes twice. A year or two ago, it got so bad that for a few weeks their metal mailbox rested atop a pile of snow on the side of the road. When the snow melted, they put up one of those one-piece Rubbermaid mailboxes, which seems to be vastly more resilient than anything else they’ve owned.

My keen interest in the neighbor’s mailbox woes has obviously built up some bad Adrienne mailbox karma, because when the snow finally decided to melt this year, this is what I realized my own mailbox had become:

Mea culpa on the rust, but I think that huge dent in the side might be the result of someone hitting it with something. I want to say it was teenagers with a baseball bat, but that can’t be. I’m the neighborhood widow. Widows have privileges. One of them is that even the rowdy local teenagers are supposed to have enough compassion to not be smashing up your freaking mailbox.

The world in my head is such a happy place.

Posted by adrienne at 01:12 AM | Comments (6)

March 16, 2008

Things I Have Been Doing that Are the Opposite of Getting Ready to Go on a Big Trip, Including Rationalizations

1. Watching Season One of Lost
As if I need to rationalize this. My life is this annoying thing that prevents me from watching more episodes.

2. Reading A Great and Terrible Beauty by Libba Bray
I’ve been wanting to read this book forever and Libba Bray is going to be at TBF and I realized yesterday that the copy I checked out three weeks ago was due today and that it wouldn’t renew because someone has it on hold and I knew I could read the book all in one day so I went ahead and (almost) did. It really got in the way of watching Lost.

3. Hanging Out with Emily and Tim, Who Were in Town for the Weekend
I never get enough time with Emily and Tim, and they are so much fun, even if hanging out with them did prevent me from watching Lost.

4. Eating the Country Fried Steak Emily and Tim Made Us for Dinner
Because, you know, I couldn’t be rude. And it’s not like I eat country fried steak every day. I could have watched Lost while we ate, but Certain Parties indicated that this would be rude.

5. Going to the Leaf and Bean for Breakfast
Because, you know, I have to eat. And we always have to go to the Leaf and Bean the morning Emily and Tim leave. That’s the rule. They do not have a television at the Leaf and Bean.

6. Going to the Leaf and Bean for Lunch.
Shut up. They don’t have a television at lunchtime, either.

7. Exercising at the Y
See plethora of sedentary activities in #s 1-6.

Good thing I have tomorrow off work. Speaking of which, here’s the video to the best song off the new They Might Be Giants album, Here Come the 123s:

Posted by adrienne at 09:19 PM | Comments (6)

March 12, 2008

Packing It In

So I’ve started to mull over what I’m going to bring on my two-week PLA Road Trip Extravaganza next week. I really want to be one of those people like my friend Jennifer who always travels with just one itty bitty bag, and in that itty bitty bag she somehow has everything she needs and looks fantastic every day of her trip.

That is so not me.

I pack, like, my entire house, and somehow I still manage to leave behind whatever it is I really need to keep myself together while I’m away. I love to travel, but I hate to leave my stuff behind. And I really hate not having all my clothes to pick from every morning when it’s time to get dressed. I also worry endlessly about possibly running out of paper/pens/reading material while I’m away, so I stuff the nooks and crannies of all my bags with pads of paper and pens and pencils and CDs and books and magazines and, if I bring my laptop, DVDs. Most of the time I don’t even touch a fraction of the things I bring, but it makes me feel infinitely better to know they’re around. Just in case. A lot of packing is just in case. Just in case I get dirty or just in case I’m cold or just in case it’s wet or just in case the weather decides to shape up and get warm. This trip will be a particular challenge because part of it will require professional clothes and part of it will require doing-whatever-comes-along clothes, and the trip’s just so darned long. There’s a lot of just in case in two weeks.

Posted by adrienne at 08:31 PM | Comments (18)

March 02, 2008

Miscellaneous Fun and Games

Last week, Susan at Chicken Spaghetti pointed out a new-to-me blog, Rex Parker Does the NYT Crossword Puzzle. Basically, the guy does the puzzle every day and then posts what he thinks about it—was it easy, was it hard, was it interesting, did the theme hold up, that kind of thing. It comforts me to know that other people have opinions about the puzzles and think about them more than I do. Of course, I’m the one who purchased a wedge of Edam at Wegmans yesterday exclusively because Edam is in the crosswords so frequently and I got to wondering what it tastes like. It’s good.

In other entertainment news, last season, Robot Chicken did a sketch about how the studios were going to start turning board games into movies. They did this full trailer for Hungry Hungry Hippos: The Movie, which was hysterical, because who would make Hungry Hungry Hippos into a movie?

Well, there I was reading EW yesterday, which informed me that, hey, look, Hasbro and Universal are teaming up to make movies out of board games. (Here’s the Variety article.) The first game they’re going to tackle is Monopoly. After that, Candyland and Battleship are on the table. The Hippos are a Hasbro property, but, apparently, someone on the inside’s watching Robot Chicken and doesn’t want the company to look foolish.

It’s hard to know what to think about this. Clue: The Movie is, obviously, one of the best films of all time. (“I am your singing telegram!” Thanks to YouTube, I can now easily watch that scene over and over and over, which makes me oddly happy. It was so much harder to do back in the day when I would watch it repeatedly on the old beta machine.) Pirates of the Caribbean was good, and it was based on a theme park ride. Stranger things have happened. Still, MONOPOLY? No one even knows how that game ends. Maybe that’s what the movie will be about.

Posted by adrienne at 09:36 PM | Comments (8)

March 01, 2008

Putting on My Big Girl Pants

One of the benefits of our annual sabbatical week at WPL is that we’re allowed to wear jeans to work. Everyone gets excited about this except me, because when I hear “jeans,” I think, “Can’t I still wear a dress?” But I made an exception and wore jeans to work on the Wednesday of my sabbatical last week.

Everyone commented on them. Everyone.

Not only was it probably the first time I’ve ever worn jeans to work, it was the first time I’d worn jeans at all in at least half a year. Maybe longer. Up until a couple weeks ago, I didn’t even have a pair at home that fit. I probably still wouldn’t if I hadn’t decided that I wanted to become a responsible car owner, and I realized that I wasn’t going to be putting air in my tires and checking the oil in whatever I wore to work.

After this realization, it took me a couple weeks to work up the nerve to go out and buy some jeans. And even after that, it took me a couple more weeks to decide to do anything to my car that involved possibly getting dirty. My plan was to check the air in my tires the day I wore my jeans to work, but I put it off again.

This has been so much of my life since Brian died. I come up against yet another new thing I need to learn or do, and I put energy into avoiding learning or doing whatever the new thing happens to be.

Monday was a beautiful day for February in WNY this past week. It was about 40° and sunny, and when I got home from work, I decided that dammit I was going to check the air in my tires, which I did. In the dress I wore to work and my nice red wool coat. I hadn’t used the tire gauge in years, and when I had it in my hand, I couldn’t remember exactly how it worked or how to use the compressor in the garage or how to let air out of the tire if I overfilled it. When I crouched down, though, and took the cap off the tire nozzle, I remembered everything Brian taught me when he gave me the gauge years ago, like he was watching me and telling me what to do. My tires needed air; I filled them.

After that, I went inside and put on my jeans and came back out and checked the oil in the car. Then I went out into the yard and dragged all the cut-up pieces of the pine that fell over in January’s wind storm out to the road, another thing I’d been avoiding. It took about half an hour. I was surrounded by the smell of mud and sap, and I uncovered a patch of grass unaccountably growing under a pile of pine. It snowed the next day, of course, but I felt a little closer to spring.

I like taking care of my car, and I like my new jeans. I’ve been wearing them when I don’t have to, even when I’m home sometimes and could be wearing my yoga pants. The next time I have to do something new and I’m avoiding it because I’m worried about screwing it up, I need to remember this about my jeans and the tires and the mud. Most of the time, this is how it works out, just fine.

[I should note that Chuck has helped me on the road to responsible car ownership, so a big WOO HOO to him. It’s also worth noting that Robin put on her big girl pants just this past Friday. Maybe it’s something in the air.]

Posted by adrienne at 09:45 PM | Comments (14)

February 27, 2008

Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire

Many mornings, Lucas likes to tell me things that his friend—let’s call him Pinocchio—said at school the previous day. It starts like this, “Aunt Adrienne, do you want to hear what Pinocchio said yesterday?”

In my head I think, “The pathological liar? Oh, yes, do tell.”

What I say is usually something more along the lines of “sure.”

Pinocchio has told Lucas things ranging from that he has 400 Webkinz at home to that his name is going to be in the next Guinness Book of World Records for “something he can’t remember.”

Pshaw.

Most of the time, I tell Lucas that I have my doubts about Pinocchio’s latest whopper and leave it at that. Lucas has his doubts, too. He doesn’t tell me he does, but I think that’s why he keeps telling me what Pinocchio has said. He’s trying to figure it out. Lucas is oddly trusting for someone whose narration of facts and events must regularly be called into question. I half wonder if Pinocchio’s stories are in response to Lucas’s own. If only I could be a fly on the wall of that classroom...

Posted by adrienne at 11:14 PM | Comments (3)

February 22, 2008

And I Thought My Disguise Was Working So Well

I found this in the Children’s Room last weekend. Maybe it’s from the same kid who put in the suggestion about the brownies, but, really, what sequence of events led to this? I have no idea. It made my day, though.

Speaking of things I found in the Children’s Room that made my day, a few weeks ago, I walked in on this. No matter what I do, I cannot keep that alligator under control.

Posted by adrienne at 07:54 PM | Comments (8)

February 15, 2008

PLA: Five Weeks Away!

So is anyone else in the Kidlitosphere heading out to Minneapolis for PLA 2008 at the end of March? I’m going, and I am very much looking forward to it. First of all, Meg Cabot is speaking at a luncheon on Tuesday, March 25th. (Chuck is soooooo jealous that I get to see her live. Sorry, Chuck, but this does kind of make up for the fact that you get to meet LBSS before I do. Kind of.) Second, I will be leading a Talk Table discussion about homeschooling on Thursday, March 27th from 10:30-11:45 AM. Speaking of homeschooling, PLA will be the first time I’ll see my book on the shelves at the ALA Store. You’ll know me because I’ll be the one grinning and taking pictures.

Posted by adrienne at 04:49 PM | Comments (6)

February 13, 2008

“Girl, Why Not Take Out the Trash?”

“I’m really determined to become agoraphobic, so it’s a huge deal for me to actually put on shoes and find my keys to go break bread with someone whose face I’ve never seen.”
-From “The Bronze is Dead. Long Live the Bronze!” in Will the Vampire People Please Leave the Lobby? by Allyson Beatrice

Lately, I’ve been on this kick where I’m feeling motivated to put on something besides my yoga pants and leave the house to be among other people a little more frequently. I love my yoga pants, and I love being home, but I worry about letting introversion rule my life. I worry about letting anything rule my life, because nothing rules my life except me.

I’m not worried about that right now, though. Right now, I’m worried about my yoga pants.

It’s true that I have several pairs of yoga pants, but when I’m talking about my yoga pants, I am always really thinking of one particular pair that I’ve had for about six years and love perhaps more than any other article of clothing I’ve ever owned. They’re a heavier fabric that keeps me warm in the winter and is soft and comfortable without being shapeless. They’re pants that, when they’re dirty, motivate me to do the laundry.

Yesterday morning, I was folding this particular pair of yoga pants when I realized that the fabric is starting to disintegrate in a way I can’t fix. I am disconsolate over this. I knew that what I needed to do was to take them and throw them out right away so I wouldn’t be tempted to wear them anymore, but I couldn’t do it. Right now, they’re folded in a tidy square on the dining room table. Tammy says that we need to go out and buy some new yoga pants, and I know she’s right, but I won’t be able to find another pair of THESE yoga pants. I know; I’ve looked. And do you see how this shopping is going to involve me putting on something besides my yoga pants and leaving the house to be among other people? I don’t think I want to do that anymore.

Posted by adrienne at 08:48 PM | Comments (5)

February 11, 2008

Ella and the Hovercraft

Ella’s going to have to go to the vet’s in a few weeks. We’ll be talking about her weight again, I’m sure. I swear, I don’t overfeed this cat. I hardly ever give either one of my cats treats. Olivia’s taken to making her cat run up and down the stairs a couple times before she feeds him; I’m considering this as an option for Ella.

Posted by adrienne at 10:10 PM | Comments (14)

February 06, 2008

The Eyes Have It

As you know, I am a children’s librarian. One of the things children’s librarians are expected to be is crafty, which I am not. (Well, I am crafty, but not in the making-crafts kind of a way.) I am, however, obsessed with wiggle eyes. You can bet that pretty much any craft I think up for the kids to do is going to involve wiggle eyes. We have a large stock of different types on hand in our supply closet at WPL, including glow-in-the-dark wiggle eyes (which I love so much I have a hard time letting the kids use them), colored wiggle eyes, and my new favorite thing in the world—GIGANTIC WIGGLE EYES.

I know that purchasing things from Oriental Trading is wrong, but every time I get close to deciding that I’m not going to buy anything from them anymore, they come up with some new wiggle eye that we absolutely must have at the library. The GIGANTIC WIGGLE EYES have a diameter of 40mm. If you don’t have a sense of that in your head, check it out on a ruler: when they say GIGANTIC, they mean GIGANTIC. I had the kids use them on their bear face crafts at the end of our 4 and 5 year old storytime yesterday, and they were awesome.

Please feel free to bring this up the next time I go on about Disney or Starbucks. Seriously, I’m a total hypocrite.

Posted by adrienne at 12:06 AM | Comments (17)

February 04, 2008

“That Harsh, Irregular Flame”

In the month or so before Brian died, when I was trying to get used to the idea of him dying, I didn’t really think that I was going to exist after he died. I didn’t think I was going to do anything bad to myself, because that’s not on my list of options, but I regarded the time after Brian’s death the way I now regard being eighty. I know that, in theory, someday I will be eighty, but I cannot wrap my mind around my soul inhabiting an eighty year old body. Similarly, I could not wrap my mind around my soul inhabiting a world where Brian wasn’t.

I’ve changed a lot since then.

Today would have been my fifteen year wedding anniversary. I’ve noted my last few wedding anniversaries, but this one’s kind of gutting me today. For whatever reason, my post-death anniversaries put me in mind of Stanley Kunitz’s poem “The Quarrel.” (Read the poem here.) I think maybe it’s because even though I’ve learned how to live a new life, sometimes I am still just so pissed off that Brian died.

Now I am going to go get the taxes done. Probably wasn’t the best day to schedule that....

Posted by adrienne at 06:40 PM | Comments (18)

January 31, 2008

What Tammy and I Really Like to Do Is Take Pictures of Signs

This is especially true when we find ourselves at the airport three times in one week.

Posted by adrienne at 11:18 PM | Comments (3)

January 28, 2008

Way to Go, FDA!

Last week, I ordered a refill on my Zyrtec from Wegmans, something I do every three or four weeks. The next day, I got a helpful call from someone at the pharmacy letting me know that Zyrtec is now available as an over-the-counter drug and I was going to save myself some money buying it that way. I thought it was awfully nice of them to call, and then I thought that maybe this would be the perfect opportunity for me to stop taking Zyrtec.

I have these stupid thoughts from time-to-time; my allergist talks sternly to me about them, but I can’t seem to give them up. I have this fantasy that I’m going to wake up one day with an immune system that doesn’t periodically try to kill me.

Today isn’t that day. Today my eyes are swelling.

So I decided to go to Wegmans and buy some Zyrtec. When I got there, I learned that Zyrtec is one of these drugs you have to get a ticket for and go pick up at the pharmacy, which I did.

They were out.

Seriously, can someone please explain to me how this system makes any kind of sense? First off, controlling cold and allergy medications doesn’t seem to be slowing up the illegal drug trade, which is, I believe, the goal of the controls. Second, why did they make Zyrtec an over-the-counter drug if they still wanted to control it? What was wrong with that cool system where I told the pharmacy I wanted more and then went and picked up a nice bottle with my name on it the next day? It was working just fine for me.

Tomorrow morning, I’m going to have to go forage for my Zyrtec in the wilds of CVS or Rite Aid. Benadryl (still a fully over-the-counter drug!) will be solving my allergy problems tonight. I suppose I am thankful for that.

Posted by adrienne at 10:22 PM | Comments (5)

January 25, 2008

Non-Verbal Communication

I am a tragic victim of stereotypical non-verbal communication.

I am, in my heart, a shy person, but you can tell that I’m comfortable in a conversation when my speech begins to involve a lot of movement. I start with illustrative gestures and, as I become more absorbed, I use gestures, faces, and sounds in place of the words I can’t always remember when my mind is tripping along.

Ironic, given that I’m a writer and everything.

Anyway, you can tell when I’m uncomfortable in a situation because I start to close up in all the typical ways. I cross my arms, I hunch, I take up less space. When I am watching films that cause me stress (for instance, the Cloverfield/No Country for Old Men double-feature I took in last night), I will start shoving my arms in the direction I want characters to go (AWAY FROM MIDTOWN, YOU MORONS! AWAY! NO! NO! THAT WAY!), and, if things get really dire, I ball myself up in the corner of my seat and watch the action from under the arm I’ve flung over my head.

I’ve developed the presence of mind to notice myself doing these things, but not enough to stop myself from doing them most of the time. Today, for instance, I went back to work, and after I’d been there about an hour, I had to put my hair up because I started getting to that point where I wasn’t sure which high-priority thing I should deal with first. It’s like I start to have anxiety, and all of a sudden I can’t deal with having my hair all over the place anymore, certainly not touching my face. This is completely irrational, but when I tried to tell myself that earlier, my self didn’t care. I threw my hair in a sloppy bun, and then I dug into some work, which made me feel better right away.

Well, it was that or the coffee. Hard to tell.

Posted by adrienne at 10:28 PM | Comments (7)

January 21, 2008

Desert = Dry

One thing I remembered most keenly from my last visit to the Mojave Desert (back when I didn't know it was the Mojave Desert) is that my hair and skin dried out very uncomfortably after I’d been here maybe two days. This visit, I decided to take preventative action, which has included:

1. Drinking plenty of water. Duh.
2. Making sure I eat fresh fruits and vegetables with every meal, which I should be doing anyway. (And, seriously, the oranges here are to die for. I’ve been eating them at every opportunity.)
3. Lotioning up twice a day with Eucerin Plus.
4. Washing my hair only every other day.
5. Consistently using my spray-in conditioner/detangler.
6. Reapplying lip gloss/chap stick at least every couple hours.

This regimen has been great for my skin.

My hair, however, is now officially dry. I never have this problem in my normal daily life, so it’s kind of a novelty, but not so much of a novelty that I’m not annoyed about my hair looking like crap. I thought maybe letting my hair air dry today would help, but that experiment resulted in a pony tail. It was the same story yesterday and is very likely to be the same story tomorrow.

I have a conditioner at home that will fix this (and which I MUST remember to bring with me the next time I visit). The humidity of my native land will also help. The sunny days here are energizing, but it’s hard not to notice how much this environment isn’t into humans—even with all of the layers of illusion and protection the city of Las Vegas has created to keep its residents and visitors comfortable. I feel a little panicky now and again when I think of how far I am from any kind of decent source of fresh water. It helps me understand why they call my lake back home “Great.”

Posted by adrienne at 06:27 PM | Comments (1)

January 20, 2008

Helping Homeschoolers in the Library in the D&C

Here it is. I'm not sure how long the link will stay live.

Posted by adrienne at 11:36 AM | Comments (8)

I Thought We All Agreed That Guy Was Sleeping

You can see some photographic evidence of my adventures in California over at How Daddy Is Doing.

Chuck didn't mention it, but we also saw a jack rabbit while we were at Vasquez Rocks. I guess I thought "jack rabbit" was just another name for "rabbit," but, no, jack rabbits are different. And kind of weird. I don't think I'd cross one.

Posted by adrienne at 04:06 AM | Comments (6)

January 18, 2008

The Mojave Desert

Okay, so I guess I always thought the Mojave Desert was in some other country, but, apparently, it's here. I drove through big parts of it on Tuesday and again on Wednesday. It's pretty, with lots of mountains and tumbleweeds and stuff.

I've never really seen a desert before, but this is what I've learned: the desert is BIG. And dry.

This is the other thing I've learned: Vegas time is more right than Rochester time because in Vegas they have sunshine every day. EVERY DAY. When the sun comes up, my body is convinced it's morning. When it goes down, my body is convinced it's night. It's weird to talk to people at home where this is not the case. Sad, sad Western New Yorkers.

Ah, well, must go get a pedicure now. I'm keeping a very busy schedule here in Sin City.

Posted by adrienne at 12:53 PM | Comments (3)

January 14, 2008

Wirelessless

Yes, it’s true, I’m going off the grid.

I’m going to be visiting Chuck and Kelly while I’m out west, so I may pop up on How Daddy Is Doing. Other than that, though, I’m not bringing my laptop, and I’m not sure what the computer/Internet situation is at my aunt’s house, so I’m not anticipating being online much. Instead I’m bringing a couple books, a stack of magazines, and a crossword puzzle book. I’m planning on doing some work on my newest project, but I’m going to be kicking it old school with a pen and a notebook. I prefer writing first drafts by hand anyway.

That said, I doubt I can manage a WHOLE WEEK without blogging. I’ll probably find a way to get online at some point, even if it’s just for a quick hello. Or two. We’ll see.

Posted by adrienne at 03:49 PM | Comments (8)

January 13, 2008

Packing

I am thinking of this post over at How Daddy is Doing this evening because I am doing my typical freaking-out-before-a-trip thing. Every time I think of everything I mean to do before I get on the plane at 6:00am on Tuesday, especially the packing, I start panicking.

I could TOTALLY use one of Kelly’s lists right now.

Even so, I know that by 6:15am, when we’re safely in the air and I am happily doing a crossword puzzle while listening to my iPod, I won’t care about any of it anymore.

The rest of you might consider handling me with soft words of encouragement until then. With all of the traveling I’ve done, you’d think I’d be better at this.

Posted by adrienne at 10:04 PM | Comments (3)

January 12, 2008

See What the Writer’s Strike Is Forcing Me to Watch?

Solidarity and everything, but when are my shows going to be back on? I blame greedy executives. Stupid, stupid greedy executives.

Posted by adrienne at 10:03 PM | Comments (3)

January 09, 2008

Happy Windsday

Yesterday, it was 65 degrees and sunny in Rochester.

This was clearly a sign of the apocalypse, which I celebrated by wearing a short-sleeved shirt and getting a cherry chocolate milkshake at Hank’s.

Even yesterday, the news was saying that the weather was going to change suddenly and that there was going to be some severe wind, but you know how it is with the weathermen: blah, blah, blah. It’s not like native western New Yorkers to pay much attention.

I had trouble sleeping last night and had been up for a few hours when I started to doze just before 5:00 this morning. That’s when the wind hit. I never heard wind make so much noise. I kept wondering if I should go into the basement in case it was a tornado.

It wasn’t a tornado, but woo boy did it make a mess. Today the temperature was 45 degrees, and one of the pine trees that used to stand in my side yard is now laying down at an angle pointing to the driveway (instead of inside my bedroom, thank God, as that was another option). The tree was still standing when I left the house this morning, which was good since I burst into tears when I saw it when I got home from work.

I think I’m going to go to sleep and see what happens tomorrow.

Posted by adrienne at 10:01 PM | Comments (6)

January 06, 2008

I Must Be Experiencing a Vitamin Deficiency Because I Went to Wegmans Today and Bought a Bunch of Tropical Fruit

Avocadoes
I bought two, made them into guacamole, and ate in a way that reminded me why it’s dangerous to make guacamole when there aren’t other people around to notice how much you’re eating all at once. Whenever I eat guacamole, I wonder why anyone ever eats anything else.

Grapefruit
Grapefruit is probably one of my favorite foods. I think this is at least in part because you can only get decent grapefruit for two or three months here in western NY. Last year, when I was in my annual few weeks of eating grapefruit every morning, Lucas decided that he also loves grapefruit, and he has been bugging me for WEEKS to get some. Tomorrow morning, he will be very happy.

Pineapple
Although Lucas will also want to eat some pineapple. Much as I love pineapple, I can’t eat it for breakfast. (Lucas can, but, then again, he’ll also eat sweet pickles for breakfast. He’s such an odd child.) Eating pineapple is like eating sunshine. It makes me feel better when we’re having these endless stretches of days that are short and cloudy.

Posted by adrienne at 09:29 PM | Comments (9)

January 05, 2008

Folding Sweaters, an Alternative

This is a response to Kelly’s post over at How Daddy is Doing—although, Kelly, you may not want to look. It’s bad.

Step #1: Try to convince the cats to let you touch the sweater.

Step #2: Fold sweater in half lengthwise.

Step #3: Fold the arms in.

Step #4: Fold sweater in half the other way.

Step #5: Put sweater on one of the “piles” in the closet.

Step #6: When one of the “piles” falls, find a sweater you forgot you owned and be like, “Hey! I forgot about this sweater! I love this sweater! I am wearing it tomorrow!”

Even I have to admit Kelly’s way is better.

Posted by adrienne at 09:57 PM | Comments (6)

January 03, 2008

“Leave Them Alone, And They’ll Come Home”

You know how sometimes you lose a sock in the wash and so you have this one sock floating around for months and no idea where the other one is? That’s happened to me, except it’s happened with a pair of shoes.

I noticed the shoe was missing a few weeks ago. It happened sometime between the garage door breaking and the car dying. I saw the one shoe sitting alone on the mat next to the door one day and didn’t think much of it. I figured the other one was in the closet and didn’t have time to investigate. When I did investigate, though, no shoe. Then I thought maybe one of my godsons had taken it and put it under the couch or something, so I crawled around on the floor looking underneath and behind everything. Still no shoe. That’s when I took the Little Bo Peep route and trusted that my shoe was just going to show up one of these days.

My shoe has not shown up.

How does someone lose a shoe? I mean, it has to be here somewhere, right? It couldn’t have gotten up and left without telling me. Yet, here I am without one half of one of my favorite pairs of shoes (black clogs, in case you’re wondering). It’s hard to even know how to proceed. I can’t think of anyplace I haven’t already looked for it, and the other shoe is useless without its mate. It’s still sitting there on the mat, looking all forlorn and reminding me every day that there is this thing of value that I have somehow very weirdly misplaced.

What I really want is the shoe back.

Posted by adrienne at 11:17 PM | Comments (13)

January 01, 2008

“I Just Can’t Rid of You Like You Got Rid of Me”

The thing I didn’t tell you when I bought the new car is that I also gave up my cable television.

The decision was mostly financial, but it’s something that had been on my mind anyway. It’s not that I wasn’t enjoying television. Quite the opposite, I love it. That’s the problem. It was eating into time I used to use for other things (Exhibit A: Writing a Book), and, while I still maintain that a DVR is one of the best gizmos out there, it became another one of those things I couldn’t quite keep up with. In the end, I decided that my Netflix account satisfies the same entertainment need for less money with the added benefit of slowing my viewing down every once in a while when I have to wait for the next DVD to arrive in the mail.

I’ve been without the DVR for about three or four weeks. I’ve been watching DVDs and have gone out to see at least four movies, but I’ve also read several books and have been writing like crazy. I’m writing in my journal; I’m catching up on correspondence; I’m trying to write a halfway decent blog entry. For me, the difference was immediate, and thanks to the writers’ strike and a bunch of reruns, I don’t even feel like I’m missing anything. I kind of feel like I flunked being a part of my generation, though, and I know I’m going to miss having the occasional clue about what people are discussing when the subject of television arises. I guess this is part of recognizing my own limits.

That said, someone needs to be in charge of reminding me about this if I ever decide to get cable again.

Posted by adrienne at 07:21 PM | Comments (11)

December 31, 2007

Resolutions

Robin’s talking about the new year and fresh starts over at her blog, which got me to thinking about the best New Year’s resolutions I ever wrote. I reread them, and I still believe in them 100%. I am reposting and reresolving. Over the next 12 months I will:

1. Eat plenty of fried egg sandwiches.
2. Watch plenty of movies.
3. Support the local economy by purchasing food and/or beverage items at the Leaf and Bean on a regular basis.
4. Get my money’s worth out of my YMCA membership.
5. Keep my house untidy.
6. Read every day.
7. Write every day.
8. Work very hard at the last minute to complete my writing assignments within 24 hours of deadline.
9. Let go of hate. It is the path to the dark side.
10. Update watat.com on a daily basis.

Yee haw. That is a good life.

Posted by adrienne at 10:49 AM | Comments (14)

December 30, 2007

Home Sweet Home

The four days between Christmas and today have been filled from morning to night with work and social functions. I got to spend lots of time with a whole bunch of people I love (Hi, people I love!), but oh my gosh it exhausted me. When I don’t get enough unstructured time, I start getting weird, so it felt like a blessing to have today at home to read and do the dishes and drink coffee and putter around. I’ve been more acutely aware this past year that I need to protect my time at home—that I need time to read and to write and to let my mind wander if I want to be sane. I also know some of the world’s coolest people, and I love spending time with them. Finding balance has been one of the things I’ve struggled with most in life. It’s a good struggle, though, a healthy one. Tomorrow I’ll celebrate the coming year with a long, unstructured day at home followed by a long, busy night among friends. If that isn’t a good omen for 2008, I don’t know what is.

Posted by adrienne at 08:33 PM | Comments (0)

December 25, 2007

Merry Christmas Everyone!

Posted by adrienne at 03:17 PM | Comments (5)

December 24, 2007

Look What Arrived Just in Time for Christmas

Wow!

How nerdy is it of me that I am the most excited about the fact that the book has an index? It’s the only part of the book that I didn’t write myself:

Also, look at how nice the layout is:

Someone else did that, too. The biggest thing I learned about the publishing process with this book is that your publisher is just bursting at the seems with people who want to help you make your book the best thing it can possibly be. How awesome is that?

Not half as awesome as 0-8389-0955-3 or 027.6 FUR, but, still, awesome.

One disappointment is that the book doesn’t weigh nearly as much as I’d expect from two years’ worth of work. If it weighed as much as the work I put into it, though, people wouldn’t be able to carry it around, and I still think I could break something with the book in the event I was under attack and had to throw it.

If you really squint, some of you might see your names here:

I would have put more names, but, you know, they said my acknowledgments couldn’t be longer than the book itself. Sheesh. Any particular names that are missing are in the spaces between the lines.

Okay, well, whew. That was a lot of excitement. I guess there’s some holiday or something and I’m having people over and should really think about cleaning the bathroom. Glamorous life of a published author and all that.

Posted by adrienne at 11:46 AM | Comments (15)

December 22, 2007

You Can’t Expect Me to Accomplish a Whole Heck of a Lot on the Shortest Day of the Year

Seriously, it’s already getting dark. Get me a hot chocolate: I’m reading until it’s time to go to the movies. (How else would I celebrate the longest night of the year? Please.)

Posted by adrienne at 04:22 PM | Comments (4)

December 21, 2007

“The Nothing that Is:” Poetry Friday

One must have a mind of winter
To regard the frost and the boughs
Of the pine-trees crusted with snow
-from “The Snow Man” by Wallace Stevens

There must be something of late December in this poem, because I see that I wrote about it on December 22 last year. Whatever, I’ll write about it again. Jay Keyser thinks it’s the best short poem in the English language; it’s certainly one of my favorites. Like Keyser, I love the way the poem keeps you on your toes, asking the reader to think again, look again, consider a little more. Why do more people not expound on the beauty and wonder of the word “and”? Look at how Stevens is using it there: freaking amazing. I love what this poem is about, too—perspective, I think, growing older, learning to see things for what they are instead of what others tell us they should be. It is the poem I’ve been trying to memorize, although with all my unexpected activity over the last few weeks, I’m lagging behind. It might be a good holiday weekend project.

Gina at AmoXicalli is rounding them up today. Woot, Gina!

Posted by adrienne at 11:13 AM | Comments (8)

December 20, 2007

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

The letter “h” is currently being brought to you by the new keyboard on my laptop—the one I just changed MYSELF.

I am feeling so self-actualized right now. Not so self-actualized that I am going to take the itty bitty screwdriver back out to where I found it after an exhaustive half-hour search in the cold, cold garage, but still.

Posted by adrienne at 10:45 PM | Comments (1)

December 19, 2007

THWAP!

I have always believed that driving a car should involve some level of difficulty and discomfort. I saw very few new cars growing up, and, in fact, spent a lot of time riding around in cars whose special features included, say, a door salvaged from another car or the passenger window boarded up with cardboard. My own first car, a 1986 Dodge Charger named Zippy, featured doors that frequently froze in winter so that I had to climb in through the hatch. To me, this seemed a normal part of car ownership.

Today I prefer a car with fully functioning doors, but I retain a basic distrust of automatic and computerized features, a distrust that caused me a great deal of anxiety over the last several months as I slowly began to admit to myself that I was not going to be able to avoid getting a new car for much longer. I am someone who misses the days when I didn’t have power steering or power breaks; I’ve had a hard time imagining myself adjusting to a car whose operation involved a remote control.

This is why I don’t want to tell you about how much I love my new remote control door locks.

I am sure a lot of you are already familiar with the joy of hitting the unlock button enough steps away from your car that you are able to open the door without pausing when it’s snowy outside. But do you know how wonderful it is to be able to unlock the doors before Lucas gets to the car so that you don’t have to listen to THWAP! “Aunt Adrienne…” THWAP! “…the door…” THWAP! “…is locked…” THWAP! every day of your life, wondering if today is going to be the day that he finally manages to break that cheap plastic handle off the door?

Plus, I have a CD player.

Of course, the car also has something called Lockout Protection or, as I prefer to call it, the You Are Such a Moron Feature. This feature prevents the doors from locking if the key is in the ignition. I don’t want to tell you how many times I’ve locked my car doors while the key is still in the ignition, but let’s just say the quality of my life got a little better when I finally took my father’s advice and started carrying a spare key in my purse (which I hardly ever forget, as my purse contains my iPod). Maybe automatic features aren’t as bad as I feared.

Posted by adrienne at 07:50 AM | Comments (19)

December 16, 2007

Rare Kristen Sighting, Plus Video

I see regular watat.com reader and commenter Kristen about once or twice a year outside of the Internets. Last night was it. When she and her husband Terry weren’t stripping, they were telling us about their dog that moos. Sometimes they tell stories, but this one, apparently, is true:

motorcow

Add to My Profile | More Videos

Now I have seen it all.

Posted by adrienne at 03:09 PM | Comments (5)

December 13, 2007

Lucas Knocks Over a Domino Candycane

Posted by adrienne at 09:43 PM | Comments (1)

December 12, 2007

Erasers

The other night, Lucas asked me to check over his math homework. This is exactly the kind of thing I hate to do, but I want to be positive and supportive, so I smiled and said okay. Lucky for me, the worksheet was about estimating weight and mostly required one to say whether things weighed more or less than other things. This involved words and estimation, things an English major such as myself can get into. One of the questions had to do with whether an eraser weighed more or less than two pounds. I believe that the answer is supposed to be “less,” which is what Lucas wrote, but I spent a lot of time thinking it over. Did his teacher mean the kind of eraser one can pull out of a pencil? A Pink Pearl? A chalkboard eraser? A markerboard eraser? The worksheet didn’t say. I suppose this issue has no bearing on the correct answer, but it made me want to go out and find an eraser that weighs more than two pounds.

I didn’t mention any of this to Lucas, of course. I told him that his answers were what I believed his teacher was looking for and pointed out two problems he neglected to do. This is how I approached my own schoolwork back when I had it. It’s no wonder I never excelled in math.

Posted by adrienne at 07:12 PM | Comments (8)

December 10, 2007

Breathe, Adrienne, Breathe

As much as I like to make fun of the Escort and the way it’s pushing 190,000 miles, I kind of love my car. It’s small, it gets decent gas mileage, and I know what to expect from it—important things such as how to operate the windshield wipers and the likelihood of picking up WBER on the radio in different parts of town. I take pride in the car’s lack of features and even appreciate the way I have to shout at passengers to compete with the road noise. These qualities are part of its charm. Less charming is the way it’s been leaking fluids and making strange noises and not providing me with any heat until halfway through my 30-minute commute.

The thing is that this is only the third car I’ve ever owned, and I’ve been driving for eighteen years. (I seriously had to do that math, like, twelve times, and I’m still convinced it must be wrong.) I get kind of attached to my cars, and I don’t like getting rid of them.

The other thing that I learned today is that my car $1400 worth of doesn’t pass inspection. I have been planning on getting a new car this summer, and by “planning on,” I mean, “putting off having to deal with.” Aside from the fact that I love my car, I’m kind of afraid of buying a new one. I was about two steps away from breathing into a paper bag when I was talking to my dad on the phone after I got the news earlier today, and finally he was like, “Adrienne, you have to calm down. Your car’s broken. This happens to people every day.”

I guess that’s true, but, jeez, am I ever having a run of stuff breaking lately. I can take a lot of it stoically, but my car? In December? The day before my birthday?

This is so unfair.

I am solving this problem the way I solve so many of my problems: by consulting the Magic 8 Balls.

Question:
Is it time for me to get a new car?

Answers:
Simpsons M8B: “Mmm…something.” [That doesn’t even make sense.]
Traditional M8B: “Signs point to yes.” [Hm.]
Spongebob Squarepants M8B: “Want to see it again?” [How does this apply?]
Financial Advisor M8B: “Sell real estate.” [Ew. No.]
Shrek M8B: “No, go far far away.” [Okay, I currently have no way to get far, far away. Sometimes I think the Magic 8 Balls don’t really listen.]

Posted by adrienne at 01:45 PM | Comments (14)

December 06, 2007

Lucas and I Celebrate the Domestic Arts

Lucas asked me to make a hat for one of his stuffed animals this morning.

Turned out pretty cute, if you ask me, especially for not quite 7:00am.

Then we ate cinnamon toast for breakfast. I think cinnamon toast may be another of the dying arts, which is a shame.

Posted by adrienne at 07:57 AM | Comments (6)

December 01, 2007

“I Know that Now, That’s Why I’m Staying Here”

The other night when I got home, I dropped my keys when I was getting out of the car, and it took about five minutes of digging under the seats in the dark to find them and then when I got in the house I realized that only one of my gloves—my favorite gloves—was in my coat pocket. The other one wasn’t on the floor and it wasn’t on the porch and it wasn’t on the sidewalk and it wasn’t in the driveway and it wasn’t in my car not even under the seat and it was freezing outside and my car is leaking some kind of fluid and it needs a couple new tires and the breaks are making a noise I don’t like and the inspection’s due and my garage door broke twice in one week and I need a new door opener and I was sick on my day off last week and I just want to sit around my house and read and not have to worry about anything but no, no, I can’t ever do anything I want because everything’s always happening to me.

The next morning I found the other glove in my purse.

Posted by adrienne at 07:10 PM | Comments (11)

November 25, 2007

“And the Funny Thing Is It Has No End,” or Curious George Visits the Webster Public Library and Never Freaking Leaves

One day five years ago, back when I was still the newest librarian at WPL, a guy came into the library and told me how his children had outgrown this big Curious George stuffed animal he’d gotten from one of the stores in Midtown when it closed and asked me if I wanted it for the library.

“Sure,” I said. “Bring it in.”

Five years later, here we are:

Today, I nurse a hatred for this particular incarnation of Curious George that borders on something irrational. I realized I’d crossed a line when my hopes that someday old George would sustain an injury so grievous that we’d have to throw him out recently turned into fantasies about inflicting said injury myself. With a pocketknife. I was considering a lateral slash across the back of his head. I don’t think anyone could fix that.

Why do I hate George so much? Just for starters, he doesn’t have enough stuffing, so he always looks like he’s drunk and doing something lewd, which is one of the reasons I relegated him to the back corner of the room a couple weeks after his arrival. I also put him back there because the children love him, and they most frequently express this love by jumping on George and screaming. Now, I am all for letting kids be kids, but one has to draw the line somewhere.

George also smells—bad, like an amalgam of the snot and dirty diapers and spit and sweat that have been his constant companions these past five years.

I tried to get rid of the germ-ridden disease machine a few years ago, but I wound up caving to everyone complaining about it and brought him back. WHY DID I DO THAT? I ask myself this all the time. It was the second-dumbest thing I’ve ever done at WPL. The first? Saying I’d take him in the first place.

Lesson painfully learned.

Posted by adrienne at 11:15 AM | Comments (21)

November 24, 2007

I Am NOT Jealous of the Enoch Pratt Free Library's Central Children’s Room

So what if they have a water fountain with fish and plants and a sculpture in their Central Library?

At WPL, we have a degenerate monkey:

Our Children’s Room isn’t in the basement, either. So there.

For real, though, I love this shelving the folks at Enoch Pratt have built on the walls for the fiction and magazines:

I want to have some shelves like this built in the back of the Children’s Room at WPL for the comics and the magazines, so they can all live together in harmony on something attractive, durable, and timeless. I’m envisioning three ranges of regular adjustable shelving about as tall as me flanked by a row or two of the slant shelving on each side. I like the idea of housing these collections near each other because I think they appeal to the same kinds of kids. I also want to put these collections in the quieter/sane area of the room I’m trying to create for older kids (by “older,” I mean third-fifth graders who, I understand from the comments they write me, are sick of having to deal with the preschoolers when they visit the library).

Someday.

Posted by adrienne at 07:51 AM | Comments (4)

November 23, 2007

Jason Contemplates the Sad Circumstances of Edgar Allan Poe’s Death: Poetry Friday

The cemetery was closed when we visited, and Jason suggested we consider climbing over the fence. I said NO. It’s a nice view from the wall, though, eh?

Posted by adrienne at 10:16 PM | Comments (6)

November 22, 2007

This Thanksgiving I Am Thankful for the Urine of a Dormouse

If you ever find yourself in Baltimore, I highly recommend visiting the Walters Art Museum and its most excellent CHAMBER OF WONDERS. The museum is in a lovely part of town where you can also see the Mount Vernon Place Methodist Church (built on the site where Francis Scott Key died), another phallic monument to George Washington, and a lot of wrought ironwork all over the place. Admission to the Walters is free, and there is a lot to see. What you will really want to do, though, is spend all your time in the CHAMBER OF WONDERS. The CHAMBER OF WONDERS is designed to look like the kind of room a wealthy person in the 19th century would have kept to store all the stuff he gathered during his many travels. (For those of you in the Rochester area, George Eastman’s entire house is pretty much a CHAMBER OF WONDERS, although it isn’t quite as much fun because they don’t let you touch as much stuff there.) My favorite thing in the CHAMBER OF WONDERS, by far, is a book called The History of Four-Footed Beasts and Serpents* by Edward Topsel:

In this three-volume set, you can learn about unicorn sightings, sure, but you can also learn all the medicinal properties of dormouse fat and urine:

Tell me that isn’t the best thing ever. It is the best thing ever, and all three volumes are like that. These days, even the reprinted set is out of print, and used copies cost something crazy like $500, but you can go ahead and spend as much time as you want reading the books in the CHAMBER OF WONDERS. For free. If that isn’t something to be thankful for, I don’t know what is.

[*Is Mr. Topsel suggesting that there are four-footed serpents? I didn’t have enough time to read all three volumes cover-to-cover, so I’m not sure. Intriguing, though, isn’t it?]

Posted by adrienne at 10:20 AM | Comments (3)

November 21, 2007

The Other Queen

In my normal daily life, I don’t eat at chain restaurants. This goes double when I travel, with one exception: a road trip means that I must, simply MUST, stop and get a Blizzard at the DQ.

In fact, I have a favorite DQ. It’s on Route 15 in Pennsylvania, after you’ve been driving an hour or two. Here’s a photo:

(That’s Jason in the picture. If you don’t let him jump around every once in a while, he gets troublesome.)

For as many times as I’ve stopped at this DQ, I can never remember what town it’s in, but that’s part of Route 15’s charm. The next bend in the road could bring just about anything—another place that sells fireworks, another porn shop, or my very favorite DQ in the whole wide world. Look, they even have this informative sign on the back of the bathroom door:

My favorite is step #2, “Apply soap.” So important!

This trip, I got my usual, a vanilla Blizzard with Oreo cookie. Yum. I also wound up eating a #6 value meal at Wendy’s and okayokayallrightidrankcoffeeatstarbucksbutiwassocaffeinedeprived. All in all, it wasn’t much of a trip for cuisine.

Tomorrow, though, if you’re lucky, I might tell you about the CHAMBER OF WONDERS, which is now officially my favorite place in Baltimore.

Posted by adrienne at 09:31 PM | Comments (1)

November 20, 2007

Sick Days

Hello, Friends. Sorry for my unplanned absence. I’ve been ill these last two days, although I feel like I’m coming out of it. I hope to resume normal blogging (and life) tomorrow.

Posted by adrienne at 04:56 PM | Comments (11)

November 16, 2007

“We’re Taking this Back, Way Back, Nineteenth Century Style:” Poetry Friday

And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each purple curtain
Thrilled me—filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating
“‘Tis some visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door—
Some late visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door;—
This it is, and nothing more.”
-From “The Raven” by Edgar Allan Poe

Ah, yes, one of my favorite poems from when I was a small child. I offer it to you in honor of the trip I’m taking to Baltimore this weekend, where, I hope, I might see good old E.A.P.’s gravesite. It seems appropriate.

And just in case you’re wondering, the stanza I’ve quoted above is the best one in the poem. I studied literature in college, so I can tell you that this is a fact derived from scientific studies performed by literary researchers using high-tech bestology equipment. It has something to do with using the word “purple” in a description of a feeling everyone has had at some point in their lives. Sadly for our narrator, it isn’t all in his head. OR IS IT? Yeah, I’m not going to debate that one. Honestly, I don’t care. I love this poem because the meter and rhyme and strong images combine to create and sustain a wonderfully dark, questioning mood. Everyone makes fun of this poem, but read it aloud. It has power. Rock on, E.A.P.

[Kelly's doing the roundup over at Big A little a today. Check it!]

Posted by adrienne at 12:05 AM | Comments (8)

November 07, 2007

“I Get the Strangest Looks from that Bitchy Crowd”

I live in a town where Republicans outnumber Democrats seven to one. I am a registered Democrat, which is, you know, whatever. I don’t love the Dems wholeheartedly. I’ve voted several times for Green Party candidates, and I also very occasionally vote for a Republican. Yesterday I even voted for a Marxist (mostly because I wanted to lodge my protest against the candidate I knew would win—the Marxist had no chance—but still).

Yesterday my crazy little conservative town voted in the Democratic candidate for Town Supervisor.

Woo hoo!

There were some good reasons for the conservative people of Chili to vote for David Dunning. Our current Supervisor, Tracy Logel, screws up really basic politician stuff, things like acknowledging her constituents and not speaking of them with contempt in public. I have written her several times about issues (a couple of times when she was still on the Monroe County Legislature), and she’s never made any kind of attempt to let me know that she cared at all about what I thought. That’s because she doesn’t care, of course, but I expect my elected officials to at least pretend they care. Besides that, Ms. Logel has some crazy ideas about how Chili should be developed.

As far as I can tell, Future Supervisor Dunning has thoughts a lot more in line with my own about how things should be happening in Chili, little things like not calling people names in public forums. All told, he’s pretty conservative, which is cool. Our Supervisor doesn’t need to bring about world peace. Like most people, I want my town to spend money sensibly and pick up the leaves on the side of the road before the snow falls. I would prefer that some thought went into the town’s growth. I feel optimistic that these things might be part of the new administration, and I just really, really love seeing the voters do something a little wacky. Go democracy!

Posted by adrienne at 11:46 AM | Comments (3)

November 05, 2007

Overheard at the Allergist’s

A boy of about five years wails after he gets his shot. “It really hurts!”

His mother, who doesn’t seem to notice that her son’s anger is as bright as his blond hair, murmurs something about how it can’t hurt that badly.

“It does!”

Because we all go through this every week, the nurse has a cold pack waiting, which she lays on the child’s arm. “Does that make it feel better?”

“Not at all.”

I’m with the kid on that one.

Posted by adrienne at 05:06 PM | Comments (4)

October 31, 2007

This is Just to Say

I have given
Lucas
a cupcake
for breakfast,

one with
orange frosting and
bat and
ghost sprinkles.

Forgive me
it’s a holiday
and I
wanted one too.

My apologies to WCW.

For some reason, Lucas was all hyper this morning. There was much jumping up and down and singing of The Chipmunks’ version of “Witch Doctor.” Lucas wrote another book (“The Peeps in The Haunted Mansion”), and he puzzled over how anyone could be scared of skeletons (“They’re just dead bodies without skin and blood and organs and stuff. And, by the way, I know how they make dead people into mummies, but I can’t tell you right now because it’s too gross.”). He virtually sang “Happy Halloween!” to the crossing guard when we got to school, and then he ran toward the building so fast that he almost neglected to open the front door before attempting to enter.

I’m glad I’m not a schoolteacher most days, but today I am doubly glad.

Posted by adrienne at 10:20 AM | Comments (6)

October 28, 2007

Proselytizing Pens

Everyone knows that the number one best writing utensil is a Flair pen by Paper Mate. I like Flairs because they come in fun colors and write well in almost any circumstance. They also don’t bleed through the paper (I’m looking at you, Ultra Fine Point Sharpies). A Flair is a great pen to keep in your bag and use for things like writing lists and random notes and drafts of essays in your notebook.

Tammy got me hooked on the Flairs, and she also got me hooked on these EnerGel pens by Pentel. I normally prefer blue ink, but I like the black in this pen—and check out the purple! What I love about the EnerGels is that they feel just right in my hand and make a smooth, steady line, even when I’m sitting sideways in a chair with my notebook propped up at an angle on my lap (which I do not advocate as it is not ergonomic, but this is nonetheless the way I often find myself writing).

As someone who still does a lot of writing by hand, a pen I really like is a wonderful luxury, one of those little things that makes life good.

Posted by adrienne at 08:27 AM | Comments (6)

October 22, 2007

The Book

See? I wasn’t making it up.

Posted by adrienne at 06:37 PM | Comments (20)

October 21, 2007

Public Speaking: A Comparison/Contrast

Very seldom does a week go by in which I don’t spend some of my time speaking in front of other people. Most of the time, these people are preschoolers and their grateful caregivers, and the subject matter involves things like “The Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly” and “Little Bunny Foo Foo.” Most often I’m in my little blue rocking chair in the Story Room at the library, where everything’s just the way I like it. I’ve had a nice breakfast, some wonderful coffee, and I feel comfortable and happy.

Other times, I do professional presentations for other adults at a conference or meeting or what-have-you. I did one just this past Friday on homeschooling at the NYLA Annual Conference, in fact. I’m so glad I did it: a lot of my friends came (thanks, friends!), the conference organizers were excessively good to me, the audience was kind and asked interesting questions, and I enjoyed being able to talk about homeschooling for a while. That said, the anxiety I endure leading up to one of these events is hideous. For weeks, it’s been interrupting my sleep. This past week was the worst. I hardly slept at all, and I’m still sore from how tense I got. I know people walk into conferences and conference presentations with certain expectations, but I am never sure what those expectations are and if I’ll manage to meet them. Basically, I’m in a strange place talking to a bunch of people I don’t know. It gets easier, but, still, I fret a lot.

That is why today I have a big plan that involves yoga and coffee and puttering and enjoying our freakish good weather. Ah, nice.

Posted by adrienne at 11:26 AM | Comments (3)

October 17, 2007

Life with Lucas

It isn’t quite light out yet. Lucas decided that we should turn off all the lights in the house except the Halloween ones and listen to the Chipmunks’ Christmas CD, so that’s what we’re doing. As if that child does anything more interesting when he goes to school.

Posted by adrienne at 07:17 AM | Comments (4)

October 14, 2007

Talk of the Weekend

New glasses:

New skull:

New wolf:

In spite of my multiple assurances that all the coolest people are myopic, he is not entirely pleased about the glasses. Ah, well, who is?

Posted by adrienne at 04:36 PM | Comments (5)

October 12, 2007

I’ve Got a Fireplace, Who Could Ask for Anything More?: Poetry Friday

Last Friday, I was wandering around Wicker Park and Bucktown in a sundress, comfortably shopping and eating good meals and sipping coffee.

Today, I am home. It is 45° and rainy—40 degrees cooler than last week and ever-so damp. I am instituting a variation on my Fall Health and Fitness Regimen:

1. Mix up some chocolate chip pumpkin muffins.
2. While they’re baking, turn on the fire.
3. Wonder why the couch isn’t closer to the fire.
4. Move couch closer to the fire. Notice how much easier this makes getting around the room. Wonder why it wasn’t always like this.
5. Light a few candles.
6. Get your fuzzy blanket, a pile of books, and your laptop (yay, wireless!).
7. Take chocolate chip pumpkin muffins out of the oven. Put “several” on a plate.
8. Make some hot chocolate.
9. Take your goodies to the couch, wrap up in a blanket, and log on to read the Poetry Friday roundup over at Two Writing Teachers.

Okay, today’s looking better.

Posted by adrienne at 12:06 PM | Comments (10)

October 07, 2007

Reality Calls at 4:30am

I took a shower before I went to bed and didn't even get to sleep long enough for my hair to dry before I had to get up in an attempt to make my plane. (What’s my motivation? Oh, yeah, THAT.)

Posted by adrienne at 06:03 AM | Comments (4)

The Conference

When people at home asked me why I was going to Chicago, I got so I started saying “a conference” and leaving it at that. I didn't want to have to try to explain (again) why I was so excited about flying somewhere to meet all these people I knew from the kidlitosphere.

The 1st Annual Kidlitosphere Conference turned out to be even better than I thought it would be. Everyone was fun and interesting and nice. At first it was surreal to see the faces and hear the voices of people whose writing voices I’ve gotten to know, but after a while I started integrating the images I’d had in my head with the reality in front of me. And there was so much to talk about—what software we’re all using, how we approach our work, what our goals are, some of our favorite blogging moments, what we’re reading, what we’re watching, pigeons, appendixes, and when were going to go get some coffee already. I am so glad I came, so glad to meet the people I already knew, and so glad to meet the people I didn't know. I am definitely going to have to figure out a way to get to the conference in 2008.

Plus everyone kept complimenting my bag. That was awesome.

Posted by adrienne at 01:13 AM | Comments (13)

October 05, 2007

Today I Thought I'd Go Ahead and Pick Up Some New Stuff for the House at the Art Institute of Chicago

This for over the front door, obviously:

A new set of windows for the dining room:

Some Corning Glass, also for the dining room:

A new desk:

And something a little subtle for the yard:

Posted by adrienne at 12:22 AM | Comments (5)

October 04, 2007

Red Bird, Red Bird, What Do You See?

I see an Odd Half-Woman-Half-Chicken Kind of Thing looking at me.

Odd Half-Woman-Half-Chicken Kind of Thing, Odd Half-Woman-Half-Chicken Kind of Thing, what do you see?

I see a Disembodied Head with Wings looking at me.

Disembodied Head with Wings, Disembodied Head with Wings, what do you see?

I see Adrienne taking pictures of us. That’s what I see.

(No disrespect to Marc Chagall. I’m a fan, and I like this piece.)

Posted by adrienne at 09:24 AM | Comments (11)

October 03, 2007

“And When You’re Out of Fuel, I’m Still Afloat”

My Usual Weekday Morning
6:00am – Wake up (no alarm), go downstairs, unlock front door, sit on couch with cats. Usually fall back asleep.
6:50-7:10am – Tammy drops off Lucas and a latte from the Leaf and Bean. Commence morning routine.
8:30am – Leave for school if walking.
8:40am – Leave for school if driving.
9:00am – Drive to work.
9:30am – Start working.

This Morning
5:00am – Alarm goes off. Hit snooze.
5:09am – Alarm goes off. Hit snooze.
5:15am – Get up, stumble to bathroom, take shower with light off.
5:30am – Realize must turn light on. Finish getting ready.
5:40am – Freak out, finish packing.
6:00am – Leave house, stop at ATM.
6:20am – Arrive at airport.
7:00am – Through security—YES! There is time for coffee and an Egg McMuffin.
7:01am – Hear final boarding call for flight. Think “FINAL BOARDING CALL?!?!?!”
7:02am – Give up on breakfast. Sprint to terminal.
7:20am – Plane leaves gate.
7:30am – Pilot announces that we are going to spend the next half hour sitting on the runway.
7:40am – Finish cursing.
8:10am – Plane takes off.
8:30am – Obtain ridiculously small cup of watered-down orange juice from the flight attendant. Am truly grateful while thinking fondly of the coffee and breakfast sandwich that must surely await me in PA.
9:00am – Plane lands in Philadelphia. (Yes, I had a layover in Philadelphia. I know it’s stupid, but the flight was cheap.)
9:10am – Realize that the only adequate sustenance in the terminal is at Auntie Anne’s. Love cinnamon pretzel. Bear hideous coffee. Dream of eggs.
9:25am – Realize the airport doesn’t have WiFi. Sulkily read Entertainment Weekly until connecting flight starts boarding.

I didn’t wind up eating again until I bought a bag of dark chocolate peanut M&Ms at a drugstore in downtown Chicago. I made up for all of this with a bottle of Sam Adams and a deep dish Hawaiian pizza at Giordano’s.

I love Chicago.

Posted by adrienne at 11:25 PM | Comments (3)

October 02, 2007

Things I Am Participating in that I Am Excited About

Some of you have duly noted the way I’m all behind on everything all the time lately. Part of the reason is that I’m overcommitted, but, seriously, I can’t give anything up. It’s all so exciting! Here are just a few of the things I’m looking forward to in the coming months:

The 1st Annual Kidlitosphere Conference
Back in June, Robin had this crazy idea to host a shindig so a bunch of us kidlit bloggers could hang out IRL, and look at what it’s turned into! I’m flying to Chicago tomorrow, and the conference itself is on Saturday, which leaves me a few days for exploring the city, shopping, and going to museums. Someone has to keep the economy going. The weather forecast for Chicago is 80° and sunny. Rough.

NYLA
I will be speaking about homeschooling for the Youth Services Section at the Annual New York Library Association Conference on Friday, October 19th at 8:00am. I’m not sure “exciting” is an entirely accurate way to describe my feelings about this event; “waking up with nightmares in the middle of the night” might be better. If any of you attend my talk, that would be cool. One of my nightmares involves no one coming. Of course, another of my nightmares involves a LOT of people coming. Other nightmares revolve around equipment failures and me forgetting what I want to say, but I’ve never had prophetic dreams before—no reason to believe they’re starting now. Right?

Blogging for a Cure
If any of you don’t know that I lost my husband to cancer a few years ago, you haven’t been paying attention. When I learned that author Grace Lin’s husband Robert died of cancer at the end of August, my heart went out to her. That experience, that grief… it’s unspeakable. I’m sorry to know that someone else is going through it. Anyway, it turns out that a lot of hearts were feeling for Grace and Robert long before Robert’s death. Robert’s Snow is a long-standing project that benefits the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute. What’s more, in an effort to give bloggers an outlet to show their support, Jules at 7-Imp has organized Blogging for a Cure to showcase the illustrators who are donating pieces of art to this year’s effort. I’ll be featuring four illustrators here on watat.com over the next couple months. They’re exciting illustrators, and I’m grateful to Jules for the opportunity to participate in something so hopeful.

Cybils
I’m also going to be participating in this year’s Cybils. I’d been wanting to get involved but didn’t take the plunge until Eisha from 7-Imp asked me to serve on the Judging Panel for the Non-Fiction Picture Book category, which is thrilling. I think some of the most interesting work for kids is happening in non-fiction picture books, and I’m just happy to be participating in this whole wonderful grassroots effort.

My next report will be live from Chicago. Talk about exciting!

Posted by adrienne at 07:34 PM | Comments (8)

September 28, 2007

Song Meme

MotherReader tagged me for this meme approximately five hundred million years ago, but it’s better late than never and all that. When I got down to it, I was surprised by how many songs I dislike or can’t remember, but the whole thing was fun to mull over. I think I may have spent a lot of my senior year listening to Led Zepplin.

Loved It!
Liked It
HATED IT!
Don't Remember It

Top 100 Hits of 1991

1. (Everything I Do) I Do It For You, Bryan Adams - THIS was the top song of 1991? Seriously? For real, for real?
2. I Wanna Sex You Up, Color Me Badd
3. Gonna Make You Sweat, C+C Music Factory
4. Rush Rush, Paula Abdul
5. One More Try, Timmy T
6. Unbelievable, EMF
7. More Than Words, Extreme
8. I Like The Way (The Kissing Game), Hi-Five
9. The First Time, Surface
10. Baby, Baby, Amy Grant
11. Motownphilly, Boyz II Men
12. Because I Love You (The Postman Song), Stevie B
13. Someday, Mariah Carey
14. High Enough, Damn Yankees
15. From A Distance, Bette Midler
16. All The Man That I Need, Whitney Houston
17. Right Here, Right Now, Jesus Jones
18. I Adore Mi Amor, Color Me Badd
19. Love Will Never Do (Without You), Janet Jackson
20. Good Vibrations, Marky Mark and The Funky Bunch Featuring Loleatta Holloway
21. Justify My Love, Madonna
22. Emotions, Mariah Carey
23. Joyride, Roxette
24. Romantic, Karyn White
25. I Don't Wanna Cry, Mariah Carey
26. Hold You Tight, Tara Kemp
27. You're In Love, Wilson Phillips
28. Every Heartbeat, Amy Grant
29. Sensitivity, Ralph Tresvant
30. Touch Me (All Night Long), Cathy Dennis
31. I've Been Thinking About You, Londonbeat
32. Do Anything, Natural Selection
33. Losing My Religion, R.E.M.
34. Coming Out Of The Dark. Gloria Estefan
35. Here We Go. C+C Music Factory
36. It Ain't Over 'Til It's Over, Lenny Kravitz
37. Where Does My Heart Beat Now, Celine Dion
38. Summertime, D.J. Jazzy Jeff and The Fresh Prince
39. Wind Of Change, Scorpions
40. P.A.S.S.I.O.N., Rhythm Syndicate
41. The Promise Of A New Day, Paula Abdul
42. I'm Your Baby Tonight, Whitney Houston
43. Love Of A Lifetime, Firehouse
44. Fading Like A Flower (Every Time You Leave), Roxette
45. This House, Tracie Spencer
46. Hole Hearted, Extreme
47. Power Of Love-Love Power, Luther Vandross
48. Impulsive, Wilson Phillips
49. Love Is A Wonderful Thing, Michael Bolton
50. Rhythm Of My Heart, Rod Stewart
51. Things That Make You Go Hmmmm..., C+C Music Factory
52. I Touch Myself, Divinyls
53. Tom's Diner, DMA
54. Iesha, Another Bad Creation
55. Something To Talk About, Bonnie Raitt
56. After The Rain, Nelson
57. Play That Funky Music, Vanilla Ice
58. Temptation, Corina
59. Can't Stop This Thing We Started, Bryan Adams
60. I Can't Wait Another Minute, Hi-Five
61. 3 A.M. Eternal, The KLF
62. Time, Love and Tenderness, Michael Bolton
63. Saideness Part I, Enigrna
64. Around The Way Girl, LL Cool J
65. I'll Be There, Escape Club
66. Cream, Prince and The N.P.G.
67. Now That We Found Love, Heavy D. and The Boyz
68. Show Me The Way, Styx
69. Love Takes Time, Mariah Carey
70. Cry For Help, Rick Astley
71. The Way You Do The Things You Do, UB40
72. Here I Am (Come and Take Me), UB40
73. Signs, Tesla
74. Too Many Walls, Cathy Dennis
75. Crazy, Seal
76. I'll Give All My Love To You, Keith Sweat
77. Place In This World, Michael W. Smith
78. Something To Believe In, Poison
79. Wicked Game, Chris Issak
80. Get Here, Oleta Adams
81. Round and Round, Tevin Campbell
82. Silent Lucidity, Queensryche
83. I'm Not In Love, Will To Power
84. Piece Of My Heart, Tara Kemp
85. Real Real Real, Jesus Jones
87. Just Another Dream, Cathy Dennis
88. Everybody Plays The Fool, Aaron Neville
88. Strike It Up, Black Box
89. Rico Suave, Gerardo - For sentimental reasons. Tammy will understand.
90. Disappear, INXS
91. Groove Is In The Heart, Deee-Lite
92. All This Time, Sting
93. The One and Only, Chesney Hawkes
94. O.P.P., Naughty By Nature
95. Freedom 90, George Michael
96. I Saw Red, Warrent
97. Miles Away, Winger
98. Do You Want Me, Salt-N-Pepa
99. The Motown Song, Rod Stewart
100. Shiny Happy People, R.E.M.

Find your graduation year here.

Posted by adrienne at 09:48 PM | Comments (11)

September 26, 2007

One Plus One Equals Two

1. Every time I see my gynecologist, she asks me if I’m making sure that I get my three servings of dairy every day.
2. Everyone knows that supporting locally-owned businesses is an easy way to help ensure the long-term economic health of one’s community.

That’s why it’s okay that I stopped at the Corn Hill Creamery on the way home from my 1-9 shift, picked up three containers of ice cream, and then met Tammy at my house, where we sampled the flavors and discussed them at length. If you live in the Rochester area and don’t know about the Corn Hill Creamery, I must enlighten you. It’s a place in Corn Hill Landing (where, I should note, there is also a swell Thai restaurant) that serves homemade ice cream. As if that weren’t enough, they also make their own waffle cones, which are light but sturdy and oh-so-tasty. Instead of using a marshmallow, they use a Hershey’s Kiss to stop the drips from coming out the bottom of the cone. Is that not brilliant? Of course it is! They also have really fun flavors. Tonight I got Cherry Cherry (self-explanatory, but I freaking love cherry ice cream), Chocolate Orange Chip (also fairly self-explanatory, this tastes kind of like one of those chocolate oranges you can buy and whack on a table so that it falls apart in tasty little wedges), and Chocolate Crunch (not quite like it sounds, this is chocolate ice cream and vanilla ice cream with swirls of the chocolate crunchies they use in ice cream cake—essentially, it’s ice cream cake you scoop instead of slice, which may just make it my new favorite ice cream).

You know, maybe it’s time for seconds.

Posted by adrienne at 11:07 AM | Comments (8)

September 24, 2007

“Oh Brave New World”

“You know, a human can go on living for several hours after being decapitated.”
“You’re thinking of a chicken.”
“What did I say?”
-Creed and Dwight in “Grief Counseling,” The Office, Season 3

This weekend, I spent a lot of time hiking up mountains and canoeing and lolling about admiring the fall colors, which gave me plenty of time to consider what I’d be DVRing with the new programming season hitting high gear this week. It’s weird to go from not watching television for several years to having so many programs I’m excited about, but there you go. Here is my hot list:

The Office
This is my favorite show. I love this show so much that I’ve been thinking of buying it on DVD. To give you a sense of what this means, I need to tell you that I’ve never purchased a DVD in my life, so much as whole seasons of a television show. I. Love. The. Office.

Heroes
I watched all of season one over the last couple weeks, and I am so hooked. I’m apprehensive that season two might not rock as hard as season one, but I’m going to enjoy finding out. (Note: The Office is set in a paper company. A paper company also features strongly in Heroes. Coincidence? I think not.)

Jericho
I still haven’t managed to watch all of season one, but I like what I’ve seen. I am a complete and total sucker for apocalyptic/survival stories.

Beauty and the Geek
Shut up.

Ugly Betty
I started getting hooked on this show back when I was going to the Y to ride the exercise bike while watching The Office this past winter and spring (before I got television in my home again). Ugly Betty plays in the same timeslot, so I’d watch it during the commercials. Even those little bits grabbed me, so it must be a good show. (I’m going to start watching season one on DVD, probably tonight.)

Reaper
It kind of sounds like Angel to me, but Kevin Smith directed the pilot. I’m in.

Pushing Daisies
Jen’s boyfriend tells me this is going to be THE show of the fall, and so I am caving to peer pressure and watching it. I am skeptical, but I also like what I’ve read/seen about it.

How I Met Your Mother
Another one I plan on watching on DVD real soon. You know, because I have a lot of time to devote to watching DVDs. Right.

Posted by adrienne at 08:44 PM | Comments (15)

September 20, 2007

Inadvertent Blog Vacation

Obviously, I am not keeping up with my blogging duties. Maybe I’ll blog about some of the things I’ve been doing instead of blogging when I get back.

“When you get back?” you ask, the question in your voice.

Yes, it’s true. Lynn, Tammy, and I are leaving tomorrow for a women’s retreat-type-thing in the Adirondacks where we will do things along the lines of hiking and canoeing. The place we’re going is supposed to be “relaxing,” by which they mean there is no Internet access or cell phone reception. In other words, we will be a group of beautiful women in the middle of nowhere with virtually no ability to communicate with the outside world. That doesn’t sound relaxing; that sounds like the plot of a horror film.

This is how it could happen.

After everyone gets a little goofy at the wine tasting reception tomorrow night, we all go back to our cabins to giggle and braid each other’s hair. Just as one woman finishes telling a story about a series of murders that happened nearby back in the day, there is a scream out in the woods. Everyone argues about what to do. Someone says, “Let’s go call someone on the pay phone!” Some idiot (NOT Tammy or Lynn or I) says, “I’ll go by myself!” When the idiot doesn’t come back, Tammy, Lynn, and I bravely volunteer to go find out what happened to her. We see the phone. It is hanging by its cord. There is no sign of the idiot. Lynn tries to get a dial tone, but the phone is dead. Suddenly, we hear a cacophony of screams from the cabin. That’s when Tammy says, “Hey, I brought the key for the truck!” And we leave. I understand there are some nice spas in Lake George.

More likely someone will get poison ivy or something. But still. We’ll see what I can manage on Monday.

Posted by adrienne at 09:46 PM | Comments (7)

September 18, 2007

My Nine Favorite Kinds of Pie

I always thought Harold was just being a pig in the original Harold and the Purple Crayon until I started thinking about my own nine favorite kinds of pie and realized that nine didn’t manage to cover all the kinds of pie I like.

1. Strawberry (Obviously, it’s the best pie.)
2. Blueberry (Close second.)
3. Cherry
4. Lemon Meringue
5. Raspberry
6. Blackberry
7. Key Lime
8. Pumpkin
9. Peanut Butter

Thanks to Alkelda for starting this train of thought in the comments a few days ago.

Posted by adrienne at 08:24 PM | Comments (12)

September 17, 2007

Maybe I’ve Been Spending Too Much Time Watching Heroes

Remember how I had my allergies retested a few months ago? Well, last week, I began the shots that are eventually supposed to make me more like normal people whose immune systems aren’t always trying to kill them. I don’t know what that is like, but it sounds like a good idea.

One of my worst allergies, it turns out, is to roaches. It’s hard for me to believe that a roach allergy isn’t something that should be considered functional and normal, but my allergist disagrees. One of the shots I’m being given is designed to combat this roach allergy. Put another way, I am currently paying $20 a week to be injected with ground-up roach.

Gross.

This is where I went wrong. When you go to the allergist, they give you a questionnaire to fill out. It’s full of lifestyle stuff, the sorts of things you may or may not do that would have an impact on your allergies and their potential treatment. The questions seem straightforward and innocent enough.

Here is my advice to you: tell those people NOTHING they do not need to know. Otherwise, you, too, might find yourself driving to Brighton and paying $20 a week to be shot up with roach. It was the series of questions about travel that did me in. I confessed to having particular difficulty with my allergies when I travel, and I revealed that past and upcoming trips included major cities like Washington, Boston, New York, and Chicago. When my allergist told me he wanted to treat my roach allergy, I got all, “Why? I don’t need that. There aren’t roaches in my house.” That’s when he got all, “The roach allergy is why you’re having trouble when you travel.” He’s probably right. The roaches are what made my arm swell up when I had my tests done, but still. Yuck, yuck, yuck.

On the bright side, I like to think that in the event of a nuclear attack, the roach goo will bond with my DNA, turning me into Roach Girl: The Only Human Who Can Survive Nuclear Fallout. It could also come in handy if someone tries to poison me. You can never be too careful.

Posted by adrienne at 04:14 PM | Comments (14)

September 12, 2007

Here’s How It Works

My collection currently contains two purple Magic 8 Balls: The Mystical Orb (my newest acquisition, pictured above) and the Sarcastic Magic 8 Ball. If you post your yes-or-no questions in the comments, I will consult both my purple Magic 8 Balls as well as my High School Musical Magic 8 Ball (we need a tie-breaker) and report back on their answers.

I should go first.

Is this a good idea?
The Mystical Orb: “Unlikely” (HEY!)
The Sarcastic Magic 8 Ball: “Oh, Please.”
The High School Musical Magic 8 Ball: “Stick to the Status Quo”

Whatever. We’re doing it anyway.

Posted by adrienne at 09:08 PM | Comments (15)

September 10, 2007

Purple Week, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Dark Chocolate Peanut M&Ms

Here is a true thing: I am not a big fan of candy. I eat it when it’s around, sure, but it’s not something I normally buy or keep around the house. When I do eat candy, though, my favorite candy – the only candy I eat with any kind of zeal – is peanut M&Ms. I don’t know why people eat regular M&Ms, to tell you the truth, and I have no idea why anyone would eat the ones with peanut butter or crunchies and whatever-all they’re putting in M&Ms now. Several years ago, my love of peanut M&Ms took a fateful turn when they started selling dark chocolate peanut M&Ms as a promotional tie-in to Star Wars: Episode III (Revenge of the Lack of Tension of Any Sort Between Natalie Portman and Hayden Christensen). I ate those things by the big one-pound bagful. It was heaven.

Then, about a month after the film’s release, they were gone.

Regular dark chocolate M&Ms have remained available in some markets through the ensuing years, but the peanut variety disappeared entirely. I couldn’t even find them at M&M World in Las Vegas when I visited, and, believe me, I asked (Clerk: “We have the regular dark chocolate ones.” Me: “That's not what I want.” Clerk: “They’re practically the same thing.” Me: “I don’t think so.”).

A few weeks ago, though, I noticed an ad for dark chocolate M&Ms in my Entertainment Weekly that made me think, “Oh, maybe they’re bringing them back!” Then I told myself to stop being silly and concentrate on something else before this cruel world once again dashed my hopes and dreams. Then, yesterday, there they were in the checkout line at Wegman’s:

Naturally, I purchased a bag, took all my groceries to the car, ate the M&Ms (which were EXACTLY as good as I remembered), and then went back in to see if they had them available in a one-pound bag.

They didn’t.

So I went ahead and bought another little pack in the checkout line.

Then I found one-pound bags at Eckerd today: ON SALE, BUY ONE GET ONE FREE!!!

Before this happened, things like Chasing Ray’s kidlitosphere-wide Recommendations from Under the Radar week and 7-Imp’s Picture Book Week and my usual obsession with the color purple had me thinking that maybe, just maybe, I should have an entire week devoted to purple here at watat.com

Did you happen to notice the color of the dark chocolate peanut M&Ms package?

Oh, yeah, baby. It’s a sign.

And so I think that my entry introducing Purple Week is going to be longer than any of the entries I plan to post during Purple Week, but at least we know that, thanks to the fine people who make M&Ms, I should have plenty of energy.

Posted by adrienne at 05:17 PM | Comments (11)

September 09, 2007

Dishes with Flowers

It’s amazing how flowers can brighten up a counter full of dishes waiting to be washed.

Maybe not.

I guess I have some work to do….

Posted by adrienne at 10:43 AM | Comments (1)

September 06, 2007

Quotable Thursday

“After a while, Mr. Lovingood, a middle manager there, said, ‘Mr. Feynman, we’ve been going for two hours now.’”
-Richard Feynman, “An Outsider’s Inside View of the Challenger Inquiry” in Our Future in Space, ed. By Steven Anzovin (c. 1991)

For two supposedly mild-mannered children’s librarians working in a virtual paradise, Jason and I have a large number of… disagreements. Part of this is because we’re both always right (although it should absolutely be noted that I am always righter), and part of it is because WPL is a busy, busy place and we’re kind of stressed out. Anyway, one of the reasons I so enjoy working with Jason (even when I am, for instance, actively considering throwing a chair at his head) is that occasionally I’ll be at the Reference Desk and he will read me some random thing out of an outdated book he just happened to pull off the shelf that – taken, clearly, completely out of context – really, really makes me laugh. The above is an example from yesterday that made me go, “What? No! Youaremakingthatupletmesee!”

Another thing about Jason is that when your car completely dies on your way to work (the second time, in theory, that your car has died THIS WEEK), he will drive over and pick you up and not complain about it or anything, even if he happened to be with you the first time it died and wound up not being able to see The Ten (which you probably wanted to see more than he did anyway, but still). Overall, a good deal.

Posted by adrienne at 02:32 PM | Comments (3)

September 05, 2007

I Don’t Have Kindergarten

First Grade

Second Grade

Third Grade

Holy crap.

Posted by adrienne at 09:21 AM | Comments (8)

September 04, 2007

The Best Thing Ever

One day I was going on about how something was “my favorite,” and one of my friends said to me, “Oh, Adrienne, EVERYTHING’S your favorite.”

That’s kind of true.

What I’ve noticed ever since this friend said that is that I am, truly, always calling things “my favorite” or “awesome” or “cool” or “the best thing about my life” or – and this, perhaps sadly, could be my catchphrase – “the best thing ever.” I know that as a reviewer and critic, I should be probably be more detached and bored and cynical, but instead I’m always going on about things that I love. I love people and my cats and books and movies and music and food. I love living life. More to the point, I love living my life, at least most of the time, and it’s a good thing because I never would have survived this long if I didn’t. This is why I so enjoy initiatives like 7-Imp’s 7 Kicks and Robin’s Friday Lists: they’re excuses to celebrate existing. That I can get into, even if I know I have to work on being more discriminating from time-to-time because I know, for instance, that my new Bartleby t-shirt isn’t the best thing EVER.

It is pretty darned good, though.

Posted by adrienne at 10:07 PM | Comments (8)

September 03, 2007

“What’ll We Do Tonight, Brain?”

“The name of this character is not Witchiepoo, but there are moments when Stardust resembles nothing so much as the world’s most deluxe episode of H.R. Pufnstuf.”
-Owen Gleiberman on Michelle Pfeiffer’s character in Stardust: “Astral Protection” (film review), Entertainment Weekly, August 17, 2007

I take this reference to H.R. Pufnstuf (“Who’s your friend when things get rough?”) in a major mainstream magazine as a sign that Generation X is, at long last, taking over the world. I was kind of worried that our cynicism might get in the way of our making a mark beyond Reality Bites and Clerks, so, you know, whew!

Personally, I am preparing to give up my own slacker ways and go back to work and regular blogging tomorrow. While it’s undeniable that I’ve been slacking on my blogging, I haven’t been slacking on much else for a change. I did all kinds of crazy cleaning and organizing around my house while I was on vacation, and, while it’s still kind of untidy, I feel this odd sense of accomplishment, as opposed to that more typical nagging feeling that I should have done more work and less lolling. September’s going to be busy, though. Here’s a preview:

October is worse. Seriously, who planned all this stuff? Two trips, one presentation, several classes, work, Talk Like a Pirate Day. Sigh. I’m looking forward to it all, but, then again, I think I’m going to spend the rest of today pretending none of it is going to happen. Every once in a while, people ask me how I manage to do so much. Here’s the formula: plan without thinking, concentrate on what you have to do right now, try not to freak out, and drink lots of caffeine. Speaking of which....

Posted by adrienne at 02:56 PM | Comments (8)

August 31, 2007

In Which We Take a Break from Poetry Friday to Do Something Productive with Our Anger

Today is the third anniversary of Brian’s death, and in his memory, I’d like to encourage all of you to do a few things:

1. Friend of watat.com and two-time cancer survivor Shannon Case is busily fighting the good fight over at cyclingforcancer.org. You could buy a t-shirt. Shannon was a friend to Bri when he was alive, he’s been a friend to me since, and he has raised a lot of money to fight cancer. Rock on, Shannon!

2. Speaking of fighting the good fight, Duane, a friend of a friend (well, the boyfriend of a sister of a friend, but you get me), is currently undergoing a stem cell transplant as part of his third (THIRD!) battle against cancer. I’ve been following Duane’s story online for months now, and even though his situation is so stunningly unfair and difficult and stem cell transplant is a frightening procedure, Duane remains positive and strong. Please say a prayer for him or send along some good vibes.

3. While we’re at it, Emily (the friend mentioned in #2) is raising money for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society by participating in a Light the Night Walk. I encourage contributing to the cause.

4. Duane isn’t the only person I know being affected by cancer at this moment. One of our regular patrons at Webster is, after months of chemo, getting ready to undergo surgery in a couple weeks to combat breast cancer. She has two small children at home and is one of those amazing people who always manages to get things done. For instance, even in the midst of all this turmoil in her life, she took the time to buy the library a bunch of glue sticks a few weeks ago (and which we really, really needed). She could use some prayers, too.

5. Last, I am going to do the sentimental thing. Life freaking sucks sometimes. Be good to yourselves; be good to each other. And thank you, all of you, for being here and being so good to me.

Posted by adrienne at 08:29 AM | Comments (9)

August 28, 2007

The View from Suite 305

Sabrina had Olivia's birthday celebration at Frontier Field last night, which meant that all of us got to go hang out and watch the game in a luxury box. How sweet is that? Very. You can watch the games from the seats outside, but then they have a room with a TV so you can watch the game inside while you're getting food or talking with your friends or whatever. It was surreal, but in a cool way. Plus the Red Wings won! Go Wings!

Posted by adrienne at 11:50 PM | Comments (5)

August 27, 2007

...And That's When We Were Attacked by a Mammoth

I'm on vacation. Work with me here.

Posted by adrienne at 02:19 PM | Comments (12)

August 26, 2007

“Why I Live at the P.O.”

Whenever there’s a rate change, the selection of stamps is pathetic for a couple months while the Post Office figures itself out. (That is, of course, unless you’re into stamps in weird denominations, which I totally am. I mean, have you seen the Tiffany Lamp one-cent stamps? They are so pretty, and, at that price, you can use them like stickers. Don’t tell the P.O. I said that, though, or they’ll make the one-cent stamps ugly again, and then where will we be?) The P.O. launched the 41-cent rate with the Star Wars stamps, which are pretty much the coolest thing the Post Office has ever done. They also unveiled the triangular Jamestown stamp, which is novel (and which they don’t even seem to be selling online anymore). Aside from the shape, I really like the colors on that one. The P.O. also wisely premiered the universal stamp with the latest rate change. It’s a genius marketing ploy and undeniably convenient, but what good is a stamp that’s always going to be good if it’s always going to be ugly? I mean, points for symbolism and all, but someone could have made a stab at attractive design.

The Post Office has moved on, though, and so should we:

The Louis Comfort Tiffany Window
Seriously, how pretty are these? I wish this was a series with more designs, but this one design is pretty enough to make up for the lack of variety.

Marvel Comics Super Heroes
One of the reasons I was so sad about the rate change was that I knew it was going to knock out the DC Comics stamps, which were completely fun. The good news is that the Marvel stamps are, I think, even more fun. YES! Why didn’t they make this design universal?

Pacific Lighthouses
For Chuck and Kelly. This set has both variety and a classic design going for it.

Pollination
As a stamp theme, this is weird. Design-wise, though, WOW. That person earned his/her paycheck.

The Art of Disney: Magic
Whatever. They’re cute.

Celebrate
Funky. I haven’t bought a sheet of these yet, but I totally want to.

Beautiful Blooms
One of those all-purpose stamp sets. You can’t go wrong with flowers.

Wedding Hearts
Nothing will ever take the place of Puppy Love in my heart (as it is the best stamp they ever did ever), but these are really pretty – elegant, even.

Vintage Mahogany Speedboats
Um, what? All this has going for it is that it’s completely odd and plain and isn’t going to sell very well, so if you buy some, you’ll be unique.

Posted by adrienne at 10:38 AM | Comments (20)

August 25, 2007

I Had to Rouse Myself to Go to Byrne Dairy for More Cream for My Coffee, So I Figured I Might as Well Blog While I Was Up

“Violence begets violence, yo.”
-Adam in “No Bad Guy,” Joan of Arcadia, Season One

People are always all over me about my newspapers and making fun of me when I say that Vogue is well-written – which, whatever, it is, and, honestly, knowing when Anna Wintour is going to decide to let stores stop selling ridiculous tight high-waisted pants is going to have more of an impact on my daily life than, say, the NFL’s decision to take a stand against animal abuse (which, you know, bravo NFL, but I’m not currently speaking to the NFL since a stinking preseason game knocked out Jericho last night). Anyway, if I weren’t such a devoted reader of my newspapers, then I wouldn’t be able to share this tidbit from EW regarding the upcoming The Golden Compass film with all of you:

“Conspicuously absent, for instance, is any reference to Catholicism; instead, the malevolent organization that snatches children to surgically remove their souls is referred to in the movie only as the Magisterium. ‘It has been watered down a little,’ admits Kidman, who stars as the icily evil Mrs. Coulter. Not that she’s complaining. Quite the contrary. ‘I was raised Catholic,’ she says. ‘The Catholic Church is part of my essence. I wouldn’t be able to do this film if it were at all anti-Catholic.’”
-“Fall Movie Preview,” Entertainment Weekly, August 24, 2007

#1 – The writer used a semicolon. Nice.
#2 – My reactions to this passage were: “I must have read that wrong. Let me read it again…. No, okay, she really said that she wouldn’t have done the film if it were at all anti-Catholic.” This is when I laughed my head off. I called and tried to explain to Tammy why this was so ridiculous, but she hasn’t read the books and couldn’t really appreciate the whole thing. If you haven’t read the series, this is kind of like saying that because the NFL decided to suspend the dogfighter, it is a solidly anti-violence organization.

Ergo, spending my day drinking coffee and reading magazines has been completely worthwhile. As if there were any doubt.

Posted by adrienne at 03:24 PM | Comments (3)

August 19, 2007

“People Talk a Lot But They Don’t Know”

“Well, I’m pretty serious. It’s about time I had some supernatural powers.”
-Kim in “Dead Dogs and Gym Teachers,” Freaks and Geeks, Season One

I can't talk
I gotta go
Don't call me back
I won't get the door
-“Climbing the Walls” on They Might Be Giants' The Else

“Climbing the Walls” is one of those songs that makes me feel like maybe I’m not as odd as I think I am. Of course, TMBG are odd. Tough call.

This is not a tough call: I won’t be blogging again until Wednesday or Thursday. Tammy and I are taking the boys to Amherst for a few days, and I’m not even taking my laptop. It’s a fast trip, and I’m going to have a million other things to concentrate on, such as the Eric Carle Museum and the Emily Dickinson house and that cool toy store and the Black Sheep café. It’s not that I’m saying that I don’t have time for you; I just think that a little space will be healthy for both of us right now. I’ll miss you, though.

Posted by adrienne at 08:05 PM | Comments (3)

August 18, 2007

What to Do with Tomatoes

I love fresh tomatoes, and at this time of year, they become the focal point of my diet. Currently, I am living on tomato sandwiches and extremely low-effort salsa.

Tomato Sandwiches
There are a lot of schools of thought about how a tomato sandwich should be made. My version is correct. Take two slices of some kind of whole grain bread. Some people insist on white bread; I don’t know what is wrong with those people, although I suspect that they also do not habitually keep baking chocolate in their kitchens. Next, put a slice of cheese on one side of the bread. If the cheese is small, you can use two slices, but the cheese is an accessory, not the point of the sandwich. Currently, I am grooving on a Colby jack cheese I’m getting sliced up every few days in the deli, but, you know, whatever. Slice up a tomato and put all the slices on top of the cheese. Some people prefer one layer of tomato, but I really like to have at least two. If the tomatoes are small, I will slice up a second one to achieve the desired effect. Spread a very thin layer of mayonnaise on the second slice of bread and settle it on top. Eat, sometimes twice a day.

Extremely Low-Effort Salsa
Cut up a bunch of stuff into little pieces, throw it in a bowl, and stir. The stuff simply must include tomatoes, some kind of hot pepper, and lots and lots of cilantro. I almost always include garlic, onion, and a little bit of green pepper. Sometimes if I’m feeling the need for protein, I throw in a can of beans, usually black. You can eat this with a spoon or shovel it in with the assistance of a vehicle food such as tortilla chips. If you’re in a meal-making mood, you can cook up a piece of fish and put some of this on top. I guess it would work with chicken, but I’ve never tried it.

And that, my friends, concludes today’s installment of Adrienne’s Obsession with Food. On our next episode: Adrienne’s Summer-Long Quest to Make the Perfect Iced Tea.

Posted by adrienne at 05:42 PM | Comments (7)

August 17, 2007

“And, Yes, You Can Feel Happy:” Poetry Friday

And I do feel happy on my first semi-official day of vacation. I love my job, but no obligation will coerce me to go to the library again until September 4, and I couldn’t be happier. To celebrate, I give you “Miracle Ice Cream” by Adrienne Rich, the woman I was named after. [Jazz hands, everyone! Smile!] I’ve never really understood what this poem is about, although it seems quiet and content and I do truly believe that ice cream is a miracle, particularly in summer when I seem to eat it every other day.

Today has also put me in mind of John Ciardi, but, then again, I’m always thinking of my man John.

[Let us go then, you and I, to check out the roundup over at Kelly Fineman’s LiveJournal. Jazz hands for Kelly, people! Look lively!]

Posted by adrienne at 03:35 PM | Comments (10)

August 15, 2007

The Price of Being Busy and Important

I know I’m in a weird place when I can’t wait for my schedule to die down so that I can get some time to clean the house. I’ve been running around this week thinking things like, “If only I could take time to scrub the sink right now,” or, “If only I had time to sweep.” I have the next two weeks off work. Have I mentioned that I’m really looking forward to it? The kitties and I need quiet time at home.

Posted by adrienne at 10:21 PM | Comments (5)

August 13, 2007

Stargazing

Last night, Tam and I went on a roundabout drive looking for the perfect place to watch the Perseids, finally settling on a street that dead ends on Lake Ontario. Then we spent a couple hours lounging on the hood of Tam’s truck, listening to the waves and critters, talking, marveling that the people in the house near us were watching TV when the sky was RIGHT THERE. We saw some amazing shooting stars. They’re a miracle every time I see one. We kept gasping and exclaiming and pointing.

I remember back in the day when I first read in my great big old National Geographic Picture Atlas of Our Universe (1980 ed.) that shooting stars were really meteors burning up in the earth’s atmosphere. I got irritated because I felt that adults had been deliberately misleading me, letting me believe they were stars. I was grateful to the book, though, so much so that I only recently deleted that particular edition from WPL’s collection. I’d feel worse about waiting so long, except a fair number of other libraries still have the wildly outdated 1980 and 1986 editions in their collections. Many have the 1994 as well, which I daresay has also lived a happy life that needs to end.

Obviously, and in spite of my general scientific and mathematical ignorance, it’s important to me to have a first-rate up-to-date science collection in the library, particularly about stargazing, something I’ve always loved to do. I had a little girl come in to the library last week who told me she was “totally into astronomy right now,” so I got to show off a few of my favorite titles from our collection. Now I share them with you:

Children’s Night Sky Atlas by Robin Scagell
Say what you will about DK, but this book is interesting and engaging and beautiful. It’s a book I wish I had when I was a kid.

The Kids Book of the Night Sky by Ann Love and Jane Drake, illustrated by Heather Collins
Is it just me in love with Kids Can Press? I really like their books. Generally, they’re well-written, interesting, and well-designed. Plus their bindings hold up. I liked this book so much when I first encountered it that I purchased two copies for WPL.

Once Upon a Starry Night: A Book of Constellations by Jacqueline Mitton and Christina Balit
This book from my first love National Geographic tells the mythology behind various constellations, something that also fascinated me when I was small. The cover on this one doesn’t really do it, but if you tell the kids what the book’s about, they’ll take it.

When I Heard the Learn'd Astronomer by Walt Whitman, illustrated by Loren Long
If one is going to bother learning about the heavens, it’s worth taking time to marvel at the wonder of it all. Besides that, I love Whitman and this poem and take every opportunity to subversively introduce children to poets I like.

Posted by adrienne at 10:27 AM | Comments (13)

August 11, 2007

“I Love Forget-Me-Nots, Fluffernutters, Sugar Pops”

Today, for the first time in many, many years, I played with Barbie dolls. Ironically enough, I was playing Barbies with the daughter of a friend who I played Barbies with when we were little girls. It was kind of awesome. Kate, the child I was playing with, is awesome, and I’m sorry to say that Barbie is also kind of awesome. She may promote unrealistic body images and all that, but it’s also really, really fun to dress her up. I did have the same urge I always have to cut Barbie’s hair, but they were Kate’s dolls, so I refrained. When I was Kate’s age (three), though, all I did with Barbie was cut her hair and dismember her and occasionally try to flush her and her pieces down the toilet. I was kinder to Barbie as I got older, but I never got over wanting one of those big Barbie head things where you could cut her hair and then make it grow again. I’m telling you: I’m getting old enough that I’m starting to go soft. It’s the only explanation for me regarding Barbie with anything other than disdain. This would also explain why I bought Kate a Disney Princess activity book for her birthday. With stickers and two little stampers. The kid loved it, of course, and, in my defense, I also bought her blank paper and a box of crayons….

Posted by adrienne at 10:52 PM | Comments (3)

August 10, 2007

“Hanging on to My Simplicity:” Poetry (and Sometimes a Song) Friday

I subscribe to five podcasts. One of them is KEXP’s Song of the Day, which is where I first heard one of my favorite making-me-feel-better-about-life songs, “This Song Will Ruin/Save Your Life” by the Born Ruffians (or, as they seem to put it, “BORN ruffians,” which, much as I enjoy their song, looks ridiculous). You can listen to the song on the band’s MySpace page. I recommend listening to it REALLY LOUD, but you can make an exception if you’re at work. I also recommend listening to KEXP as a general rule. My good friend Jen (who, thanks to the incompetence of the airline industry is NOT visiting me this weekend – BOO AIRLINES!) turned me on to the joys of listening to KEXP on my computer a few years back, and my life is much improved for it. Now if I could only convince the library administration that “casual business attire” should encompass yoga pants….

[Kelly’s on the roundup today over at Big A little a.]

Posted by adrienne at 10:46 AM | Comments (4)

August 08, 2007

“You've Got Your Airplane, I've Got the Plain Air of Here”

There are three ways that I begin to become aware that something’s bothering me that I’m not dealing with:

1. I either stop sleeping or want to sleep all the time.
2. I start throwing stuff out.
3. I ask for time off work, plan vacations, and/or – best – purchase plane tickets.

Lately, I’m averaging maybe 5-6 hours of sleep a night. The other day, I pulverized a few hard drives. At home I’ve been on a get-rid-of-stuff-I-don’t-need rampage, and at work I’ve managed to fill the recycling bin in my office every day this week. Today, when I meant to be reading the newest issue of The Horn Book, I found myself perusing JetBlue.com to find an affordable flight to get me – no offense, loved ones – the hell out of here.

Ugh.

It’s not like there’s anything huge going on. Mostly I think it’s a general malaise brought on in large part from pushing myself a little too hard the last few weeks. But do you see how pushing myself a little too hard is a wonderful way to avoid dealing with other stuff? If nothing else, life has taught me a cornucopia of coping strategies that I can pull out and apply without thinking. I should maybe think a little more before I buy a plane ticket, I suppose, but I want to visit my aunt anyway and having the ticket all settled will help me feel better – as will, I think, watching some episodes of Freaks and Geeks (in which the characters all have completely inadequate coping mechanisms, which makes me feel both superior and vastly relieved to no longer be a teenager – yay catharsis!). I think I'll go do that now.

[Ed. Note re: General Malaise. Above I link to one of my favorite episodes of This American Life, in which Act 2 features a much more entertaining bout of general malaise than I offer you today, so the link is like a consolation prize. Well worth a listen – yay This American Life!]

Posted by adrienne at 10:29 PM | Comments (2)

August 05, 2007

Author Bios

For me, one of the greatest shocks of becoming a Published Author has been learning that those author blurbs you see around are almost always written by the author him or herself. I don’t know how I thought these things got written before I learned the truth of the matter. I guess I thought there would be someone whose job it was to go to the trouble of interviewing/researching the author and then writing those blurbs, which, now that I write it, seems kind of silly. Thankfully, most of the blurbs I’ve had to write for myself have only had to be two or three sentences long. I did my bio for the book this weekend, though, and that had to be a paragraph.

Yuck.

While I obviously enjoy writing about myself, I do not enjoy writing my own bios. It’s unnatural and awkward and makes me feel sort of embarrassed. I am always tempted to write things like, “’Adrienne Furness’ has fifteen letters.” or “Adrienne is a freelance writer who hates writing about herself in the third person.” or “Adrienne is none of your business.” What I ended up writing was a nice, professional, straight-forward bio highlighting my professional work in libraries and with homeschoolers – exactly what I was supposed to do. Still, wouldn’t version two have been more fun? Ah, well.

Posted by adrienne at 08:45 PM | Comments (11)

August 04, 2007

Not Quite 39 Things

Journey Woman turned 39 the other day (huzzah!) and to celebrate she decided to start a meme: 39 Reasons to Be Happy Today. Jules and Eisha tagged me. How could I resist?

1. It is sunny.
2. It is HOT.
3. I have finally learned how to make the perfect iced tea, which I am now happily guzzling by the gallon because it is sunny and HOT.
4. I’ve acquired quite an array of outdated computers here in the house, which I’m finally getting around to getting rid of. This involved smashing a couple of the oldest hard drives with a hammer out in the garage. I could have reformatted them before tossing them, but smashing them was oh-so-fun and satisfying.
5. I went to cycling class, even though I never really want to.
6. I rewarded myself for #5 by getting a crème brulee latte with whole milk (instead of my usual skim), which was perhaps counterproductive but also totally worth it.
7. I got some excessively yummy peaches at the farmer’s market.
8. I only have to work 10 more days before I’m off for TWO WHOLE WEEKS.
9. Tammy made hotel reservations for us so we can take the boys for a couple days in Amherst, MA, where I will once again be visiting the Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art, where there is currently an exhibit featuring art by Leo Lionni, which is cool.
10. Jennifer’s going to be here for a quick visit next weekend, and I’m already looking forward to it.
11. I’m going to copy Eisha and say that it is so exciting to see the list of people planning to go to the Kidlitosphere Conference in Chicago this October growing and growing. I’m way looking forward to that trip.
12. My book revisions were deemed satisfactory.
13. Dude, I wrote a book! This is number 13 because that thought is only cool for about sixty seconds until I start to think about things like proofing and reviews and potential errors and doing presentations and will the darned thing sell anyway. That’s when I usually do something else for a while.
14. Speaking of which, The Else.
15. I got a review copy of the forthcoming Golden Legacy by Leonard Marcus, which I can hardly wait to read.
16. I have a whole pile of exciting books waiting to be read.
17. Plus magazines.
18. Um, 39 things is kind of a lot, isn’t it? I think I’m just going to try to hit 33, since that’s my age. That’s appropriate, right?
19. The sweet Williams in my garden were suffering, so I trimmed them earlier this week and they’re starting to bloom again.
20. My science-experiment tomato plants are starting to produce a tomato.
21. The Personal Affirmation Magic 8 Ball says, “Pure genius!”
22. It also says, “Brilliant idea!”
23. Okay, I’m stretching.
24. My friends.
25. My family. (I should have thought of #24 and #25 earlier.)
26. Ella.
27. Benny.
28. Happiness, as a concept.
29. The US Postal Service.
30. My laptop.
31. Post-it notes.
32. Pens and blank paper.
33. Finishing my blog entry for today – brilliant!

Posted by adrienne at 02:38 PM | Comments (15)

August 01, 2007

Max with Two of His Favorite Things

Like any sensible person, Max prefers real objects to toys. Here, you see him with two of his favorite things at my house: the watering can and his brand-new-Max-sized broom. Prior to my recent purchase of the Max-sized broom, the boy would happily carry around my full-sized one, which was kind of scary. Max also really likes any kind of electronics: cordless phones, cell phones, remotes. This is a way he’s very different from Lucas. Lucas has always had a low frustration threshold and never cared to, say, figure out how to take the back off the remote to see what’s inside, which Tammy tells me Max has already done. What’s more is that when he did this, Max correctly assessed that the broken remote Tammy had given him to play with was substandard because it didn't have anything inside (i.e. batteries) the way the other, functioning remote did. Clever boy. Plus he still smiles whenever he sees me. Also clever.

Posted by adrienne at 10:48 PM | Comments (3)

July 31, 2007

Guess Who Got Her Revision Letter?

Yes, that’s right: me! It’s not bad at all, but my publisher would like to have the revisions by Friday, which is kind of a few days away, so I’m just going to go ahead and work on that right now. I may be able to manage a real entry tomorrow....

Posted by adrienne at 10:48 PM | Comments (1)

July 29, 2007

“These Are a Few of My Favorite Things”

Thanks to Meg Cabot’s blog, I am newly addicted to a blog called Things I’ve Bought that I Love, whose primary writer is Mindy Ephron of The Office. (I should take a moment to note, of course, that I’m a week behind on pretty much all of my favorite blogs at the moment. This past week killed me: I had fun, but not a moment to breathe or read blogs much.) Mindy’s posts are light and funny, but my post in homage to Things I’ve Bought that I Love is going to be more of a love song to one of my favorite possessions:

For a long time, I was using a cheap insert-type thing to steam vegetables. It worked, but it didn’t have much capacity and was the complete opposite of sexy. This past winter, though, I decided to go hog-wild and purchase this wonderful three quart Farberware steamer. I know that it’s not really possible that the vegetables cooked up in my new steamer taste better than the ones cooked up in my old steamer, but in my head they do, and as we reviewed the other day, just because something’s in your head doesn’t mean that it’s not real.

We are at the height of string bean season here in Western NY, and I’m steaming up green beans, wax beans, and – a new favorite – Romano beans to eat on a daily basis. It’s awesome: a little salt, maybe some butter if I’m feeling naughty, and that’s all they need. Last week, I steamed some green beans just a bit, then I sautéed them with butter and garlic, tossed in some pine nuts and salt, and then ate up every last bit of the yummy goodness. I’ve got my steamer; I’ve got fresh beans. Who could ask for anything more?

Posted by adrienne at 01:35 PM | Comments (5)

July 27, 2007

Lucas, with Mohawk and Dæmon

I seem to be lapsing into an every-other-week Poetry Friday thing. It's not intentional: today I got sidetracked when Jason and I made a disastrous attempt to start working on our fall program schedule. Then I had to go to a Red Wings game. At least I managed to get a pic of Lu sporting his new 'do....

Posted by adrienne at 11:00 PM | Comments (3)

July 22, 2007

Harry Potter, Fresh Eggs, and My Relative Level of Maturity

I hadn’t gotten through all the HP books I wanted to reread before the new book was released on Friday. As I came to the realization that I wasn’t going to be able to finish what I’d started, I told myself that I’d just do the mature thing, calmly continue to read my way through the books I hadn’t finished, and get to book seven when I was done with the others.

When I had #7 in my hand, though, I thought, “Screw that.”

Matter o’fact, I let a lot go yesterday. My normal summer Saturday routine is to get up early, get to the farmer’s market by 8:00, cycling class at 9:00, wait for Lucas to do his swimming class (10:10-10:50), take the boy home, and then go about the rest of my day. Yesterday, I managed the farmer’s market, and that’s only because I’m the kind of girl who can’t resist the allure of fresh string beans and, even better, fresh eggs. (If you have never had really fresh eggs, I feel sad for you. One of my other summer Saturday routines is to figure out how I’m going to cook the first few of my deliciously wonderful fresh eggs for lunch. Yesterday, I ate two fried with hot, buttered toast, and I also used two to make my new favorite brownie recipe as my dish to pass at an afternoon barbecue. Serious yum all around.)

Other than that, I mostly read HP#7. I’m halfway through. I’ll probably finish it today, although I also hope to take care of some grown-up stuff: pay the bills, perhaps, do some laundry, clean, swim some laps at the Y. We’ll see how it goes.

Posted by adrienne at 09:17 AM | Comments (11)

July 14, 2007

“Have Mercy, Baby, on a Poor Girl Like Me”

So I forgot to post to watat yesterday for the first time ever.

That was weird.

What makes it even weirder is that it was Poetry Friday, and I had a post in my on-going “Casey at the Bat” series all planned. I just didn’t do it.

It’s not like anything all that earth-shattering was going on yesterday, either, at the library or at home. I slept in a bit, went to work, worked, came home, did my chores, made some chocolate chip pumpkin muffins, read, and went to bed. I usually start to get a Very Wrong feeling if I don’t post to watat by a certain time in the day, but I didn’t have the Very Wrong feeling at all. I could blame Harry Potter, I guess. I’ve been obsessed with rereading the books (from Azkaban on – I’ve read those first two about a bazillion times) ever since I saw the new movie (which, by the by, I thought was nicely done – for a movie), and I’m afraid that Hogwarts is occupying a fair number of my thoughts even when I’m not reading.

I have been led to understand that some people have never even read a Harry Potter book. It’s a sobering thought, like when I realized that some people really do prefer the tangy zip of Miracle Whip. Both things seem beyond all reason to me.

Anyhoo, I do plan to continue reading at a frantic pace, but I do not plan on forgetting any more posts, which means that I also do not plan to write any more posts about forgetting to post. Maybe I’ll even post about something interesting, like the rockin’ new version of Jane Eyre I started watching today or the fact that I was recently sent an advertisement for an adult “quiet living” facility or how much trying to learn how to play the guitar is hurting my delicate fingers. We’ll see what tomorrow brings.

Posted by adrienne at 07:15 PM | Comments (15)

July 11, 2007

The Joy of Laundry

Of all household tasks, laundry is my favorite. There is something very satisfying about throwing a load of wash in the machine and then sitting around somewhere reading a book knowing that even though you aren’t twitching a muscle, work is still getting done. Clean laundry means more clothes for me to pick from in the morning, which is pretty much the only reason I get up when Lucas isn’t here in the mornings during the summer. As someone with severe allergies, keeping up with the laundry is also one of the easiest and best ways to control allergens in my home, and, as a bonus, the cats and I love to play the laundry-folding game. Fun all around.

Part of my laundry routine is high-tech. I’ve been using a front-loading washing machine for about eight years now (do NOT get me started on The Evils of Your Top-Loading Washing Machine, as I see no reason on this particular subject), which means HE detergents, which are still kind of exotic in my part of the world. Other than that, though, I’m an old-fashioned girl, and two of my favorite laundry products are Biz Stain-Activated Booster and Fels-Naptha soap.

Most people can identify Biz in a lineup, but most people don’t buy it, which is sad as it is the stuff on miracles. If you have something that is especially dingy or that has something on it that you are afraid will stain, this is what you do:

1. Put a shake of Biz in a bucket. (Biz is a powder, btw. They make a liquid product, but yuck.)
2. Fill the bucket with hot/warm water.
3. Drop in dirty items.
4. Go do something else for a while.
5. Take items out of water and launder as per usual.

This always works, and Biz doesn’t give me hives – BONUS!

Equally brilliant is Fels-Naptha, laundry soap that comes in a bar. You use it to wash out stains in much the same way you’d apply soap to a washcloth. It’s awesome for when you spill something on yourself at home that you can take off and treat right away. A little water and scrubbing will take out most stains, and then you can just set the item aside to dry until you’re ready to do a whole load of laundry. It just doesn’t get easier than that.

Maybe, if you’re lucky, one of these days I’ll tell you all about my favorite way to clean windows. Until then, happy laundry.

Posted by adrienne at 09:05 AM | Comments (5)

July 08, 2007

Dead Animal Zoo

Sierra introduces us to Kendall's newest attraction:

"That's all! Goodbye, now. Weirdo."

Posted by adrienne at 12:28 AM | Comments (5)

July 07, 2007

The Monster at the End of My Dining Room Table

"Oh, wait, I forgot to show the pictures."

Ella's reaction:

Posted by adrienne at 01:20 PM | Comments (7)

July 03, 2007

Signs

I have eaten most of a pan of brownies in the last 24 hours, and I am only content when I am blasting CDs and reading Entertainment Weekly. (At work, I am forced to substitute my iPod and Kirkus, which is okay but not quite the same.) I know what this is about, and we’d all be better off if I could just continue peacefully damaging my hearing while reading ephemera for a couple days, but no. Happily, I have the world’s fastest and easiest brownie recipe, and I don’t care what the medical establishment has to say about it – the chocolate helps me feel better.

I originally found the recipe for Katherine Hepburn’s Brownies in More Home Cooking by Laurie Colwin. If you haven’t read this book, I highly recommend that you make it a priority, although I note that the brownie recipe is right there on epicurious. In How to Cook Everything, Mark Bittman says, “Americans must have been sadly alienated from the kitchen for pancake mixes to ever have gained a foothold in the market, for these are ridiculously easy to make.” I think of this whenever I make brownies. Katherine Hepburn’s recipe takes approximately three minutes to mix and uses ingredients that are already in most kitchens. (Well, some people don’t keep baking chocolate in their kitchens, but I’m not sure what’s wrong with them. I fear that they suffer from self-hatred.) I dare you to find a boxed mix that takes less time, and these brownies are GOOD, as in I-think-I’ll-just-go-ahead-and-hide-these-so-no-one-takes-any good. Yum, yum, yummity, yum. I might just make some more. People eat brownies on the 4th of July, right?

Posted by adrienne at 12:10 AM | Comments (13)

July 01, 2007

Recurring Nightmares

“I just find it amusing that you came from somewhere.”
-Marcella in Grosse Pointe Blank

When I made the decision to graduate high school a year early, my chemistry teacher became fond of telling the entire class how I was going to live to regret not sticking around to take physics. Little did he know that I had no intention of taking physics had I stayed, and all I have retained from my year in chemistry is a recurring nightmare in which I am forced to go back to high school to take physics. I enjoyed high school while I was there, but, as I told one of my fellow alumni at our fifteen year reunion last night, that’s only because I had no idea that there were alternatives. Now, when I have my physics nightmare, I wake up in a panic and have to tell myself over and over that it wasn’t real.

The reunion was fun, though.

I’m still close to a couple people from the class of ’92, but I haven’t seen most of them since I graduated in ’91. We had very small classes, but, seriously, I didn’t even recognize some people. One of my classmates told me that she had studied the yearbook before she came to the mixer Friday night, which was brilliant. I’m a librarian; I should have thought of that. The weekend’s events turned out to be a great way to get some time with Terri, who I hardly ever get to see. Back in the day, we lived up the street from each other, we had our lockers right next to each other, and I spent most of the summer at her house every year. She’s one of those friends who I don’t get to talk to a lot, but we invariably always have a lot to say when we do. At the mixer on Friday night, we had a very Terri-and-Adrienne moment where we were standing off to the side kind of watching the various groups of people talking:

Me: We should probably mingle.
Terri: Yeah, we should.
Me: Yeah.
Terri: … [Staring at drink]
Me: … [Swirling around ice in drink]
[Both laughing]

We did finally decide to mingle. It was weird to talk to people who I haven’t seen in years who know things about me, like one of my classmates who was teasing me about how I used to love to have my picture taken (which is true but also very much NOT the case now). I was talking to another classmate about how crazy it was that Brian and I just decided to go out and get married when we were nineteen, and she was like, “Well, that’s how you make all your decisions, right? You’re impulsive” (which is still true). I had a few weird widow moments, which I expected. My favorite was one of my classmates who acknowledged Brian’s death and then said, “Well, you look beautiful!” People always worry about saying the wrong thing in these situations, so I feel that it is my duty to tell you that this is one of the right things to say.

For a small community, Kendall has managed to produce an odd number of people who have gone on to be extraordinarily interesting adults. One of my classmates is, for instance, a toy designer and another told us about his experience dropping bombs from a B-52 in Afghanistan (an activity I don’t particularly support, but it was definitely an interesting conversation). People asked me questions about my book. Being a naturally opportunistic self-promoter, I was like, “Oh, it’s not a novel or anything, just a book about homeschooling.” Then I’d make a face, but, no, they still acted interested. I got to talking to Gunnur, who is a teacher in Iceland, and she told me that homeschooling is illegal there, which I didn’t know. (It’s surprising to me how many countries don’t allow homeschooling.) People are always surprised at how many people from school I’ve stayed close to and how many I see on an at least semi-regular basis, but I don’t understand how one could know people like this and give them up entirely. I have never regretted leaving high school early, but seeing my former classmates again was surprisingly fun, probably because there were no science labs involved. Come to think of it, that probably would have improved my high school experience as a whole....

Posted by adrienne at 11:35 AM | Comments (6)

June 29, 2007

"The Tale of Mr. Morton:" Poetry (and Sometimes a Song) Friday

This weekend is my second fifteen year high school reunion. In celebration, I thought I'd share one of my favorite bits of childhood nostalgia. Schoolhouse Rock still rocks, and, as far as I'm concerned, Mr. Morton rocks the hardest.

This may be why watat.com is a G-Rated Blog. Today's Poetry Friday roundup, consisting mostly of blogs that rate at least an "R," no doubt, is at Shaken & Stirred.

Posted by adrienne at 06:20 PM | Comments (1)

June 25, 2007

In Honor of Chuck's Birthday

Chuck's family gave me a copy of this photo, and, obviously, I had to post it. Chuck is on the right; my late husband is on the left. Brian talked about things he'd done at Chuck's house when they were kids, but he certainly never mentioned this. And look at them! They're so pretty!

Happy Birthday Chuck! What age are we supposed to pretend you are again?

Posted by adrienne at 01:13 PM | Comments (8)

June 24, 2007

“Things Fall Apart”

This past week, we had some pretty serious thunderstorms here in WNY, and on Tuesday, I got a fair amount of water in the laundry room. It came in through a door that leads to a sunken stairwell that takes one into the backyard. Five years ago, if I had walked into the laundry room to find an expanding pool of water, I would have freaked out and let Brian handle it. On Tuesday, though, I looked at it, realized that the drain at the bottom of the stairwell must be clogged, went about unclogging it, and started mopping. It was kind of a pain in the butt, but I didn’t even swear. Even better, today I asked Tam to come over to spot me so I could clean out the gutter above the stairwell because it was also clogged (which had, needless to say, added to the problem), and I spent some more time checking out the rest of the lower gutters. It look a lot of nerve for me to spend that much time on a ladder, so I didn’t go the extra mile and check the gutters on the upper roof, but I think I might try it next weekend. Sometimes I'm not sure that I am the sort of person who should be trusted with a house, but this whole episode made me feel hope for myself as a homeowner. Lately, I’m just full of hope – hope that my life is going to keep getting better and hope that I might be able to do more than I think I can. Brian’s death sapped the hope from my life for what seemed like such a long time, but his absence is a large part of what’s forced me to find hope again. It’s hard to wrap my mind around this happiness, but I’m grateful for it. I’ve decided I’d like it to stay.

Posted by adrienne at 07:43 PM | Comments (10)

June 23, 2007

As Good as It Gets

It is summer.

Tracy’s been staying with me. She and Christina baked brownies last night, and there are still some left in the kitchen. Jen’s in town, so she and I spent most of the day together talking and doing things like drinking coffee at the Leaf and Bean, shopping at Parkleigh, and having lunch with some of her law school friends at the Old Toad. Now I’m waiting for Tammy to pick me up so we can drive out to meet Chuck, Kelly, and company for food and margaritas at the cottage. Life could be better than this, I suppose, but I’m not sure how.

Hope you’re all having equally wonderful weekends.

Posted by adrienne at 05:28 PM | Comments (1)

June 19, 2007

But Whatever Happened to Your Sidebar?

For those of you who haven't noticed, my sidebar has migrated south for the week. You can find it if you scroll way, way, way down. Something about the entry with footnotes did it, and I can't seem to undo it -- just a little more evidence that I have enough techie knowledge to create a mess but not necessarily to do anything constructive. Alas! I'm hoping that once the offending entry is off the main page, my sidebar will pop back up to its former happy home. If not, I don't know. I'll have to think hard, and that would take time away from my books and crossword puzzles.

No, sir, I don't like it.

Posted by adrienne at 08:13 AM | Comments (0)

June 17, 2007

Random Photos, or Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Kitten

This is what you can do to Benny when he's too tired to pay much attention:

This is the front of my office door:

I don't know if Craig's keeping up with the blog these days, but he sent me the Sword in the Stone and Bambi postcards *years* ago, and he may not realize I have saved them all this time.

This is the dress I wore to my high school prom (discussed in the comments earlier this week), hanging where everyone keeps their prom dress, on the back of their office door along with their bathrobes that are currently out of favor:

Ah, Sunday. And now I'm off to a baseball game with my dad....

Posted by adrienne at 12:20 PM | Comments (6)

June 13, 2007

“I May Be Neglecting the Things I Should Do”

For the last three years, I’ve only had a DVD player and a VCR hooked up to my television. I couldn't even get the local networks at home. If I wanted to watch something that was being broadcast on television (i.e. The Office), I would go to the Y and ride the exercise bike while the show was on. Of course, I could only do this with certain shows, as the Y only has six or seven TVs (one of which is always tuned to FOX News – BLECH).

I went totally off the deep end the other day, though, and got a DVR.

I’m not one of those people who is all snobby about not watching television. I like TV. I only got rid of my DVR after Brian died because I was afraid that I would mope around watching television instead of dealing with my life, which, in retrospect, was a good decision. It’s interesting what one misses, though, when one doesn’t watch TV – new shows, for instance, and good commercials. (It irritates Tammy to no end that I never know what she’s talking about when she brings up commercials. Personally, I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s the one who said whatever spurred Lucas into telling me that I should start watching television like a normal person, but I have no proof.)

I have mixed feelings about having TV again. First of all, I hardly know what to do going straight from no stations to having approximately four hundred billion of them. It’s a big step. I mean, I haven't quite been able to wrap my mind around what stations I have access to. That on-screen “guide” is no help at all. With Tammy’s assistance (she knows more about cable than the people at Time Warner), I was able to locate key stations so that I could start recording important programs – Comedy Central (The Daily Report, The Colbert Report), Cartoon Network (Robot Chicken), and NBC (The Office, 30 Rock). That was all I could handle before I had to take a break to read a book. I haven’t actually watched anything yet. Maybe tonight. One day at a time.

Posted by adrienne at 12:28 AM | Comments (11)

June 12, 2007

7-Imp Interview

I have been all a’flutter since Jules and Eisha asked if I would be interested in being part of their interview series at Seven Impossible Things Before Breakfast. And look: there it is! Among other things, you can learn about my favorite word, more about my online activities than I thought anyone besides myself knew (Those crafty girls even link to my all-time favorite watat.com entry!), and more about what Tammy and Jeffrey were up to when they were in the sixth grade. Good times. And I am still all a’flutter.

Posted by adrienne at 07:00 AM | Comments (12)

June 11, 2007

LATE 48 Hour Book Challenge Tallies

My tallies are pathetic:

3 books read
775 pages
8 hours reading
1/2 hour blogging

1 book written (That's something. Not applicable, but something.)

Posted by adrienne at 06:02 PM | Comments (0)

June 08, 2007

Inauspicious Beginning...

I was first tested for allergies in my early 20s, which is when I learned how very many things I was allergic to. I (unwisely) did not keep up with my allergist or take his recommendation to start getting shots, though, and last year my allergies suddenly took a turn for the worse. I kept hoping that things would resolve themselves, but they haven't, so now I am forging a relationship with a new allergist.

I had my first appointment this morning, which started with a retest of my allergies. It turns out that my allergies have gotten much more focused. I'm not allergic to as many things, but the things I am allergic too -- woo boy. Dust is the biggest winner, although feathers and roaches are close seconds. (Why do they test people for roach allergies? I mean, HELLO, I pretty much avoid roaches as a matter of course and assume other people do, too.) Anyway, the whole thing was very informative and the allergist and I have big plans to get me all fixed up and it all seemed to be going along swimmingly.

That is until not long after I wrote my last entry, which is when my upper arm had a delayed and very strong reaction to the skin tests I had this morning. Now my arm is all swollen and red and aching. I guess this isn't such an unusual reaction, although I note that no one mentioned it as a possibility when I was actually getting the tests done. When I talked to the doctor this evening, she said that I should put hydrocortisone cream on it and take some Benadryl, which I did but which has also left me dozing off even in the midst of trying to read a very good book. (The doctor also recommended cold compresses, which I haven't tried yet, mostly because I hate cold things on my skin.)

Sigh.

It is irritating when my body gets in the way of things I want to do. I am going to go try to read again....

Posted by adrienne at 09:05 PM | Comments (3)

48 Hour Book Challenge

Mother Reader's 48 Hour Book Challenge starts today. I'm also still finishing work on the homeschooling book. (I know, I know. I keep saying I'm going to finish it and then taking it back. I swear, I'm turning it in on Monday.) This means two things:

#1 - I'm skipping another week of Poetry Friday in favor of more time reading/writing, and
#2 - I'm officially starting The Challenge now -- 4:31 p.m.

I'll be blogging my progress throughout the weekend. Happy reading, everyone!

Posted by adrienne at 04:33 PM | Comments (0)

June 07, 2007

Joy!

Look at what arrived in my office yesterday:

Yes, it's true: a High School Musical Magic 8 Ball from an anonymous donor. It came in this box with this note:

This person not only solved my dilemma over the High School Musical Magic 8 Ball, but she also wrote her note with a purple Flair -- MY FAVORITE. Plus, check out the ladybug on the box.

Here is the High School Musical Magic 8 Ball getting to know all my other Magic 8 Balls:

Look at how happy everyone is! (Well, aside from the Series of Unfortunate Events Magic 8 Ball, which said, "My sources say tragedy." Spongebob said, "Ask again in jellyfish season," which is so very typically random.)

I think I know who sent this treasure. The problem with guessing, though, is that it's so embarrassing if one gets it wrong. Let's consult the High School Musical Magic 8 Ball:

Question: Did the person who I think sent you really send you?
HSM: Call back Friday @ 3:30.
Question: Why 3:30?
HSM: Not another word.
Question: What?
HSM: Your head's in the game.
Question: ...
HSM: It is so not.

It is all clear to me now. (Plus I think I recognize the handwriting on the note. I have an uncanny knack for that.)

Posted by adrienne at 12:35 AM | Comments (7)

June 04, 2007

What Adrienne Has Been Doing Instead of Writing

I don’t want to get all braggy, but I was having fun.

First, here are just some of the books I picked up at BookExpo:

We shipped from the trade show floor on Friday, so I have another box of them a’coming.

I was most excited to get The Plain Janes, which my new best friend at DC Comics gave me when I explained to him how much I’ve been looking forward to reading it. Those folks at DC have been very kind to us at WPL. I was so excited when I got an ARC of Meg Cabot’s forthcoming Jinx that I was jumping up and down. I was also really happy to meet Rose Kent (author of Kimchi & Calamari), and Jason was very kind and got me a signed copy of the ARC of What they Found: Love on 145th Street by Mr. Walter Dean Myers. It was even kinder the way Jason carried my books around along with his most of the time, which saved me a great deal of pain and suffering.

In the box en route is my signed copy of An Abundance of Katherines by John Green, who seemed genuinely surprised when I said that I was a fan of Brotherhood 2.0. I mean, isn’t EVERYONE? Of course, the nanosecond after I got my book signed, I called Tammy and left a message in which I may have sounded a bit like a fangirl.

When we weren’t having fun obtaining mass quantities of books, we did a lot of other stuff. Mostly we ate. We also saw Spring Awakening, which was AWESOME. I might blog about it in more detail later this week, but, in the meantime, I want to highly recommend that all of you run out and watch it.

I will close with a picture of Jason and I and a very rare NYC tree that can make force lightning:

Now *that's* cool.

Posted by adrienne at 06:24 PM | Comments (8)

May 30, 2007

Eight Things Meme

YES! Wendy from Blog from the Windowsill tagged me!!! Here’s the deal:

Each player lists 8 facts/habits about themselves. The rules of the game are posted at the beginning before those facts/habits are listed. At the end of the post, the player then tags 8 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

Could there possibly be eight things about me that I haven’t already written on repeatedly and at length? Let us see.

1. As many of you know, I collect Magic 8 Balls, but, as no one would know because I haven’t been talking about it, I have been grappling with an ethical dilemma concerning my collection. Disney has allowed the creation of a High School Musical Magic 8 Ball. I dislike spending money on Disney products + I love Magic 8 Balls = I have devoted an absurd amount of thought to this contradiction. I haven’t yet allowed myself to buy the Magic 8 Ball in question, although I fear I could cave at any moment. (OMG! Check this out. I didn't even know that one existed!!!)
2. Even though I keep saying I’m not going to write another book, I totally have an idea for one. I wrote up some notes about it last week.
3. I love the catalpa tree in my yard better than all the other trees because it’s so odd.
4. Flairs are my writing implement of preference.
5. Lucas brought a cookie to my house yesterday (as he often does) and only ate half of it (as he often does) so I ate the remaining half last night (as I often do), but this time he remembered that he’d left the other half of the cookie (as he NEVER does) so I had to admit my sneaky ways.
6. I will happily listen to loud music but, aside from that, I am very skittish about any kind of loud noise, which is one of the many reasons I have so steadfastly avoided using power tools.
7. When I was a preschooler, I had an invisible friend named Max.
8. I have been experimentally not using the microwave at work and at home for the last couple months to see how I like life without one, and now I’m seriously considering giving mine the boot. I could use the counter space.

Now I'm supposed to tag eight people. That's a lot, and a lot of people have already been doing it. Here goes:
1. Jeffrey at Demanding Robot
2. Sarah at Confessions from a Life on Holiday
3. Stephanie over at Another Kick Butt Librarian
4. Sophie at It's a Dog's Life

Wow, it's like everyone else has already been tagged. If I missed you, and you need a tag, please take it. :)

Posted by adrienne at 10:32 AM | Comments (12)

May 29, 2007

Lucas, Mucas, Pukas

As some of you already know, I'm off to BookExpo America in NYC this weekend.

[Momentary pause while Adrienne does dance of joy.]

Lucas is the sort of kid who usually goes with the flow, but he prefers when he has some idea of what to expect. So I was talking to him this morning about how I was going to be in NYC this weekend ("You mean where the Statue of Liberty is? And the Empire State Building???"). I told him about some of the things I'd be doing, including seeing the show Heather's working on. I asked him if he remembered Heather and he was like, "YES!" Then he rolled his eyes like a teenager.

Then he said, "Adrienne, you need to think about Heather's name."

Me: "Um, okay."
Lucas: "If you replace the 'H' with a 'W,' what do you get?"
Me: "Oh, Weather!"
[Giggling.]
Lucas: "Let's think of another one...."
Me: "'L' -- Leather!"
Lucas: "F!"
Me: "Feather!"
[More giggling.]

We couldn't think of any more. I swear, though, this is a sign that Lucas is going to develop the ability to anagram in his head. I completely envy people who can anagram in their heads (Olivia), which just goes to show that I am a nerd exactly the way the survey said I am.

I guess we already knew that, though. At least I'm in good company.

Posted by adrienne at 04:23 PM | Comments (6)

May 28, 2007

Was Anyone Watching the Game or Were We All Too Busy Eating Fried Dough?

And, hey, look, the Red Wings were playing Jen's new home's team. And we won! Good day....

(Please note Lucas's lack of front teeth.)

Posted by adrienne at 09:19 AM | Comments (2)

May 26, 2007

“If You Wake Up and Don’t Want to Smile”

My essential dislike of anything that resembles labor is something of a theme in this blog. What I dislike isn’t really work – I rather enjoy, for instance, doing laundry and cleaning the bathroom and tidying things up – but is something more precisely rooted in quantity and pace. I love to lollygag and rail against too much structured time.

I kind of thought the book was taking over my life months ago, but I knew nothing then. I realized a few weeks ago that thinking “Gosh, I really ought to read that 800 page book” wasn’t getting the 800 page book read. It’s the essential problem of creating anything. I have these ideas in my brain, and making those ideas into real things someone could kick around is a real pain in the ass. When I sit down to write something, I have words in my head, but not all of them – a lot of what I have is a sense or a feeling. This is why first drafts can be such a disaster. One tries to capture the intangible with slightly inadequate and shifty symbols. I imagine it’s much the same thing when one is trying to paint a picture or sculpt something or take a photo, but I’m too busy not doing much to know that from personal experience. Research is even worse because I know I want such-and-such a fact, but facts can be very elusive.

So, anyway, the last few weeks I’ve been forcing myself to do only essential things and work on the book, skipping, for instance, eating anything decent, getting adequate sleep, or, even, exercising. I’ve done some incredible work on the book, but the abrupt lifestyle change has taken its toll. Today, I decided to give myself a break. I went to cycling class at the Y this morning. Yes, it’s true. It felt like recreation, like I was maybe even being a little naughty. I followed this up with eating a leisurely breakfast with Tammy and Max and then doing a little laundry. I felt so reenergized that I read a whole book that allowed me to write a two sentence annotation for my homeschooling core collection. Brilliant! Tonight, I’m going to a baseball game. Am I planning to eat a piece of the 1000-calorie fried dough at least two people a day visit watat.com to learn more about? You bet I am! Screw it all!

I am also going to bring the manuscript (which now weighs a whole pound!) with me. I still have some work to do.

Posted by adrienne at 03:20 PM | Comments (4)

May 25, 2007

“Yes I’ll Obsess on Splitting that Infinitive:” Poetry Friday

and right, I know I talk too much and think
too much about what I’m thinking and not
enough about what I say, and simmer too long

in the crock of myself, which is right where I
get when I get this way and want to say
shut up, Simmerman, just shut up . . . .
-from “Jittery” by Jim Simmerman

I don’t know Simmerman's other work, but I love this poem. It’s the story of my life always, but particularly lately. It’s hard to do stream-of-consciousness, but I think Simmerman manages it convincingly here. He’s telling a story but also getting into that frame of mind where one is nervous and the caffeine isn't helping. He succeeds by using small words and minimal full stops. Even though the poem is long on the page, it consists of only five delightfully punctuated sentences (colons! semicolons! yes!). He relies on lots of variations of “to be,” which is hard to make interesting, but look at how the “is” hangs in the air when you don’t quite know where he’s going in the line/stanza break in “what you get when you get too much of what it is/they’ve got to give you.” Beautiful. It’s one of the details that helps capture the experience. Even he doesn’t quite know where he’s going. It is the combined beauty and difficulty of interacting with other humans when one is shy and introspective and slightly hopped up on caffeine.

And now, my friends, it’s time for me to get another latte. Happy weekend!

[Today’s roundup is over at A Wrung Sponge.]

Posted by adrienne at 09:34 AM | Comments (0)

May 24, 2007

The Flip Side

Left side: "Peep set."
Right side: "Darth Peep."

Posted by adrienne at 07:02 AM | Comments (2)

May 23, 2007

I Think I'll Just Let Lucas Take Care of My Blog This Week

(Click on picture to see larger image, which is so totally worth it.)

Posted by adrienne at 12:02 AM | Comments (1)

May 22, 2007

Lucas, A Monologue

"Where's the woodchuck today? The woodchucks in my yard have both chased me because they want to bite me. They aren't scared of me and they get on the ramp on my playset to try to bite me when I'm on it. They're scared of me now, for some reason. I am NOT looking at that dead possum today. [Makes yuck noise.] I don't want to see it. It makes me want to throw up when I look at it. I don't like dead possums because they have a lot of blood, and I NEVER want to see a dead lizard because they REALLY have a lot of blood. I know that. Sometimes they shoot blood out of their eyes. I can shoot blood out of my eyes, but most of the time I just don't. I got a cut yesterday and when I went in the house it was bleeding and I had to get a band-aid. Want to see?"

Posted by adrienne at 09:16 AM | Comments (5)

May 21, 2007

Homeschooling and Society

“If you are going to keep your children out of schools you had better decide what an education means because no one is going to do it for you.”
-David Guterson in Family Matters: Why Homeschooling Makes Sense

When I talk to people who are seriously opposed to homeschooling, the conversation almost always leads me to realize that the person I’m talking to believes that the negative experiences that are part of most people’s school years are essential to surviving life in the adult world. This belief doesn't make a lot of sense to me, although I can see where it comes from. People who suffered in school want to believe that it was to some good end. People who are miserable as adults believe – somewhat ironically – that teaching children that they shouldn’t hope for good things in life will be better for them in the long run. People, as a species, sometimes have trouble imaging alternatives.

When the United States became a country, home education was the norm, and when leaders started talking more seriously about compulsory education in 1800’s, people generally hated the idea. It’s remarkable how quickly Americans turned to state-controlled education, though, when industrialization began having a strong impact on people’s daily lives – speeding up the pace of life and keeping parents more often away from home. People didn’t feel up to the task of educating their children, and, not unlike parents today, they worried that their children would be left behind in a time of dramatic changes. Still, it is remarkable to me that the idea of institutionalized schools took such a strong hold so quickly that just over one hundred years later homeschooling sounds like such a radical idea to so many people.

For me, the whole thing becomes a question of what, exactly, we as a society want for our children. Reading David Guterson’s Family Matters: Why Homeschooling Makes Sense the other day, I was reminded that the end of education for so many people is about attempting to find wealth. This is something I’m kind of divorced from in my life in the non-profit sector. At 33, I can see myself happily laboring as a Librarian II for the rest of what promises to be a long career. I will never make a ton of money, but there are so many things that are more important to me – security, freedom, fulfillment, time off. I think I take it for granted that everyone can find a job that, like mine, is an excellent match for their personalities and interests. I operate under the assumption that this is the goal of raising children – not that they become wealthy but, rather, that they grow into healthy and happy adults. It’s weird to me to think that anyone could want anything else out of life, but, of course, I don’t know where we’d be if everyone was, like me, vastly more inclined to sit around drinking lattes and reading than, say, doing advanced math. People’s hostility toward homeschooling comes more from the belief that life, and by extension childhood, is and should be full of misery. Perhaps this is the real problem with our schools, with so much of life in general. Homeschooling is not the answer for everyone, but homeschoolers have had a lot of success raising relatively happy, accomplished, and well-adjusted adults. I think people should stop picking on them.

Posted by adrienne at 08:28 AM | Comments (7)

May 20, 2007

True Facts About the Current State of the Homeschooling Book

#1 - Tammy printed out most of what I consider done with the book (although I have since added a few things to what I had previously considered done and have finished yet another chapter), and if you were to bind the finished manuscript pages together and throw them at someone, I believe it would inflict pain. This seems to me a good sign.

#2 - Likewise, if you stand on a chair and drop the manuscript on a wood floor, it makes a very satisfying thump. (Serious bonus points to anyone who gets my reference, although I expect no one will. Sigh.)

#3 - I still haven't successfully committed my book's title to memory, so when people ask me about it, I get all, "Ummmm... it's like Libraries and Homeschoolers or Serving Homeschoolers in Libraries or I don't know. It's got the word 'homeschooling' and the word 'library,' I think." It's kind of embarrassing, yet every time I ask my brain to retain this bit of information, it slips away again.

#4 - I've been doing very little that isn't directly related to writing my book this past week, although I did go to Sierra and Paige's dance recital in the good old Kendall High School auditorium last night. I would like to report further on the recital as it was even more awesome than in past years, which is hard to believe since this event is, normally, quite awesome. (HINT: Ron sang loudly in public. HINT: Lynn danced ON STAGE. HINT: Paige screamed, "NO!" very loudly in public ON STAGE.)

Now I must go read more stuff about homeschooling because, goodness knows, I just haven't read enough.

Posted by adrienne at 03:02 PM | Comments (7)

May 19, 2007

Books in the Pile I Intend to Read When I Am Done Writing the Homeschooling Book

Cold Comfort Farm by Stella Gibbons (reread, on account of the fun newish cover)
The Boyfriend List by E. Lockhart
Boy Proof by Cecil Castellucci
Lucy Rose: Working Myself to Pieces & Bits by Katy Kelly (ARC)
Cassandra's Sister: Growing Up Jane Austen by Veronica Bennett (ARC)
Kiki Strike: The Empress's Tomb by Kirsten Miller (ARC)
Holidays on Ice by David Sedaris (reread, just because)
Swollen by Melissa Lion
World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie War by Max Brooks
Looking for Alaska by John Green
Avalon High by Meg Cabot
Split Screen by Brent Hartinger

Just looking at that shiny, shiny pile of books makes me want to keep writing. I *will* finish my work, I *will* finish my work....

Posted by adrienne at 02:38 PM | Comments (3)

May 17, 2007

My Life is Very Exciting at the Moment...

...and I've been trying to write something cohesive about why and can't quite manage it. The biggest thing today was that I introduced the Children's Department's semi-radical plan for the summer at our full staff meeting this morning, and people were really cool and supportive about it. They asked good questions, and they seemed to be thinking it over. They nodded and smiled. They said nice things. It was so encouraging because we're making a big change, and I've been worried right along about how people would react. You know when things work out nicely, the way you hope they will? That was today. I am a happy librarian right now.

Posted by adrienne at 11:19 PM | Comments (3)

May 14, 2007

Define "Outrageous"

So Lucas and I were on our approach to school this morning when I started to wonder what was so stinky. That's when I noticed the little yellow flags all around the school lawn warning us not to let children walk on it for a couple days.

*sputters* *blinks rapidly* *sputters again*

It's not rare for me to think to myself as I drop Lucas off at school that he'd be better off staying home with me or even spending his day at the library, but it really hits a new level when I have to tell him to stay off the grass on account of his school decided it was a good idea to spread dangerous chemicals all over it.

This happens every year, of course, but it never fails to stun me that my tax dollars support the school district paying someone to bring known carcinogens into the place one of the most precious people in my life is forced to spend his entire day. I mean, I'm the one who brings him there.

*sputters again*

Ugh.

Posted by adrienne at 09:15 AM | Comments (17)

May 13, 2007

"Let Me Drive the Escort!"

Yeah, so, it turns out that problem with poop on my car? Not a robin.

You know, I have a book to finish. I can't keep washing my car every three days. I did the only thing I could do. I let the pigeon drive the Escort:

Posted by adrienne at 10:41 AM | Comments (8)

May 08, 2007

Lucas the Comedian

Lucas: I know a joke!
Me: Hit me.
Lucas: What's the scariest animal in Australia?
Me: A dingo?
Lucas: NO! A kangaBOO.
Me: [laughing] That one's actually good!
Lucas: [rolls eyes, then brightens] Wait! I know another one! What's the stinkiest animal in Australia?
Me: What?
Lucas: A kangaPOO. I know another one: what do you call a kangaroo that likes to dance?
Me: What?
Lucas: A kangaTUTU. Let me think of another one. Hmmmmm.... Got it! What do you call a baby kangaroo?
Me: A joey?
Lucas: That's not a joke.
Me: Oh.
Lucas: A kangaNEW.
Me: Got any more?
Lucas: Yeah, well, um, what do you call a kangaroo that holds everything together?
Me: [genuinely baffled] What?
Lucas: KangaGLUE!
Me: [laughing again] That one's funny.
Lucas: What do kangaroos name their baby girls?
Me: What?
Lucas: KangaSUE. You know, I could do this all day.
Me: Except you have to go to school.
Lucas: Yeah.

Posted by adrienne at 08:30 PM | Comments (16)

May 07, 2007

What a Difference an "And" Makes

So the day started at 4:00am when Benny batted my nose to remind me that it was time to eat.

Then again at 5:00am when Ella puked breakfast up on my bed.

Then again around 7:00am when Lucas got to my house. (Tammy had a latte for me, or else I probably wouldn't have gotten up.)

Then I got to work and found this on the shelf where the new children's books wait to be processed (much to my coworkers' amusement):

I think maybe I meant to order this*:

Is it time to go home yet?

*And, okay, so I KNOW I meant to order this. I freaking love Mary Downing Hahn. Wait Till Helen Comes is my absolute favorite scary book for kids, and I always look forward to Hahn's new books. Still, maybe Jason made the mistake....

Posted by adrienne at 02:20 PM | Comments (10)

May 05, 2007

More Publicity Photos...

Jeffrey developed a bunch of photos and sent me some scans. I posted them over at my flickr. Comments welcome!

And now comes the part where I spend the rest of the weekend slacking. Weeeee!

Posted by adrienne at 11:28 AM | Comments (6)

May 02, 2007

“Motionless Fascination”

The Internets have been bursting with exciting things lately.

#1 – Fuse #8’s gone and written an article for The Horn Book about blogging. Woo hoo, Fuse! (For the record, I understand that Fuse has a first name and that it is Betsy, but I have a hard time referring to her that way.) Woo hoo to The Horn Book, too. The article’s bound to bring blogs to the attention of a lot of folks who haven’t been reading them. Fuse also created a list of “Kid-lit Bloggers to Watch,” and watat is on it! Her annotation even makes my lack of focus sound like it might be fun. Brilliant!

#2 – If you are not checking Brotherhood 2.0 a few times a day in case Hank or John Green have updated and bloglines hasn’t bothered to tell you yet, it’s because you have never watched one of their videos. I’ve been trying to keep my addiction a secret, but this week John had M.T. Anderson on Monday and Hank had Neil Gaiman on Tuesday. I cannot remain silent any longer. I love the Nerd Fighters.

#3 – MotherReader is taking signups for this year’s 48 Hour Book Challenge, which will be held the weekend of June 8-10. I signed up and have been busily making a list of what I hope to read. It will be the kickoff to My Summer of Reading All the Fiction I Haven’t Been Reading While Writing the Homeschooling Book. I get all warm and fuzzy every time I think about it.

#4 – I don’t know how I missed this when she first posted it, but Alkelda from Saints and Spinners made a swell “Some Blog” graphic that she's inviting everyone to use. How cool is that?

#5 – I very recently made a last-round decision to go to this year’s BookExpo in NYC. Peer pressure from Jason, the siren song of NYC, and all the coolness the conference is promising all acted against thoughts like, “What if I need to finish up the book that weekend?” or “Won’t I be tired?” and “Haven’t I traveled enough lately?” This will be my third BookExpo, which is a busy, tiring conference that I love because it is entirely devoted to books. No conference has more authors and publishers, and no one talks about issues I’ve had enough of, such as the plusses and minuses of allowing cell phone use in the library (which is so 2005 – get over it, people). As a bonus, I think I may meet some other kidlit bloggers IRL. For the rest of you, there’s still time! Check out the schedule, register, and let’s plan to get together for coffee or drinks. Needless to say, I plan on picking up plenty more books to read during the 48 Hour Challenge and My Summer of Reading All the Fiction I Haven’t Been Reading While Writing the Homeschooling Book.

#6 – Don’t forget the Series Binder Wiki. I didn’t used to understand about wikis, but I have learned that they are almost as addictive as Brotherhood 2.0. We’re adding to and improving the Series Binder all the time. Link to it, become a contributor, use it for nefarious purposes. We made it for the masses.

Posted by adrienne at 09:22 AM | Comments (4)

May 01, 2007

Jeffrey Clearly Enjoys Feedback

Per Jason's and Jen's suggestions, Jeffrey took the face off the one photo and put it on the other:

It's kind of disturbing.

You can view a couple more pretty pictures in which I don't look like a nightmare over at my flickr. Comments are, as always, encouraged.

Posted by adrienne at 04:57 PM | Comments (9)

Picture for Book

When Jeffrey visits, we don't let him sit around and relax. No, we make him work. On this visit, his job was to get a head shot for me to send to ALA Editions to use for publicity purposes.

Yeah, that's right, a publicity photo.

To tell you the truth, the whole idea that I need a publicity photo kind of freaks me out.

Anyway, he sent me a couple of the digital ones he thought were candidates. Here's the one I really like:

This one's taken in my office at work. What I like about it is that I look happy (I was) and that the spine labels on the books behind me are saying "HI."

I blame the crow's feet on five years of working at the Webster Public Library. I didn't have those things when I started there. Ah, well.

I like this one less:

I love my forsythia -- so yellow and pretty this time of year. I, however, look uncomfortable (I was). It was nice and sunny that day, which, apparently, is better for Jeffrey when he's working with his digital camera, but I can't help but notice how much I'm squinting. Jeffrey kept telling me to open my eyes, but it was *hard*. I asked him if I could wear my sunglasses, but he said no.

I also want to reach in and tug down my shirt.

Other than that, though, I like the photo. I look like I may be up to something. That's always good.

Jeffrey took a bunch of photos on film which have yet to be developed, so we'll have more to pick from at some point.

Just for the record, all comments on this entry shall begin, "Adrienne, you are very beautiful and Jeffrey is very talented...." If your comment doesn't begin that way, do not blame me if it gets lost in the review process.

Posted by adrienne at 09:50 AM | Comments (17)

April 30, 2007

Happy Anniversary to Me

Yesterday was my five-year anniversary of working at WPL.

I celebrated by having a lovely weekend having my picture taken (thanks, Jeffrey!), eating wonderful food (thanks, Jeffrey!), and going to the Leaf and Bean twice a day (thanks, Jeffrey!). I was having so much fun, I forgot all about my anniversary until I looked at my calendar last night. It’s okay, though, because I have the rest of the week off to do more celebrating. Well, technically, I’ll be writing my book, but I’ll be at home and I still have the Leaf and Bean and leftovers from the dinner Jeffrey cooked. These are celebratory things.

The striking thing is that I have now officially worked at WPL longer than any other job I’ve held. Previous to this, my longest-running job was at McDonald’s, where I worked for four years while I was in college. When I go on interviews, potential employers always ask me how my experience at McDonald’s helps me in my work today, and I tell them that working reference is a lot like working the drive-thru, which is true. I also tell them that I once had a man throw a 22-ounce Coke at my head and another one tell me to die (on my birthday, no less), which is another way of saying that I’ve seen enough odd and inappropriate behavior that it takes something really off-the-beam to phase me.

Less so since Brian died, but that’s another story.

I’ve worked at a surprising number of libraries in my ten years as a librarian (TEN YEARS? HOW DID THAT HAPPEN???) – an earthquake engineering research center library (I’m not making that up), the Lockport Public Library, Genesee Community College’s library, Maplewood in the city, and then Webster. I feel like I worked for a number of years at a couple of those places, but when I subtract five years off my ten, I realize that’s not possible. I suppose I could figure it all out if I had to, but it’s funny how time gets all fuzzy in my brain. I was obviously restless in my early career, but I’ve settled right down in Webster. I’m comfortable. I’m happy. I get to do interesting things. I have enough challenges to keep me busy and engaged but not so many that I don’t feel like I can manage them (most days). I’m lucky enough to work with people who are also my friends. I make fun of the old “Where Life is Worth Living” slogan, but I like the community in Webster. People are serious about their kids, and the Children’s Room is almost always a happening place. Five years at WPL is a thing worth celebrating. So yay, more to WPL than to me.

Posted by adrienne at 09:31 AM | Comments (7)

April 27, 2007

Why I Don't Have a Poetry Friday Post, Yet Again

#1 - Jeffrey is here.
#2 - We had to go to the Leaf and Bean a couple times.
#3 - And the Eastman House.
#4 - And WEGMANS.
#5 - And a few other places, like work and Lori's Natural Foods.
#6 - After all that, Jeffrey was preparing food for our big dinner tomorrow, and I had an important job to do, which involved sitting and talking and occasionally playing with the cats.

Mostly we've been talking about how wonderful the Leaf and Bean is and what we might get there the next time we go. It's a more pressing issue for Jeffrey, since he's only here until Sunday. In 24 hours, Jeffrey pretty much took in all of my life routine -- hang out with Lucas in the morning, hang out at the Leaf and Bean, eat, take in the occasional cultural event, spend more time eating, lots of lolling, occasional work. It's a good life and good company. Next time we need Heather here, though.

Posted by adrienne at 11:10 PM | Comments (9)

April 21, 2007

The Bunny Peeps Get All Cliquey About the Newest Peeps in Their Midst

It's true that my friends spoil me. This Easter brought a Peep lollipop from Lori AND a Peep wind-up toy from Xandi, and then Patty emailed me a link to this photo essay that puts my efforts to shame.

The Peeps sure are busy.

Posted by adrienne at 09:27 PM | Comments (3)

April 20, 2007

I'm Behind on Things Again...

This is what happened:

1. I read fiction.
2. I also read a bunch of magazines.
3. I decided to finally do something about the disaster area I call an office -- both at work (less successful) and at home (more successful).
4. I watched a few movies.
5. I stayed up too late several days in a row.
6. I got up too early several corresponding days in a row.

So I feel great, but I haven't managed to do things like read all the blogs I like to follow or even write decent entries for my own blog. You can see that I missed yesterday entirely, and though I had an idea for Poetry Friday today, I never got around to actually writing it up.

Shocking, I know.

I have some things I want to write about, though, and I'm hoping to get back into my blogging routine this weekend. I'd hate to have you all thinking that I've turned into a slacker.

Posted by adrienne at 10:09 PM | Comments (2)

April 17, 2007

"You Take Up My Time Like Some Cheap Magazine"

While I was away, I got mail from a couple friends whose kids are doing magazine subscription fundraisers – one for school (Go, Kendall!) and one for Girl Scouts.

These fundraisers are brilliant:

#1 – I get mail.
#2 – It gives me an excuse to send mail.
#3 – I am forced to subscribe to magazines to support the education of my friends’ children.

This happened to be good timing because I’ve been thinking of resubscribing to a few magazines. When Brian was dying and then I was grieving, I let most of my subscriptions lapse (with the exception of Rolling Stone – a girl’s got to have something and, besides, my dad gets that one for me). Like everything else, my magazines got too overwhelming. But I miss them. I look forward to getting my hair cut and going to the grocery store primarily because I can at least take in the headlines. Now that I’m starting to see potential guilt-free reading time after I hand in the book at the beginning of June, I keep thinking that maybe I'll have time to read whole articles.

In the interest of irony, I want to tell you that I have chosen to support the education of my friends’ children by subscribing to Entertainment Weekly and Premiere. I also considered Vogue, Vanity Fair, and The New Yorker. One of these things is not like the other there, but, really, The New Yorker covers a lot of pop culture, which is one of the many reasons I love it. I decided that I’m not quite ready to have something that time-consuming hitting my mailbox once a week yet, though. Maybe later in the year. Until then, at least I’ll have my basic entertainment news covered.

It’s absurd how excited I am about this.

Posted by adrienne at 08:19 AM | Comments (19)

April 15, 2007

The Washington Post

Yes, it's true: the boy's gone national.

Awwwww.

Posted by adrienne at 10:53 AM | Comments (11)

April 14, 2007

Signs of Spring

I don't know why this keeps happening to me, but every spring, a robin or two goes crazy and tries to take over my house. It usually starts when some robin gets it into his head to start attacking his reflection in the window in my office that overlooks the backyard. It's hard to believe if you've never seen this phenomenon, but if you don't put a stop to it, the robin will energetically continue to attack his reflection until he injures himself so badly that he can no longer attack. My approach to the whole thing is to hang a piece of cheesecloth on the window to cut the reflection until the robins get a little less crazy.

Not that the robins stop there.

Once they're done attacking my innocent window, one of them almost always decides to build a nest on the front porch, either in the clematis or (last year) one of our hanging baskets. The mother bird then proceeds to act like she's never seen me before, like she had no idea people even lived in the house, and like we are the world's biggest threats to her and her offspring. It's kind of magical to have birds nesting on your front porch, but it also gets tiresome to have an overwrought robin screeching at you every time you walk in or out of the house.

Yesterday, though, the robins came up with a new one. I arrived home after my week away only to find that a robin had decided that my car was his territory to defend and protect, which means that my car doors were almost completely covered in bird poo. Now it's true that I exaggerate sometimes (okay, a lot), but I assure you that I am not exaggerating here -- when I say "covered," I mean COVERED, as in you could not see the door through the poo when I went out there this morning. I washed the car and, in an attempt to defend and protect my territory, parked the car in the garage, which I dislike doing, but I think I dislike seeing my car caked with bird poo more.

Ah, home.

Posted by adrienne at 02:14 PM | Comments (3)

April 13, 2007

Tammy Absolutely Refused to Leave Washington Until We Spent Some Time Dancing with Our Friend Teddy

This was the only memorial we visited where the only other people there were a number of groundskeepers getting the place spruced up (you can't miss a couple of them there on the left), so, you know, we played around.

Posted by adrienne at 07:50 PM | Comments (3)

April 12, 2007

I'm Here, Too

Posted by adrienne at 09:50 AM | Comments (1)

Jen Makes a Wish

Jennifer's here!!!

Here, she is pointing out a mean-spirited wish on Yoko Ono's Wishing Tree in the sculpture garden on the Mall. It's worth noting that media sensation Lucas was photographed by The Washington Post while we were there. The photo's likely to run this weekend....

Posted by adrienne at 09:46 AM | Comments (6)

April 11, 2007

Tammy Having Fun

Tammy was cheerful at this moment because Ron was carrying the stroller down the stairs, which meant that she didn't have to. (We're at the zoo, near the Bird House.)

Posted by adrienne at 08:49 AM | Comments (3)

April 10, 2007

Lucas Has an Accident at the Lincoln Memorial

Posted by adrienne at 07:18 PM | Comments (2)

April 09, 2007

Max Embraces Freedom

And that is not all. Oh, no, that is not all.

Posted by adrienne at 10:31 PM | Comments (11)

April 08, 2007

Transitions

It wasn't until a year or two ago that it suddenly dawned on me that I'm one of those people who doesn't transition well. For instance, tomorrow I'm going to be leaving for my first-ever trip to Washington DC. We've been planning the trip since last summer, and I'm really looking forward to it. Still, right now, I'm stuck in the middle of thinking that I have almost everything packed and ready to go but not quite everything and maybe I'm forgetting something and it's not time to go to bed and it's not time to leave and shouldn't I be doing this or that and will the cats be okay while I'm gone and I wish it was tomorrow morning and we were in the car and on our way because I'll feel better then. Once I'm en route, I'm fine -- until it's time to come home. Then it's the same thing in reverse.

Posted by adrienne at 08:59 PM | Comments (4)

Benny Protects Skippyjon from the Stay Puft Marshmallow S'more

Easter's off to a good start here. Hope you're all having a good one....

Posted by adrienne at 12:02 PM | Comments (6)

April 01, 2007

Don't I Always Have Them Eating Out of the Palm of My Hand?: The Video

Posted by adrienne at 10:08 AM | Comments (2)

March 31, 2007

Don't I Always Have Them Eating Out of the Palm of My Hand?

Of course I do.

Posted by adrienne at 10:35 PM | Comments (3)

March 28, 2007

Rituals

With things turning to spring, Lucas and I have started our nice-weather ritual of walking to school in the morning. When my husband was alive, he went to work much earlier than I ever have, and, as a consequence, I was up earlier most days than I am now. (You'll think I'm exaggerating, but, noise-wise, Brian eating his cereal for breakfast was roughly equivalent to a thunder storm. It was no use trying to sleep through it.) Back then, I went for a walk every morning. Even though I gave the habit up as soon as I no longer had someone waking me up, I have to admit that the walks were good for me. Exercise is a positive thing by itself, but it’s always helped me wake up in the morning. The time outside helps me feel more centered, as does the time to think.

Walking with Lucas is a slightly different experience. Because there’s not much to do on a walk besides look at stuff and think, we often walk in thoughtful silence, but this is also a time when Lucas will talk about things that have very clearly been on his mind (like the day last year when he told me that he didn’t want to grow up because he didn’t want to die). Yesterday, the boy seemed to be thinking about gender.

Conversation #1
Lucas: You know, everyone thinks the tooth fairy is a girl, but no one really knows because no one’s ever seen the tooth fairy.
Me: Wow, I never thought about it, but I don’t know why we all think the tooth fairy is a girl.
Lucas: Here’s what somebody needs to do. Somebody needs to set up a camera at night so they can get the tooth fairy on tape. Then we’d know.
Me: Wow, there’s an idea. [Thinking, “Good luck with that one, Tammy.”]

Conversation #2
Lucas: I really like praying mantises because they’re interesting and I read that after they mate, the female bites the head off the male.
Me: [pause] Yeah, I’ve heard that, too, but I’m not sure if it’s true.
Lucas: MAN! Why does it have to be the male? [mumbles] Maybe because he’s smaller.
Me: …

Posted by adrienne at 10:57 AM | Comments (3)

March 27, 2007

It's NOT Just Me

I'm sure you all remember how I wrote an article called "Everything's Coming Up Sock Monkeys" for the last issue of The Edge of the Forest. (You read that, right? Jen Robinson called the article "unexpected," which I LOVED since I am, if nothing else, a woman of mystery.) Anyway, within 24 hours of TEOTF going live, Alkelda the Gleeful from Saints and Spinners told me about this new book called... Everything's Coming Up Sock Monkeys by Bonnie Kraus Connelly. Within hours of that, I had an email from Ms. Connelly herself, who is perfectly lovely. We shared some of our fondness for sock monkeys, and I sent her a photo of his wonderful display of sock monkeys and other creatures at the Strong Museum. And that, my friends, is why the Internet is so cool.

Bonnie's looking at sock monkeys from a cultural and historical perspective, and she knows A LOT more about sock monkeys than I do. Enthusiasts will want to check out her book and her web site.

Posted by adrienne at 09:19 PM | Comments (4)

March 26, 2007

Second Annual Greater Rochester Teen Book Festival

This Saturday, March 31
10:00am-5:00pm
Fairport High School
www.teenbookfestival.org

I am sooo excited about this year's TBF. First of all, last year's was riotous good fun. Second, the events are completely free of charge (although I highly recommend buying t-shirts and books and stuff to support the cause). Third, they have an awesome lineup of authors, including Svetlana Chmakova (Dramacon), Gail Giles (What Happened to Cass McBride?), and Tamora Pierce (You don't need me to offer titles here, right? Right.) If you're a writer or if you love teen fiction (or if, like me, you love both), it's so well worth making an effort to get there.

Besides all that, Olivia's been working like crazy in her second year serving on the committee that organizes and runs this thing. (You go on with your bad three-letter-word-memorizing self, O!!! WOO HOO YOU!!!) Not to mention that EVERYONE who's ANYONE is going to be there. You simply must go. I will hear no argument.

Posted by adrienne at 08:46 PM | Comments (6)

March 24, 2007

Yeah, Baby, It Is Spring!

Anatomy of a Spring Day

Yesterday was awesome. Technically, it was kind of today because I haven't yet gone to sleep, but, you know, whatever. I'm not real picky about time.

Anyway, among other things, while I was working on my book at Parkleigh, I got these cool paper doll notecards where you can use stickers to dress up the girls on the fronts of the cards. You can see the box along with a couple samples I plan to put in the mail soon here, along with evidence that I was really working on my book. See the computer? See the professional reading material? I like the girl on the left best. I love swingy dresses like that.

And look at the weather forecast! Right now, today, I feel like all things are possible. Sometimes it's scary how much the weather affects my mood. Of course, the three visits to the Leaf and Bean could have something to do with it, too....

Posted by adrienne at 12:37 AM | Comments (1)

March 23, 2007

“This Sentence Will Ruin/Save Your Life”: Not-So-Poetry Friday

Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
In ten more weeks
My book is due.

In other words, I’m afraid I don’t have time for a witty and/or semi-intelligent Poetry Friday post today, although it’s true I've been working on something I hope to post next week. We’ll see.

In the meantime, it’s Friday – and not everyone has a book due in ten weeks. If you’re looking for a way to make your day a little more fun, I humbly suggest:

Watch this “Banana Phone” video, by the people who brought you “The Llama Song” (so you know that it is joy personified).

Watch these videos Jim linked to at Buffalo Wings and Toasted Ravioli a while back. (“It's gonna be okay.” Tee hee hee.)

Enjoy 30 seconds of Bunnies and James Bond.

If you're a librarian, you could do something more directly work-related and read this PW article about forthcoming parenting titles. (I found the article most interesting and wound up ordering several titles based mostly on their titles, which were fun.)

And, last but never least, if you haven't started reading Jeffrey's blog, you should. He has begun addressing extremely important issues, by which I mean SHOES.

Posted by adrienne at 09:52 AM | Comments (7)

March 17, 2007

Girls Should Not Be Allowed to Gather in Groups of Three Even Though That’s What They Always Do

When Lucas and I went swimming at the Y yesterday, we ran into one of his friends/nemeses, Pearl (her mermaid name as opposed to her real name, which I don’t have permission to use and don’t know how to spell anyway). Pearl has been in Lucas’s classes since Kindergarten, and I am terribly fond of her. The way she beamed and dragged her friends straight over when she spotted us in the pool yesterday leads me to believe the feeling’s mutual. This is what happened:

Pearl: [TA DA! arms] THIS is Lucas’s aunt. She came to tell stories at our school this week!
Lucas: [mumbling while Pearl was still talking] Her name is Adrienne.
Pearl: [as if Lucas hadn’t just spoken] Her name is Adrienne! This [glance, dismissive wave] is Lucas. [looks more interested] Lucas!
Lucas: [looks alarmed]
Pearl: You’re still using a bubble! How cute!
Lucas: [sulking, not that Pearl noticed]
Pearl: [back to me] MY name is Pearl and THIS is Star and THIS is Cocoa. Those aren’t our REAL names, though. They’re our MERMAID NAMES. Cocoa isn’t really a mermaid, though.
Cocoa: I am a mermaid!
Pearl: Are not.
Cocoa: Are too.
Pearl: Are not.
Cocoa: IAMSOAMERMAIDTHETEACHERSAIDIAMI’MGOINGTOGOGETHERRIGHT NOW!!!
Pearl: Okay, you’re a mermaid.
Cocoa: Okay.

All I could think in my head was, "Must not laugh out loud. Must not laugh out loud."

Posted by adrienne at 12:11 AM | Comments (6)

March 14, 2007

Everybody Should Have Days Like This

My trip this past weekend was one of those ones in which a lot of things went right. On Saturday, we decided to explore Amherst, during the course of which we just happened to walk into a bookstore where Jane Yolen, Heidi Stemple, Brooke Dyer, and Jane Dyer were doing a reading/talk/signing. Here is photographic evidence (Jane Yolen and Heidi Stemple):

Mother/Daughter Author/Illustrator Event

I had Jane Yolen, Heidi Stemple, and Brooke Dyer all sign a copy of Sleep, Black Bear, Sleep, and then I got Jane Dyer to sign a copy of Cookies: Bite-Size Life Lessons (which, as you may recall, was one of my favorite picture books of 2006). This was very exciting.

How much cooler can a day get? This much:

Financial Advisor Magic 8 Ball

It's been well over a year since I found a Magic 8 Ball that I didn't already own, but in the very next shop we went to, there it was -- something that would add to my collection *and* help me figure out my finances. When I asked it what I should do next, it said, "Start own business." Hm. Sounds like a lot of work. Maybe I'll ask again later....

Posted by adrienne at 07:40 PM | Comments (4)

March 12, 2007

10 Things I Learned at the Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art

Me and My Picture

#1 - Clean bathrooms in a public building that serves children are really impressive.
#2 - Clean bathrooms that are also cool are even more impressive.
#3 - When the bathrooms are clean, cool, and have really nice child-friendly features, I have to take photographs of them.
#4 - I did more than hang out in the bathrooms.
#5 - They had these bins filled with books all over the museum, and I love them.
#6 - I think this would be a cool project to do in a program at the library this summer.
#7 - So would this.
#8 - The museum has a special Friday night program once a month for families ("First Fridays @ The Carle"). It lasts a couple hours. The museum offers food, stories, a movie, and a craft. We could totally do something like this at WPL. People would like it, and it would be fun.
#9 - This play area for toddlers is lovely.
#10 - This is a fun idea for little ones, too.

Posted by adrienne at 06:03 PM | Comments (10)

March 11, 2007

Topsy-Turvy

Whenever I get home from a trip, I never know what to do first. I want to pay attention to the cats and call Tammy and eat and blog and download photos and unpack and start some laundry and read the mail and open the package that came while I was gone and do a little writing and play with my new stuff. This is all the more problematic when I don’t get home until 8:30 on a Sunday night and I have to work the next day. It’s all a matter of setting priorities. I’ve eaten, I’ve called Tammy, and my photos are downloading, but now the highest priority is kicking in. I’m telling stories to Lucas’s class tomorrow at 2:30. I know I do this sort of thing all the time as part of my job, but this is a higher-pressure situation: I really have to impress Lucas AND his classmates, and they’ve already seen me do a lot of my best stuff since I’ve been telling stories to his classes every year that he’s been in school. YIKES! I better get busy finalizing my plan, and then it’s off for my beauty sleep. More tomorrow….

Posted by adrienne at 09:56 PM | Comments (0)

March 08, 2007

"Give a Little Time for the Child Within You"

I'm at work this morning, but at 1:00, I'm leaving for a professional development trip to the Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art.

!!!

Excuse me while I do my Instead-of-Coming-to-Work-Tomorrow-I'm-Going-to-be-Looking-at-Original-Art-by-Quentin-Blake Dance....

Okay, I'm back.

!!!

The downside? My blogging activities may be severely curtailed as I have no idea where my next Internet access is coming from. My regular readers are always on my mind, though, and if I possibly can, I will post updates. In the meantime, try to be good.

!!!

Posted by adrienne at 11:14 AM | Comments (0)

March 06, 2007

Is That All?

When I was nineteen, I married an engineer. He wasn’t officially an engineer back then, but he’d already developed the engineer’s most essential skill – the ability to make things operate without reading the instructions. This meant that stuff in my house worked without much interference from me, and I sure as heck didn’t waste my time reading a manual when Bri could tell me everything I needed to know over a cup of coffee. Since Bri died, though, one of the many things I’ve been forced to learn is that instruction manuals can, indeed, be instructive. They can also be unintentionally amusing. Take, for instance, the manual for our new phone service. I was reading the step-by-step instructions on how to use caller ID:

1.) First you receive an incoming telephone call.
2.) Immediately following the first ring, the Caller ID display device will show the name and telephone number of the person making the incoming call.
3.) You simply read the Caller ID display device and decide whether or not you want to answer the telephone call.

Maybe this is just another sign that I’m mentally imbalanced, but this made me laugh for five minutes straight. Part of it is because it’s absurd (you’ve received the phone call in step one, which does sort of make the rest of the steps moot, right?), but part of it is because it’s so darned clinical.

Of course, while we’re on the topic of manuals, I feel compelled to mention that when I got a new wireless router for the house a few weeks ago, I couldn’t get it running until I decided to ignore the manual and do what made sense in my head. Then I had the thing running in two minutes. Go figure.

Posted by adrienne at 10:33 PM | Comments (12)

March 05, 2007

So How About that Book?

My contract with ALA Editions stipulates that my homeschooling book will be 50,000-55,000 words long. If you aren't a writer who's ever had to worry about word count, you probably have some notion that this is a lot of words, but even being a writer with a fair amount of experience counting words, I have a hard time wrapping my mind around 50,000-55,000 of them. Currently, my longest published piece clocks in at just under 3000 words. Most things I publish are in the neighborhood of 200-600.

I like to joke that I don't understand numbers higher than twenty, but even I understand that 50,000 is a really, really big number.

I have faced any number of terrifying things in my life, but these 50,000-55,000 words are ranking in my top five list. This weekend, though, I hit a milestone: 20,000 words. 13,000 are in chapters I consider done, and the rest are hither and yon in chapters-in-progress. The shape of the book is ever-more solid in my mind. It's weird the way the book has gone from an abstract number to something I can almost see off in the distance. It's also really cool. It will be cooler when I hit 40,000 words, which won't be that far away. I could only manage to write a couple hundred words at a time when I first started working on the book (probably because I was devoting so much time to background research and reading), but now when I sit down, I crank out a couple thousand words without a problem. Then there's the editing, editing, editing. Have I ever mentioned how much I love revision? Yeah, I love revision. If it weren't for deadlines, I'd probably never call anything finished.

So the book? 20,000 words. And counting.

Posted by adrienne at 11:54 AM | Comments (9)

February 28, 2007

Things to Remember...

He's Kind of a Freak, But I Really Like Him

I may be screwing up any number of things in my own life, but I'm doing something right for this guy. We've been obsessed with a 300 piece jungle-themed puzzle the last few mornings, so that's been fun. And this morning, after weeks of watching me eat grapefruit for breakfast, Mr. Picky Eater casually asked if he could have some. Then he ate it and asked for more. If only all of life could be so rewarding.

When he's not acting like a freak, Lucas has told me that he's working on two new books. I will post more details as they become available.

Posted by adrienne at 06:14 PM | Comments (1)

February 27, 2007

“That’s All I Want Right Now, With Some Juice… No, Coffee”

Have you ever had one of those days where you screw up so many things that it gets hard to keep track of every stupid thing you’ve said and done? I’ve been having those days on a pretty regular basis for four or five weeks now. It’s getting tiresome. I keep wondering when Together Adrienne is going to come back and get everything under control, but that isn’t happening. No, instead, life seems to be getting more and more overwhelming and I’m getting more and more overtired, which I notice only leads to more stupid things. Vicious cycle and all that.

On the bright side, the news about my cholesterol has disturbed me enough that I’m paying attention to what I eat and – even more amazing – modifying my diet. I may do twenty five other stupid things in a day, but at least I’m eating more fresh fruits and vegetables and cutting down on my consumption of ice cream and cheese. I’ve also been trying the cycling classes at the Y, which seems to be the class for all the people who care about fitness. I don’t care about fitness, of course. I’m just trying to figure out how little I can exercise and still retain my youth/health, and cycling classes are efficient in this regard. They also make me feel like maybe my body is going to stop functioning. It hasn’t yet. I mean, my brain’s been malfunctioning, but I can hardly blame that on exercise. Maybe I’ll blame winter. I don’t know. Right now, I’m going to try going to bed. Tomorrow’s a new day, right?

Posted by adrienne at 09:33 PM | Comments (11)

February 25, 2007

It Only Took 4 Years, 9 Months, and 25 Days

April 29th will be my five-year anniversary of working at WPL. I started just a couple weeks before Webster opened a new library, and, in fact, the plans for the Children’s Room were what upgraded my interest in working at WPL from “vague” to “I must.” The Children’s Room is set up like a park – complete with a picket fence, a gazebo, a river, a bridge, a rainbow, clouds, and the sun. The great thing about coming into the project at the time I did was that everything was planned and almost done. I would just be responsible for finishing things up.

1763 days later, I’m still working on it.

There were a few things I noticed right away that were going to be problems or need attention in the new building, and there are things I’ve noticed since. That’s part of working in any building, really. One of the biggest problems that was driving me crazy for the 152,150,400 seconds leading up to this past Friday was that there wasn’t enough light in the most landlocked parts of the room (near the Story Room, for those who have visited us in person). The area has very high ceilings and, for some unknown reason, they decided to light it with little cans that only shed light figuratively. There were shadows and the whole area felt dreary. I told my boss at the time, Marvin, that it was a problem, and he kept selling me variants of, “Yeah, we’ll take care of that soon.” That went on for a few years. Then he retired. Then I started singing my song to my new boss, Terri, who finally gave me the go-ahead to do something about it sometime this past summer.

Then we ran into several of my anxieties: a lack of confidence when dealing with anything involving electricity, uncertainty over what needed to be done, reluctance to commit to big physical changes in my space, and outright hatred of talking to strangers on the phone. Between my anxiety and plenty of other things to do, I put off calling anyone until December. Then the first guy I called came in and treated me exactly the way that professional women hope men won’t treat them. This unhinged me enough that Jason volunteered to take over the project (whether it was out of concern for me or a desire to shut me up, I cannot say). It took him a couple weeks to come up with a solution, and then Terri took care of getting multiple estimates, getting the right approvals, and getting it scheduled.

So I came in to work Friday and found a clean, well-lighted place.

In the end, it took the electrician a couple hours to install those lights. I was so happy when I saw the light that I almost started crying right there in the middle of the Children’s Room. I’ve been in the library every day since, and I still have a hard time not staring at the radiant wonderfulness. It’s hard to say what amazes me more: how long it took to do something so simple or how satisfying it is to finally see it done. Seeing the difference, I realize that I should have worked more stridently to get it done sooner, but maybe the real moral of the story is that if I whine about something long enough, eventually someone will take care of my problem – if only to shut me up. Have I ever mentioned that they treat me really well at WPL? Because, yeah, they do.

Posted by adrienne at 11:02 PM | Comments (4)

February 22, 2007

If It's Good Enough for the Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus...

It's easy to underestimate Tammy's husband, Ron. On the outside – most especially around people he doesn't know – Ron is quiet. It's easy to believe that this is because he isn't thinking or doesn't have much to say, but it’s more that Ron won’t talk to people until he’s decided they’re worth the bother. He figures he has better things to do, and, generally, he does.

Of course, Ron’s displays of willful thinking aren’t always welcome. A few months ago, for instance, he decided that it would be a good idea to introduce Lucas to pro wrestling. We believe that Ron thinks this will give Lucas something to talk to other boys his age about, although why Ron thinks this is important, we don’t know. Lucas seems to get along just fine with other kids; he just prefers the company of adults, probably because we’re interesting and have the legal ability to drive. Anyway, when Lucas was telling me about his wrestling shows the other day, he started complaining about how one was only available in Spanish and how he was going to have to learn Spanish so he could understand what everyone was saying. I took the breath to say, “That show’s recorded in English. Someone has to be airing it.” But that’s when I realized Ron’s brilliance. Ron doesn’t mind if Lucas watches wrestling, but he doesn’t want him to hear what the participants are saying – and the show in Spanish provides a perfect solution. Lucas doesn’t understand the dialog, and he’s starting to see why it might be useful to learn a foreign language.

And people say you shouldn’t lie to your kids. Pshaw. See what good can come of it?

Posted by adrienne at 10:00 PM | Comments (2)

February 20, 2007

"Sleeping is a Gateway Drug to Being Awake Again"

It seems that we might be experiencing some technical difficulties with the comment function here in the land of pink. I love comments more than fried egg sandwiches, so I can only tolerate this for so long. My current plan is to hope that the elves come and fix things under the cover of night. If any of you experience commenting difficulty tomorrow, though, please send me email so I'll know that it's time to consider taking more direct action.

In the meantime, I'm exhausted. It must be time for good girls to go to bed....

Posted by adrienne at 10:35 PM | Comments (5)

February 19, 2007

Happy Birthday, Dear Tammy

Yeah, so, it turns out that Tammy's spending her birthday at home with two puking kids. She felt badly that I took the day off until I pointed out that I was having a perfectly lovely day as I had slept in and no one had yet puked on me. She said that this is karma getting her back from when she took my birthday off in December even though I had to go to work. I said that karma could not possibly be that cruel. Tammy's life is a bit cruel from time-to-time, though. We must send her vomit-free birthday wishes. I'll also be bringing her some cookies I baked, although I don't know if she'll want to eat them....

Posted by adrienne at 11:07 AM | Comments (3)

February 13, 2007

“But, Mama, That’s Where the Fun Is”

Conversation between Lucas and I in the car on Saturday morning:

Lucas: Aunt Adrienne, you should get a new TV, one with stations like, you know, 5 and 8 and 10, so you can watch TV shows like a normal person.
Me: Um, well, what would I watch?
Lucas: [pause] The Daily Show, The Colbert Report…. [pause] I’m not sure what else. I’m a kid. You’re a grown-up. We watch different things.
Me: I do like The Daily Show and The Colbert Report, but I could watch them on the Internet. I don’t, but I could.
Lucas: Oh, yeah! You could watch Robot Chicken at your house so Mom can delete the ones on our DVR.

It’s official: the 7-year-old has figured out that I don’t watch TV, judged me, and attempted to provide me with guidance to help me fit in better with the other adults. I guess the next step will be figuring out that I’m a bit of a hopeless case.

Posted by adrienne at 09:04 PM | Comments (5)

February 04, 2007

Of All the Stages of Grief, Shock Was My Favorite

I got married on a Thursday at about 1:00 in the afternoon at the Sweden Town Hall in Brockport. Brian and I wore jeans. Truly, I think I may have worn sweatpants. We were in college, and we both had to work that night. Tammy was with us, and Matt. As soon as the judge said, “This is a solemn occasion,” we all had to look at the floor instead of each other, since we were all about to laugh because this occasion seemed anything but solemn. It was surreal. We were nineteen, the first in our group of friends to get married. It was, at once, the most grown-up and amazingly childish thing I’d done in my life. After that day, our slogan for marriage was, “All it takes is $50 and a valid form of ID.” That was fourteen years ago today, though, and it might cost more now. I could look it up, but accuracy isn’t the point.

Acceptance is the most boring stage of grief – so final.

Give me a few points for anger, though. I’m mildly irritated that the Super Bowl is infringing on my thwarted wedding anniversary. (WHY are there not names for these things?) Bri loved the Super Bowl, which is one of the reasons I’ve been boycotting it the last few years. Brian was the only thing that made watching the Super Bowl even slightly interesting; if I can’t watch it with him, I’m not watching it. Instead I’m going to bake chocolate chip pumpkin muffins and watch Home Movies, an appropriately childish and grown-up response, if I do say so myself. And I do.

Posted by adrienne at 07:54 PM | Comments (15)

February 03, 2007

Genetics Suck

I knew going for that blood test was a Bad Idea.

I got a letter today: turns out my cholesterol’s high.

In my family, high cholesterol is something of a badge of honor. Everyone has it, and members of my family who haven’t yet suffered a cholesterol-related ailment like to brag about how high their cholesterol is with no visible effect. They report doctors saying things like, “I’ve never seen cholesterol that high” and “You should be having a heart attack right now.” The last time I had my cholesterol tested (several years ago now), my cholesterol was perfect. Now it’s high. Not bragging-rights high, but, still, a little elevated.

Foolishly, I thought my efforts to control my diet and get some regular exercise would save me from going down this path, but my doctor actually suggested that I’m going to need to work on my diet and exercise to get this straightened out. It’s true that I eat a lot of eggs, but that’s about as bad as it gets. I love dairy products of all types, but I don’t eat cheese and ice cream nearly as much as I used to. Most of my dairy comes in the form of skim milk, even in my lattes. I don’t eat that much processed food; I don’t even eat that much meat. I don’t think I’m overweight (although now I’m reconsidering that position), and I tend to think of myself as someone who exercises. I mean, I was at the Y doing *something* between the hours of 8:00 and 9:00 this morning. I was led to believe it was aerobics. I’m pretty sure I do that a couple times a week, plus yoga and swimming in between. I’m not Miss Fitness, but I don’t exactly live a sedentary life. There’s the writing, of course, and the reading and movie-watching, but there’s also things like running around with Lucas and cleaning my house and walking around that big library where I work.

Gah. I’m going to go call my dad and tell him it’s all his fault.

Posted by adrienne at 04:59 PM | Comments (4)

February 01, 2007

“Lolly, Lolly, Lolly”

As a librarian, particularly a children’s librarian, I abhor censorship, but when you work with children as long as I have, the urge to censor something is bound to creep up every now and again. And maybe it’s the stress and sleep deprivation talking, but I had my first true urge to censor something the other day, something that I felt in my heart maybe Lucas just wasn’t ready for.

Adverbs.

You heard me right. We’ve been doing Mad Libs in the mornings, and while Lucas has nouns, verbs, and adjectives down, adverbs are still giving him trouble. So we’ve been working on them, but the other morning I thought, “Why am I doing this?” I mean, people actually really totally overuse adverbs all the time, and I had this crazy thought that if Lucas didn’t know what adverbs were, maybe he wouldn’t wind up having to go through all the trouble of having to learn not to overuse them. I know this is crazytalk on any number of levels, but it’s interesting to me that the thing that activated my censorship gene wasn’t cursing or innuendos or nudity – no, no, my problem turned out to be with a part of speech.

Could I be more of a nerd?

Posted by adrienne at 06:16 AM | Comments (9)

January 31, 2007

“And the Undead are Like a Bunch of Friends that Demand Constant Attention”

[This morning.]

Lucas: I wish it was Thursday.
Me: What happens on Thursdays?
Lucas: I don’t know.
Me: That’s weird.
Lucas: But it will be FEBRUARY!!! [You could hear the exclamation points.]

[Later.]

Lucas: Aunt Adrienne, when are you coming to read to my class again?
Me: March.
Lucas: I love March! It's my favorite month! And April, too.

For those of you who patronize the Leaf & Bean (my condolences if you live too far away to do so), you simply MUST try their seasonal French Kiss Latte. Yum, yum, yum.

Randomosity: live it, love it. Perhaps I'll find coherence tomorrow.

Posted by adrienne at 10:02 AM | Comments (10)

January 29, 2007

The Five Stages of Writing a Book, or Thank You, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

1. Denial
“Writing a book is no big deal. It won’t take a lot of time out of my life. Really.”

2. Anger
“WHY CAN’T I GET ANYTHING DONE EVER??? WHY DID MY COMPUTER DIE??? WHY CAN’T I FIND MY NOTES??? I HATE EVERYTHING!!!”

3. Bargaining
“If chapter three writes itself while I’m sleeping, I promise I’ll start being someone people would describe as ‘patient,’ ‘sweet,’ and ‘kind.’”

4. Depression
“I am never going to finish this book.”

5. Acceptance
“All right. Short assignments. Back to work.”

It’s worth noting that writers don’t necessarily advance through these stages in the same way. Some go through the stages in order, some tarry longer in some stages than others, and some go back and forth between stages several times. Writing is a very personal business, and no two people experience writing in quite the same way.

Posted by adrienne at 07:19 PM | Comments (8)

January 23, 2007

Just Say No to Tetanus (and Diphtheria)

I’m not one of those people who avoids doctors, but, despite visiting a variety of doctors for issues that have come up through the years (read: hideous allergies), I somehow managed to go about fifteen years without having an actual physical. Brian was on my case about it before he died, but I told him I’d take care of it “later.” I finally got around to it yesterday.

It’s not exactly an experience I’d recommend.

Just to start, if you give medical professionals an excuse to look over your records, they’ll realize things like that you’re WAY overdue on your tetanus shot. And have you had a tetanus shot lately? They HURT. My arm, which was perfectly fine before I went to the doctor’s office, is still sore like someone punched it. Hard. They gave me a little informational sheet to go with my shot that informed me that I was getting two inoculations for the price of one: tetanus AND diphtheria. You can see the sheet here, complete with the misleading drawing of a little girl doing a “ta-da” pose, like she’s so happy that she is going to be protected from all that big, bad tetanus and diphtheria. Clearly no one’s punched her in the arm with a needle yet.

Also, thanks to my family history, I get to go for a fasting cholesterol test later this week. Fasting makes me pass out. Having my blood taken makes me pass out. At least I can count on getting adequate care when I pass out in a medical facility (as opposed to some random place on the street, which I’ve also done). I can’t get the staff to comprehend that I’m going to pass out before it happens, of course, but when I go ahead and lose consciousness, they’re very attentive.

The doctor also asked a lot of nosy questions about my eating and exercising habits. Then he judged me. I could tell. (Doctor: “Well, your eating habits are pretty good, and you’re getting more exercise than a lot of people.” Implying: “You could do better if you tried, Ms. Furness.”)

I guess it’s nice to get a little reassurance that my health is pretty much on track (sans bloodwork, which could reveal all manner of whatever). Preventative medicine is a good thing. Catching problems early is a good thing. I know these things in my head, but, ironically, my health isn’t something I worry about. My secondhand experience of Brian’s cancer taught me that, if you listen, your body tells you when something’s wrong, and I tend to assume that most of the time, even something that seems alarming turns out to be not that big of a deal.

Not to mention I’m kind of tired of doctors. (Doctor: “You can get a list of ACM labs at the front desk.” Me: “I know where they all are.” Doctor: “Oh, yeah. Sorry.”)

Posted by adrienne at 12:20 AM | Comments (11)

January 20, 2007

The View from My Front Porch Yesterday

Isn't it pretty? I love snowy days when I can just hang around the house and enjoy the view. Yesterday was a movie-watching day, so I'll have more to report soon enough....

(Jason shot the video, incidentally, not me. Credit where credit's due and all.)

Posted by adrienne at 08:19 PM | Comments (6)

January 17, 2007

Raising a Writer

A lot has been written about how one goes about raising a reader, but much less is written about raising a writer. Perhaps it’s because while many adults consider themselves readers, not so many consider themselves Writers. Most people write every day – things like letters, emails, memos, phone messages, and grocery lists. When most people think of Writing, though, what they’re really thinking of this is this compulsive thing I do that doesn’t net much cash, just the sort of thing many parents are reluctant to encourage their children to pursue (or so I understand from other writers – kudos to my parents for always encouraging my writing).

Reading Creative Communications by Sandra Garant over the weekend (see my review over at Homeschooling and Libraries) got me thinking more about the ways we’ve been making Lucas into a writer (and a Writer). That child has always been surrounded by words and books, a good first step for anyone, but our biggest goal, I think, was to make him a reader. When he was first starting to read independently, though, I worried about the horrid little photocopied-and-stapled-together phonics readers the school gave him to practice his skills. They covered phonics just fine, but they were also complete drivel. I brought home some decent readers from the library, but I also started sending Lucas letters. Little did I know that in addition to giving him a good reason to read, getting mail would spark his interest in sending mail – and so our two-year-long correspondence began (much enabled by Tammy, resident buyer of supplies, addresser of envelopes, and finder of mailboxes).

Of course, Lucas doesn’t just write letters to me, and he’s found numerous other applications for his writing skills. We encourage his story-writing and illustrating by reading everything he writes with interest and asking questions. We scan things and post them on the Internet. We show our friends. Now, much to my joy, Lucas claims he wants to write and illustrate books when he grows up. This morning before school, he happily worked on a story while I happily wrote letters. Honestly, how much better could life get? Lucas has also recently added song-writing to his list of things to do. Speaking of lists, thanks to his mother, he has also become a prodigious maker of them: things he hopes to do, places he wants to go, things he wants to eat. It seems to me that raising a writer is not only relatively easy; it's also hugely entert